Thursday, February 09, 2006

Complete Revenge

There is no revenge so complete as forgiveness.
Josh Billings US Humorist (1818 - 1885)

I forgive wrongs, it takes time sometimes and effort always yet I have found that to withhold forgiveness means you have to embrace the emotions inspired by the wrong. You have to build a fire under them to keep intensity constant or add fuel to allow it to boil over. And exploding once is not always enough to guarantee an end to it. Holding it close and reheating it seems too much trouble for something that makes a person feel so dreadful.
I also hope that being forgiving to others will encourage them to do the same for me. I make plenty of mistakes too and could use being graded on a curve from time to time. It would be much harder for me to forgