Wednesday, November 30, 2005

Time Heals All Things

Time cools, time clarifies; no mood can be maintained quite unaltered through the course of hours.
Mark Twain US humorist, novelist, short story author, & wit (1835 - 1910)

Time is a productive friend or a wasteful enemy, however we choose to implement it. I lost years, yet now I view with joy every moment I have left instead of regretting all that I can never recall.
Time and space are close cousins; the one grants the other to all who agree to let nature take its course and every emotion have its due. Space protects us from further wounding, while time heals whatever we do not continue to pick at. Natural law can rule here, or we can try to control it. We cannot hope to succeed, but humans are stubborn animals.
Fix what can be reached from where you are then let time handle the rest. Do not feed agony, let it die a natural death of starvation. We are not meant to linger overlong in a hopeless state or we just become an extension of it. Remember that time will not stand still while you struggle to decide which way to jump to get off the track you stand on. It will blow its whistle then barrel over you like a runaway train. Jump on board and ride while you still possess a ticket.


Tuesday, November 29, 2005


Discovery consists of seeing what everybody has seen and thinking what nobody has thought.
Albert von Szent-Gyorgyi Irving Good
The Scientist Speculates (1962)US biochemist (1893 - 1986)

Point of view is something most people do not dwell on overlong and in the process of overlooking its importance they miss so many things that would explain so much. When someone acts in a certain way the reason behind it is more telling than the act itself. And understanding their point of view can fine tune an impression into a more forgiving conclusion.
When someone acts out and your feelings are raw, take a moment to look deeper. You may have done a small deed that wounded them without realizing it would hurt them at all. You may have done nothing at all, except be in the path of someone else's frustration. If you are innocent in intent or blameless by innocence, why take instance offence. Pain pours out of people in many fashions and most of them are not pretty. Do not accept the blame if it is not yours, but do not lose sight of the fact that something lit the fireworks.
Hints about the location and length of the fuse will be there. All it takes to begin seeing deeper is a willingness to put yourself in their place for a moment. Most people are starved for someone to really understand without judgment. Do not grade or invade where gentle observation and an open mind will work better to mend whatever is suddenly broken. I have often found that by not adding to the mess a door naturally opens, allowing clarity and compromise.
The man on the mountain top in the picture has a unique point of view. But then again so does everyone else. Where you stand and how you got there matters and if the people you are close to have a clear vision of where you are coming from they can better aid you to where you are going.


Monday, November 28, 2005

Walking Between The Lines

The guy who takes a chance, who walks the line between the known and unknown, who is unafraid of failure, will succeed.
Gordon Parks

I travel that line, unafraid of failure. And my success is assured, but its scope is not. I can affect the heights I reach in a way nobody else can. How far I travel will be on me. Can I stay the course? Will I put all my energy into making my future secure enough so that I can continue doing what I was meant to do? There is no hesitation in my answer... YES I CAN, OF COURSE I WILL.
First of all, I do not fold under weight. I expand in unlimited ways with pressure applied by something that I must learn about to reach my goals. I expand in the same fashion from pressure directed by others with my needs and goals in mind. I am both a teacher and a student in this endeavor and all others that I tackle. And that was the case long before I was even aware of it. I faced the fire over and over and not only survived, but thrived.
I was silent for such a long time, but my mind kept a perfect play by play. I gave all for twenty years to a cause that deserved not over a minute or two of my time once the pattern was set. And I kept at it long enough to turn it around to a more comfortable fit. It was not perfect, by any means, but for ten years I did not have to duck fists, suffer verbal attacks, or edit anything I said.
I am one of the walking wounded who found a purpose worthy of dreaming about as I suffered and toiled. I took my own pain and came to terms with it and my own role in it. My steps have not been wasted; even missteps are utilized for the lessons learned, so do not imagine me an angel. I am just a woman who has had a devil of a time and possesses enough talent with words to make my dream come true. I walk between the lines, never imagining failure as my final destination.
I do not fear anything with more intensity than the notion that I could ever simply become satisfied with settling in place. There is just so much left to learn, teach, and experience to allow any ruts to develop. I am driven to succeed for my own sake as well as yours. My words strengthen some and gentle others, according to their need. And they come from someplace deep and primal, because they touch me in the same fashion. I was driven to this path and the only way to fail is to abandon it.
Follow your dreams. Anyone who reads here on a regular basis and enjoys what I offer has dreams. Make them reality. If not now...when?


Sunday, November 27, 2005

Paint Your Canvas

With every experience, you alone are painting your own canvas, thought by thought, choice by choice.
Oprah Winfrey

Creating your own painting with vivid color is just as simple as it is complex. But before you begin you have to possess a clean canvas. If any other hands have slapped paint carelessly you must remove it completely before beginning to place your true colors there.
I am in the process of painting a new canvas. It will be the second one I have done since my awakening and it is breathtakingly beautiful, made bright with colors I never imagined existed when I painted my first. The old one hangs in a gallery dedicated to past triumphs, within eye view as a remainder of how far I have come since the days when I simply held it out and invited others to define its style.
How large a surface I have this time matters not as much as the hues chosen to cover it. Time is the canvas edge; this fact is certain, pondering it only shrinks its boarders without adding anything to its quality. So I hold the brush with attitude, using gentle strokes and bold. And dip in every color that takes my fancy, as I paint a portrait of hope.


Saturday, November 26, 2005

Be There

If you're here for four more years or four more weeks, you're here right now. I think when you're somewhere, you ought to be there. It's not about how long you stay in a place, it's about what you do while you're there, when you go, is that place any better for your having been there?
Karen Hall Jerry Stahl,
Northern Exposure,
Soapy Serson, 1990

The length of time your energy intertwines with a place or a person is secondary. Any intense touch will linger long after you move on. Positive or negative, the choice is yours but the echo you leave is capable of inspiring good or bad, according to how its planted and why.
I have found old shadows, forgotten and hidden that came from the hand of a man that has been dead for over two years. Most of what I struggle with now was planted long ago when I was a different person entirely. Finding it is a painful thing, dealing with it is empowering. Negatives left behind are still negative in the extreme, yet produce positives inside of me as I rid myself of their shadow.
When I leave anywhere, I seek to gift that space with vibrations so positive that whatever good I began does not depend upon my presence to keep growing. I am offended when others stomp through my territory and drop debris as they travel on. Picking up someone else's mess is always such a trial.
Consider as you go; do not just spew through life, leaving chaos behind for someone to deal with years after you cross their path. Think before you speak, the cost of your words may be much dearer than you realize. Be where you are, or go where you can be who you are without struggle. That's my plan.


Friday, November 25, 2005



Love isn't a decision. It's a feeling. If we could decide who we loved, it would be much simpler, but much less magical.
Trey Parker and Matt Stone
South Park, Chef Aid, 1998
Love is mostly wondrous. And a healthy love is much better still. But love of self is vital to the mix; without loving who you are, others will have a hard time getting a balanced view and often fill in the blanks with answers that simply do not apply.
Romance is defined as a love affair, fanciful story, or a realm of fantasy. It is easy to get lost in this place and believe it is the most important location for loving. But although you can create an atmosphere of romantic proportions to visit from time to time, real love does not only exist inside that space. True love is not easy to control with candles, flowers, and wine. True love is internal, eternal, and truly without boundaries.

Thursday, November 24, 2005

Patient Protection

Patience serves as a protection against wrongs as clothes do against cold. For if you put on more clothes as the cold increases, it will have no power to hurt you. So in like manner you must grow in patience when you meet with great wrongs, and they will then be powerless to vex your mind.
Leonardo da Vinci Italian engineer, painter, & sculptor (1452 - 1519)

Patience is a virtue that can be developed and fine tuned with practice. It is a bit like a tree, growing out of a rock, giving hope that even the most barren ground can produce life with time. But to rest there without doing anything is foolish. If you make no effort then patience is just a fairytale wasteland, where dreams only have life inside the boundaries of your own mind.
But plot a course, take a stand, implement a plan, do a deed, then sprinkle it with some patience, and let time march on and anything is possible. The limits set in life are mostly self-inflicted, in one fashion or another, so if you have to suffer impatience with anyone then practice it upon yourself first. Perfect the art of patience on your own plate, before you try feeding it to anyone else.
If I had never altered my abused state, I would still be free of it now. He died, which would have been the case either way. But I gave us both a richer life when I changed myself then had the patience to show him the map to my side. It was far from perfect, yet light years away from what had been my reality before. And I have never stopped growing since my rebirth on Oct. 30, 1993.
I have patience with all who merit it, and many who do not. I use it to my advantage always and to theirs most times. Through trial and error, I find a passage through the dark times and have the patience to still be showing the map to others. I do not bellow hurry up, or shift from foot to foot as if eager to rush on. I wait patiently, until I am certain that they at least possess some understanding of the bigger picture that my map implies. I tell them to chart their own course and travel on, secure in the knowledge that in this one thing I helped create some symmetry out of pure chaos.
Happy Thanksgiving everyone!


Wednesday, November 23, 2005

Be More

Be more splendid, more extraordinary. Use every moment to fill yourself up.
Oprah Winfrey

This quote is my hope for all who read here. And it is also my hope for myself. I make an effort to siphon every drop from all the time I have. My mind is never still; it is constantly reaching out for new information to use in mapping whatever territory it is exploring. In ways I am just beginning to understand, my mind is getting its first real education.
I focused on emotion for years, cause and effect was my major. I watched as an observer then processed what I saw to select the proper tools needed for control. I took those tools and reworked the situations in the best way to solve issues.
Then I attempted the same with physical, observing, selecting, reworking, for control. That struggle has been much more difficult, but I am well on the way through much of the reworking and do not doubt that control lurks somewhere nearby.
In the mist of it all is fear, which bars every door I need to open. My saving grace is that I am much more frightened of never getting through a door than I am of what lies on the other side. But I am slowed each time, by fear produced in a factory that others built. I do not believe that this will be a condition that will plague me forever. Simple awareness that a factory exists makes it impossible to leave it standing there in my path.
But to fill myself fully from the fountain that stands waiting just ahead, I have to first empty my head and heart of all of the unnecessary fear housed there. I have begun the process, yet have much left to do. With fright it is a given that when one blaze is put out at least two more will ignite. Fear needs us to enable it for it to exist. When it senses we are getting the better of one of its infernos it creates more to take its place. But here again awareness is the key.
Some of the best and deepest ruts are fear lined. And it is impossible to scale a high wall that is ablaze, much safer to walk in the center with a wet towel over your head, following the feet you see just ahead. To escape takes valiant effort. Facing the fire is the only way you can extinguish it, and you cannot do that with your head hidden or bowed.
Awareness is the key to all things. Knowledge places the door within your reach. So fill your mind with tools to assist you in your journey. Become as self aware as possible then keep pouring information in. I have been doing this exercise for the longest time and have only scratched the surface. But now I have acquired the need for heavier equipment and the desire to learn how to operate it.


Tuesday, November 22, 2005

Living On Gravy

To fulfill a dream, to be allowed to sweat over lonely labor, to be given the chance to create, is the meat and potatoes of life. The money is the gravy. As everyone else, I love to dunk my crust in it. But alone, it is not a diet designed to keep body and soul together.
Bette Davis
The Lonely Life,1963

A life of balance is like a bowl of soup, filled with a wide variety of flavors and textures that make it worth savoring to the last drop. Gravy is tasty, I love eating it on other things, but would never simply make a meal of it. Our systems will not function on a steady diet of sauce.
Money should be like an accessory to our wardrobe. The more wealth we have the more accessories we possess. A person would not dress in accessories alone, but a person can be fully clothed without wearing any at all.
The joy of doing something that is natural to your soul has value that money cannot equal. Priceless endeavors do not depend upon payment in coin to gain you wealth. They enrich you as go in ways that cannot be calculated by anything except an internal audit. And the more you invest the higher your return.

Passing along another great email
Breakfast at McDonald's ..
Please read until the end. This is a good story and is true, please read it all the way through until the end!
I am a mother of three (ages 14, 12, 3) and have recently completed my college degree. The last class I had to take was Sociology. The teacher was absolutely inspiring with the qualities that I wish every human being had been graced with. Her last project of the term was called "Smile."
The class was asked to go out and smile at three people and document their reactions. I am a very friendly person and always smile at everyone and say hello anyway, so, I thought this would be a piece of cake, literally.
Soon after we were assigned the project, my husband, youngest son, and I went out to McDonald's one crisp March morning. It was just our way of sharing special playtime with our son. We were standing in line, waiting to be served, when all of a sudden everyone around us began to back away, and then even my husband did. I did not move an inch... an overwhelming feeling of panic welled up inside of me as I turned to see why they had moved.
As I turned around I smelled a horrible "dirty body" smell, and there standing behind me were two poor homeless men. As I looked down at the short gentleman, close to me, he was "smiling". His beautiful sky blue eyes were full of God's Light as he searched for acceptance. He said, "Good day" as he counted the few coins he had been clutching. The second man fumbled with his hands as he stood behind his friend. I realized the second man was mentally challenged and the blue-eyed gentleman was his salvation.
I held my tears as I stood there with them. The young lady at the counter asked him what they wanted. He said, "Coffee is all Miss" because that was all they could afford. (If they wanted to sit in the restaurant and warm up, they had to buy something. He just wanted to be warm). Then I really felt it - the compulsion was so great I almost reached out and embraced the little man with the blue eyes. That is when I noticed all eyes in the restaurant were set on me, judging my every action.
I smiled and asked the young lady behind the counter to give me two more breakfast meals on a separate tray. I then walked around the corner to the table that the men had chosen as a resting spot. I put the tray on the table and laid my hand on the blue-eyed gentleman's cold hand. He looked up at me, with tears in his eyes, and said, "Thank you." I leaned over, began to pat his hand and said, "I did not do this for you. God is here working through me to give you hope."
I started to cry as I walked away to join my husband and son. When I sat down my husband smiled at me and said, "That is why God gave you to me, Honey, to give me hope." We held hands for a moment and at that time, we knew that only because of the Grace that we had been given were we able to give. We are not church goers, but we are believers.
That day showed me the pure Light of God's sweet love. I returned to college, on the last evening of class, with this story in hand. I turned in "my project" and the instructor read it. Then she looked up at me and said, "Can I share this?" I slowly nodded as she got the attention of the class. She began to read and that is when I knew that we as human beings and being part of God share this need to heal people and to be healed. In my own way I had touched the people at McDonald's, my husband, son, instructor, and every soul that shared the classroom on the last night I spent as a college student. I graduated with one of the biggest lessons I would ever learn:
Much love and compassion is sent to each and every person who may read this and learn how to LOVE PEOPLE AND USE THINGS - NOT LOVE THINGS AND USE PEOPLE.
If you think this story has touched you in any way, please send this to everyone you know. An Angel wrote: Many people will walk in and out of your life, but only true friends will leave footprints in your heart. To handle yourself, use your head. To handle others, use your heart.
God Gives every bird it's food, but He does not throw it into its nest.

Monday, November 21, 2005

The Strength Of Letting Go

Some think it's holding on that makes one strong; sometimes it's letting go.
Sylvia Robinson

Clutching is not the ideal way to maintain a strong, lasting grasp upon anything. More often than not it is a position of total desperation. And let's face it, most things are not meant to be held desperately tight.
Some people try that tactic to keep their mates and end up possessing nothing more than a hostage who escapes at the earliest opportunity. I have seen people so intent on keeping the dead alive that they give their whole life as a monument. I have seen dead horses kicked and sleeping dogs woken for senseless reasons. But clutching a lost cause will not validate its worth. It functions as a barrier, fencing us into a corner with no way out except to unclench and let go.
Fear is a doubled edged sword. Fright causes us to clench hold, but it frightens us more to let go. I decided long ago that I do not want to possess anything that requires a fisted hand to keep. I embrace things fully then step back and have enough faith in myself to let go. I am much more frightened of fences than I am of freedom. And my hands need to be always open to hook onto my dreams, not closed in a choke hold around my nightmares.


Sunday, November 20, 2005

Taming Dragons

Challenge is a dragon with a gift in its mouth.
Tame the dragon and the gift is yours.
Noela Evans

In life anything can be a dragon. What is difficult for some is effortless for others. Some follow us from childhood, while others are born as we travel along. Their size and strength varies by how much they are fed. And when ignored they plant roots and raise a family.
I work hard at taming dragons, sometimes single handedly, sometimes with assistance, but when they cannot be tamed, I slay them as quickly as possible. I have found that the ones others stuffed down my throat, long ago, are the most difficult to manage. But the empowerment earned from tossing out someone else's garbage is well worth the effort. I found that out last month, in a big way. I am learning new things daily from the prizes that spilled out of that dragons mouth, once the fire was out. Each lesson has priceless value to my growth, but some are painful in the extreme.
Sometimes I grow weary of the struggle. I could give into despair and feel sorry for myself. I could refuse to connect with all people, because of the pain caused by a few. I could grow a garden of bitterness with the seeds dropped from careless hands. I could doubt everyone because some lie. But I will not.
A dragons baggage does not belong to me. The real defect is not mine, so punishing myself would not cure it. But escorting another dragon to the boarder of my kingdom will free me to travel on in comfort. I do not hate dragons, I just do not choose to rent them any space within fire breathing distance of my soul.


Saturday, November 19, 2005

Senseless Inventions

What you don't see with your eyes, don't invent with your mouth.
Jewish Proverb

Drama needs no embellishment. Rumors only add layers, of debris, to any difficult situation. But I know people who cannot seem to help themselves. They take a grain of truth and build upon it then sell it to the masses for much more than it is worth.
What you do not see, do not invent, but what you do see, keep to yourself unless someone's safety is compromised. What we view is only the top layer, there is so much more just below the surface. Things said without understanding of what lies beneath only muck things up. Lives are destroyed every day in the name of gossip that holds little or no truth.
People share their hearts with me everyday. I know things that others would love to know, but what I know is only borrowed information. I have no right to trade it or give it away. And I have no inclination. If I told all I know or said all I think, before long nobody would be eager to speak to me, at all. Senseless inventions only make an ass out of their creator.
Why not create a positive? It seems much more practical to assist someone than to condemn them. Tend to your own shortcomings, before you try to judge someone else less than perfect. I do not aim this at anyone in particular, but if it gets you worked up thinking so, it might be because you see yourself in my words. I have no clear image of any face as I type.
I do not judge others, because I do not buy into the gossip game. If I see all as equal, then there is nobody left to talk about. I dwell in a place of concepts and ideas, not a shallow city of whispers in the shadows. It is a difficult thing to absorb the negatives of life with sunshine always beaming in your face. If it cannot be said loud enough for all ears it is not worth the effort. And nine times out of ten it is simply a senseless invention, anyway.


Friday, November 18, 2005

Dreams, Visions, And Ideals

"Dream lofty dreams, and as you dream, so you shall become. Your vision is the promise of what you shall one day be; your ideal is the prophecy of what you shall at last unveil."
James Lane Allen (1849-1923)

This quote is truer than we realize; envisioning dreams grants them life that is often undeniable once given. Lofty dreams inspire an instant urge to transform thoughts into actions. Lofty actions guarantee that tomorrow you will be further along the right path than you are today.
Catch a dream, hook yourself to it firmly with hope and faith. Do not waste time with worry about what is behind you. Whatever is past cannot overtake your position, unless you walk backwards. Take a thought, do the deed, and celebrate the reality.
Be whomever you choose today, no matter who you were yesterday. And joyfully get rid of the baggage that keeps slowing you down. Embrace the dreams that refuse to go away. Change what hurts, sort out the rest, and follow the path of your dreams to the highest point you can reach.


Thursday, November 17, 2005


"Expect people to be better than they are; it helps them to become better. But don't be disappointed when they're not; it helps them to keep trying."
Merry Browne

Expecting the best of others is a special kind of encouragement. There have been times in my life when I acted as bravely as someone else expected, when all I really wanted to do was panic.
I see the best in even the worst, and hope that others will see the best in me. Eyes that reflect pride, in what you are attempting, prod you forward past the bumpy places. A hand on your shoulder encourages a person to look up and view the next step as a positive thing. Sometimes we walk out on our own faith, at others we must step out on the faith that others have in us. Whichever bridge you use the destination is the same; you just have someone to celebrate with when a friends belief gets you to the other side.

I got the following from a friend. I hope you enjoy.

The following is the philosophy of Charles Schultz, the creator of the "Peanuts" comic strip. You don't have to actually answer the questions. Just read straight through, and you'll get the point.

1. Name the five wealthiest people in the world.

2. Name the last five Heisman trophy winners.

3. Name the last five winners of the Miss America.

4. Name ten people who have won the Nobel or Pulitzer Prize.

5. Name the last half dozen Academy Award winner for best actor and actress.
6. Name the last decade's worth of World Series winners.

How did you do?

The point is, none of us remember the headliners of yesterday. These are no second-rate achievers. They are the best in their fields. But the applause dies. Awards tarnish. Achievements are forgotten. Accolades and certificates are buried with their owners.

Here's another quiz. See how you do on this one:
1. List a few teachers who aided your journey through school.

2. Name three friends who have helped you through a difficult time.

3. Name five people who have taught you something worthwhile.

4. Think of a few people who have made you feel appreciated and special.

5. Think of five people you enjoy spending time with.


The lesson: The people who make a difference in your life are not the ones with the most credentials, the most money, or the most awards. They are the ones that care.

"Don't worry about the world coming to an end today. It's already tomorrow in Australia." (Charles Schultz)

Wednesday, November 16, 2005

Keeping Pace With Your Own Music

If a man does not keep pace with his companions, perhaps it is because he hears a different drummer. Let him step to the music which he hears, however measured or far away.
Henry David Thoreau, 1817-1862
American Essayist/Poet/Naturalist

Every soul gives off special vibrations, and each heart produces a unique rhythm that the mind just naturally writes the lyrics for. But all too often, we allow the hustle and bustle of life to mute the special music composed for our ears alone. And if we cannot tune it in, we miss out on so much comfort and joy.
Children hear it without knowing what it means, while adults know what it means but are too busy or downtrodden to pay attention. Elders grow so serious they forget that internal treasures can be discovered, or rediscovered if need be, whenever we seek them out in an active way. And the reward is always well worth any effort applied.
Invest a bit of time in yourself. Find your drumbeat, close your eyes, and absorb its rhythm. Meet your inner child and invite them to dance, without caring if it appears foolish to outsiders, because it comes so naturally to you. Do not simply be satisfied to line dance with the masses, echoing movements choreographed by others. Keep pace with your own music and sway in your own way.


Tuesday, November 15, 2005

A Rule Of Life

Make it a rule of life never to regret and never to look back. Regret is an appalling waste of energy; you can't build on it; it's only for wallowing in.
Katherine Mansfield, 1888-1923
New Zealand Short Story Author

This quote mirrors my mind set, and the photo echoes how I visualize past and future. Both were chosen because I delight in going deeper than surface level.
My display message, on MSN is, 'Je ne regrette rien', which means I regret nothing. I have had it up there for well over a year and it has become a touch stone for me. Reading it always reminds me that dwelling on things from another lifetime will only spoil the one I am living now. And for me every day is a little lifetime.
I am a bit like the girl in the window, except I am on my feet, facing the future. The darkness all around is like the past. Any attention aimed toward it would illuminate, dimming the brightness of the future. Regret would force me to relive things I already struggled through. And to what aim? Nothing can be altered. Being heavy hearted and empty handed at the same time is unpleasant, but to willingly place yourself in that position is criminal.
I know people who wallow, and I do not wish to be numbered among their group. Why embrace agony so tightly that no joy can penetrate? Why dig in a wound to keep it bleeding? Why waste a minute regretting the moments you already wasted? Why turn your back on the future to relive the past?


Monday, November 14, 2005

Your Opinions

Fight for your opinions, but do not believe that they contain the whole truth, or the only truth.
Charles A. Dana, 1819-1897
American Newspaper Editor

Our opinions have to be balanced carefully. Imagining them to be any more or any less important than anyone else's is a road that leads nowhere. One signals an over-inflated ego. The other signals low self-esteem. And without control, an unbalanced opinion can do damage that takes years to repair.
I used to dread even having an opinion; it seemed not worth the trouble, when every word I said was a possible invitation for a verbal attack. After just a few oral assaults, I learned not to say what I really felt about anything.
Words not spoken piled up, building walls I stayed hidden behind for years. When all of that stunted space was filled, I learned to care about less. I gave up, with much relief, my human right to draw a conclusion and do something based on my own thought processes. Caring about anything only gave another weapon to someone who seemed intent on my destruction.
I came as close to being totally dead inside that any person can without being a zombie. The thoughts that exploded inside my mind on October 30, 1993 saved my life, reclaimed my brain, and changed my value of both his opinion and my own. My low self-esteem went to war with his over-inflated ego, and I was armed with 20 years of unsaid words.
I suddenly gloried in having an opinion and voicing it. I never demanded that he adopt them as his own, but I did demand that he allow me to state them, without punishment. I was very aware of how each person comes to conclusions from their own unique vantage point and I was interested in trading views, when we shared opinions. And more often than not, once that was done, our opinions were close enough to quickly compromise somewhere in the middle.


Sunday, November 13, 2005

Thought Makes Knowledge Our Own

Reading furnishes the mind only with materials of knowledge; it is thinking that makes what we read ours.
John Locke, 1632-1704
English Philosopher

I read all the time, but unless I invite something to take up residence, inside my brain, it just passes on through, leaving only a faint impression behind that fades with time. But if I linger over something and assign it some space to build upon, it instantly takes root.
I study things that peak my interest, one bare fact links itself to another, automatically designing a special room where I can visit and contemplate in ease. I carefully consider its dimensions and furnishings, noting what needs added or rearranged to more perfectly suit a personal hunger I have for symmetry of the mind.
A natural flow of thought is comforting to me. Those quiet rooms, each with its own special decor, keep me centered inside the boundaries of the knowledge they hold. Clearer thoughts are possible in an orderly house, and that is how I see the collection of quiet rooms of knowledge inside my mind. Symmetry is a powerful aid to a tidy home.
You do not put a bed in the kitchen, or install a dishwasher in the bathroom. Having the forethought to separate knowledge that you wish to own into different locations gives an instant sense of ownership. And the bigger the home you own inside yourself, the better. The space available is limitless, making use of every inch only makes good sense.

Note to friend in need: I am there; in all the ways that matter, I stand beside you now and always. Trust that what you asked for is already there with more coming in all the time, even though you cannot feel it. My thoughts linger on you and the positive energy of those thoughts belongs to you. One breath at a time and one footstep, no matter how small will soon get you past this bumpy time.
Please understand how bright you are, self aware, valuable, and more complete than you realize. Repair what you have control of, one single thing at a time, sugar. Looking at it all at once is overwhelming and self defeating.
I do not need to find a way to knock down barriers with you, since I have a key to the door you stand behind. True sisterhood inspires complete understanding between its members. In joy or sorrow, we share and grow together. No walls, self built or otherwise, can bar entrance to any positive seed, lovingly planted in the secret garden of a sisters soul. Feel free to use my bootstraps, until you can find your own. Love you, more than words can express.


Saturday, November 12, 2005

Delicious Ambiguity

Life is about not knowing, having to change, taking the moment and making the best of it, without knowing what's going to happen next. Delicious ambiguity.
Gilda Radner, 1946-1989, American Actress and comedian

As is my habit, I opened my dictionary to find a clear definition of ambiguity. Webster says: 1-an expression whose meaning cannot be determined from its context 2-unclearness by virtue of having more than one meaning. And that could mean anything or nothing at all.

But life is like that, if you think about it. To find joy in living through it, both the bad and good, just for the thrill it gives, without wallowing in what it all means is a wonderful stress reliever. And doing whatever must be done to own your space, makes everything around you magical. I learned the hard way that any attention directed toward something larger than my own stunted space changes the meaning of all things, sweetening the whole. Trying to alter fate is pointless. Shit is bound to happen, that is just a given.
Fighting the current keeps us weakened, but drifting in the natural flow of things is a comfortable way to get to safety. Changing is like a graduation from one point in your life to the next, a human right of passage, yet we struggle against it too. I would much rather be a butterfly than a moth, but without a transformation that process would never occur.
I do not seek to know what happens next. But I will be alert to its approach. I find the silver in even the darkest cloud, because that is where I focus my attention. One small beam of light is enough to hold my gaze, blocking out most of the shadows. Where you train your eyes to go is where your mind will linger, so look for the glow.

The letter below came to me as an email. I left it as it was for all who want to use copy and paste to send it on. I hope you enjoy it as much as I did.

'I Hope You Dance... '
This was written by an 83-year-old woman to her friend.

Dear Bertha,
I'm reading more and dusting less. I'm sitting in the yard and admiring the view without fussing about the weeds in the garden. I'm spending more time with my family and friends and less time working.
Whenever possible, life should be a pattern of experiences to savor, not to endure. I'm trying to recognize these moments now and cherish them.
I'm not "saving" anything; we use our good china and crystal for every special event such as losing a pound, getting the sink unstopped, or the first Amaryllis blossom.
I wear my good blazer to the market. My theory is if I look prosperous, I can shell out $28.49 for one small bag of groceries. I'm not saving my good perfume for special parties, but wearing it for clerks in the hardware store and tellers at the bank.
"Someday" and "one of these days" are losing their grip on my vocabulary. If it's worth seeing or hearing or doing, I want to see and hear and do it now.
I'm not sure what others would've done had they known they wouldn't be here for the tomorrow that we all take for granted. I think they would have called family members and a few close friends. They might have called a few former friends to apologize and mend fences for past squabbles. I like to think they would have gone out for a Chinese dinner or for whatever their favorite food was.
I'm guessing; I'll never know.
It's those little things left undone that would make me angry if I knew my hours were limited. Angry because I hadn't written certain letters that I intended to write one of these days. Angry and sorry that I didn't tell my husband and parents often enough how much I truly love them. I'm trying very hard not to put off, hold back, or save anything that would add laughter and luster to our lives. And every morning when I open my eyes, tell myself that it is special.
Every day, every minute, every breath truly is a gift from God.
If you received this, it is because someone cares for you. If you're too busy to take the few minutes that it takes right now to forward this, would it be the first time you didn't do the little thing that would make a difference in your relationships? I can tell you it certainly won't be the last.
Take a few minutes to send this to a few people you care about, just to let them know that you're thinking of them.
"People say true friends must always hold hands, but true friends don't need to hold hands because they know the other hand will always be there."
Life may not be the party we hoped for, but while we are here we might as well dance.

Friday, November 11, 2005



Striving for excellence motivates you; striving for perfection is demoralizing.
Harriet Braiker, American Psychologist and Management Consultant

Perfection is an unattainable concept, everything and everyone on earth is flawed in some fashion. But striving for excellence is the flame that ignites the blaze of imagination. One hand holding the flame, one heart perfectly tuned to its image can build a fire under it that will bring it to life.
Holding out for perfection is a fools pastime. And thinking you will ever reach it is a sure sign of an inflated ego. Being human enough to have flaws is more realistic than hoping for a state that does not even exist. The little imperfections give things character they would not possess if they were flawless.
I do my best to make this space as perfect as possible, yet it is far from that. But misspelled words or punctuation marks that are misplaced or misused show just how human I am. I will never be perfect, but what and who I am is special and my flaws are part of me too, it is pointless to pretend they do not exist.
I am in the midst of trying to revamp this space with more content. The photos are new, and other ideas are floating around my crowded brain. Any ideas of things you would like to see here would be most appreciated.


Thursday, November 10, 2005

Possessing A Kingdom

A good mind possesses a kingdom.
Seneca, 3 B.C. - 65 A.D.
Roman Philosopher/Statesman/Dramatist

The kingdom of the mind is a territory that belongs to whoever rules it. I rule mine, but have given some power to others, from time to time. The limit of their power is much different nowadays than it was long ago. The fact that it took twenty years to wrestle control away from a tyrant makes it hard for me to let all the strings go at one time, which is a positive thing, to say the least.
The beauty of your kingdom does not only depend upon who rules it, but also by what rules it. I have a better hold upon those reins than ever before, and suspect this is just the tip of the iceberg. I hunger for a kingdom free from anything that will bind me to narrow minded ideas and concepts.
I do not gossip, so there is no trash blowing around of that sort, but I do have my demons like every human. The difference is that I wrestle them with all my might when necessary. There was a time when I just drifted where sensations dictated, but now I know that to be the wrong approach to satisfy the urge I have to be more than ordinary.
Some think me naive, yet that is very far from the truth. I know evil and meanness is a part of life. I realize some humans live their whole life by manipulating others to do their bidding. I know that the internet makes this all too easy. I recognize that I am often drawn to people who are less than honest with me, but I also see clearly that they are dishonest with themselves also.
I see under things, viewing people more fully than most do. I feel the torment of some and my longing to ease it somehow makes me all the more gentle with them. I try not to encourage bad behavior, but I stop short of preaching in a way that inspires them to close their ears to what I do say. I do not judge people guilty, I judge them human and let them know this.
I have been played before; there is no shame in being a victim, unless you willingly allow that condition to continue. The defect is in the player, unless you enable them. A person who cannot function without deceit is never a part of my kingdom for long. Words said to manipulate or placate only work so long before they show themselves to be empty and barren.
What I stuff into my brain is mostly positive. What I give to others is mostly positive too. My kingdom is at hand, and its beauty depends on the brightness of my soul. And in this I think I am safe enough to say with confidence that my kingdom will be a place worth living in and inviting others to visit. I hope you can say the same.


Wednesday, November 09, 2005

One Smile

If you have only one smile in you, give it to the people you love. Don't be surly at home, then go out in the street and start grinning 'Good morning' at total strangers.
Maya Angelou, American Poet and Writer

I went to high school with a classmate I will never forget. I remember his face vividly, and his name has never been misplaced, although many others slipped my mind years ago. He was not a close friend. I was never in love with him, not even a little. He was real easy on the eyes, but that was not the focus of his appeal. It was his smile. Huge, white, real, and radiant. And it belonged to the masses.
Randy wore the same look no matter who he looked at. His face was like a mighty beacon. And his energy flowed like a soothing balm. I often watched as he strolled along the hallways, but it was not him that I noticed, it was the onlookers and their reaction that held me spellbound.
He did not wear his smile like a mask. He was not selling anything; he gave the gift of ease to everyone who gazed at him, and he did it duty free. I never doubted his sincerity. And I never received a smile that I did not return. I was not alone in this response. He had a way of making each person believe, for just a moment, that he smiled especially for them.
At nineteen, I moved across the street from his parents. His mother wore a similar look, and her pride in him was evident enough for me to quickly realize that he was the real deal, through and through. Randy Hornburger, wherever you are, I see your smile still, and find ease in the magical echo it left behind.


Tuesday, November 08, 2005

My Country

The world is my country, all mankind are my brethren, and to do good is my religion.
Thomas Paine, 1737-1809, English-born Pamphleteer ("Common Sense") and Founding Father of the United States

We are all in a position to give something to one another. We all inhabit the Earth, which makes us relation in the family of man. Give what you can and receive the blessings it inspires. A hand grasping at survival will find yours if you just hold it outstretched.
Hope is here for any who have need. The priceless gift of a ready smile is waiting just for the unwrapping. Ears turned to a hyper pitch, listen from this quiet place. Small step are applauded, larger ones celebrated, inside the limitless space of Journey's End. Love is alive here, so siphon off what is needed from this well that will never run dry. No heart need suffer from hunger for comfort.
Find your place on this planet. Walk your road with as much kindness as you can produce. Plant it deep and watch it multiply. Do not be fair weather friends to one another, help the wounded to their feet, next time it just might be you who needs a hand up.

I received this as an email. People often send me things that end up here. It's a bit long, but well worth the read and worthy of careful contemplation.

Dear Frank,
I am one of the hundreds of thousands who were affected by Hurricane Katrina. I would like to share with you my personal experiences. I own a small restaurant/deli in Gautier, Mississippi. I purchased it about three months prior to the storm as an investment. (Who knew that an "investment" would require a 20-hour a daytime commitment?) At any rate, my small community had been wonderful about supporting this endeavor prior to the storm. And the citizens here have always been caring, hard working people who truly care about each other.
When the storm hit and I saw the devastation, I quickly realized that no one was going to be able to cook the foods purchased prior to the storm because most of them no longer had a home to cook it in, a stove to cook it on, pans to cook it in, or power to be able to cook. I too, had lost electricity, but had propane tanks that powered my grill, deep fryers, oven and cook top. I had packed all of my freezers and coolers with ice prior to the storm so that other than seafood and chicken, I had plenty of food that was safe to cook.
So I did what I do best, I began to cook. I also decided that money was going to be in scarce supply for my fellow citizens, so I offered food free. I made plate "dinners" that had a meat entree, one or two veggies, bread, tea and dessert, or a casserole type of entree and began serving it out the front door about ten thirty AM each day. I was feeding between three hundred and four hundred and fifty people each day. Frank, at no time did I ever encounter people pushing and shoving, breaking in line or fighting over the food.
They would line up, (some walking to the place because they lost their vehicles) and make small talk between themselves until it was their turn to receive their plates. I saw people giving to others whatever they had left that someone else desperately needed. I saw people offer whatever type of housing they had left to those who were living and sleeping on the ground. (Some wound up with nineteen folks living with them!) I saw people (usually with pick up trucks) load up their vehicle with people who had no transportation and then take them back to where they were currently "living". I saw a community where people who had virtually nothing left, selflessly give what they did have. This was prior to the Red Cross, Salvation Army or any governmental entity realized that my community even existed, much less begin to help.
Eventually, I ran out of food and money. I had used not only all of the funds in my company checking account, but my personal account as well. I vividly remember the Friday night when I doled out the last plate of food I possessed. I went home and tried to sleep but sleep was elusive. I came back to my place of business and was having one of those moments where seniors begin to talk to themselves. (We ALL know about those moments, especially those of us who live alone. I do have a dog, but for some reason, he refuses to enter into my one-person dialogs.)
At any rate, while it was not meant as a prayer, I said out loud, "Lord, how am I going to feed these people today?" (By now, it was a little after midnight.) Exactly thirty minutes later, He gave me His answer.
A pick up hauling a twenty-five trailer pulled in to the parking lot. Out hopped two men who told me that they were from Liberty, Texas and that they had a few items in their truck. May the Lord forgive me Frank, I thought to myself that they were vultures who had purchased much needed stuff and had planned to sell it at inflated prices from said truck!
However, I had just counted out all of the change in my cash register drawer and knew that I had nine dollars on me. I asked if they had some fresh meat I could buy, thinking that maybe I could add some rice or other starchy veggie to it and somehow stretch it enough to feed my community. "Yes" one of them answered and I then politely inquired how much it was.
He looked at me and replied, "Ma'am, you don't seem to understand. EVERYTHING on this truck is for you and the community. Free."I honestly thought I was having a wonderful dream and would wake up at any moment. I mean, why would two men I never met in my life suddenly show up and answer my desperate prayer?
Well, they then showed me why. They flung open the doors to the trailer and it was virtually crammed with not only fresh meat and veggies, but much needed diapers, baby foods, personal care items, bleach and other cleaning supplies, but impossible to get gasoline as well! And they began to unload it into my place!
These two Angels were from a church in Liberty, Texas who had put out the call to their congregation for help. And help they did. It seems that one of their church members had family in my town and told these men to take the stuff to my place for it was known as the local community center and everyone would go there.
I hate to admit it, but I was crying by the time they finished unloading Frank. Happy tears. Grateful tears. Tears of wonderment and tears of pride that I lived in a country that no matter what our political, social or economic differences are, will come together to help in times of trial. And it gets even better Frank.
A family member in Florida had put the word out on the Internet what I had been doing and about two weeks later, (just about the time I was once again running out of foods) trucks began arriving from all over our wonderful country. Trucks filled with clothing, foods, both canned and fresh, baby items, tents, linens and everything else one needs in a disaster.
While my community was hit hard, it is the absolute truth that with the help and aid of all of the wonderful angels in this country, we were able to survive our disaster in a much more comfortable manner. Naturally, we are but one of hundreds of thousands of small communities that were hit. But most shocking to me was that our community would never see CNN or President Bush here, yet through miracles and the Internet we have been taken care of.
Oh how I wish that EVERY small community like us had been given the miracles and angels we have. Of course, by now they have had the governmental help that eventually came to my community as well. But I surely wish they had the early help we had.
I know this e-mail is long, but I just wanted you to know that I now know angels are real. I have seen them, hugged them, thanked them, laughed (and cried) with them and prayed with them. Those angels are American citizens, American churches, and American children.
And I am just so delighted that I live among them Frank. What a wonderful country we have! No disaster or terrorist could EVER take away what makes this country so great Frank. And that is the American Spirit. They might bomb us; they might attempt to destroy us through chemical or biological weapons or terror. But they will not ever crush this spirit and willingness to come together and do whatever is necessary to rebuild life, communities and/or the greatest gift of all, hope.
Just sign me as one who is proud to be an American.
Sunny Wilson,Owner of Robin's Deli
7504 Martin Bluff Road
Gautier, MS 39553
Sunny would welcome to hear from you. She is at


Monday, November 07, 2005

Blessed Influence

Blessed is the influence of one true, loving human soul on another.
George Eliot, 1819-1880, English Female Novelist (pen name of Mary Ann Evans)

The impact of touch is immeasurable. A hug can comfort. A kiss can heal. But the touch of soul energy can reach further and do more than any other kind of touch. Energy given with loving intent fills all the empty places and soothes even the fiercest pain. Positive soul-embraces instantly calm panic and deflate fear.
Love someone enough to bless them with a gentle soul touch. Who knows if you are fortunate the energy will be returned and each soul will be blessed by the connection. By giving you receive and both souls feed at a banquet that satisfies the hungers of portions of themselves too often ignored.


Sunday, November 06, 2005

Wise Doubt

Doubt is often the beginning of wisdom.
Dr. M. Scott Peck (b. 1936)

Doubt produces questions that pester the brain into demanding answers, which inspires knowledge and gains wisdom. There have been times that doubt kept me from making a mistake. But there have also been times when doubt has kept me from moving forward, finding a balance is necessary or you end up being ruled by a skeptic.
Believing nothing is equally as tragic an outlook as believing everything. I believe first then if doubt comes I usually manage to look at it more objectively than I would if I simply handed it out beforehand. Most of my runaway emotions are produced by doubt. And I hate to be a slave to negatives like doubt and the fear it inspires. Some may think me naive. But I would rather rest in belief than wallow in doubt.
I get disappointed, from time to time, but never in myself. The time I suffer is shortened by the fact that it is another persons baggage and not my own to carry. If I view you as trustworthy then give you my trust and you violate it I am not the guilty party and if I travel on a bit wiser, all the better.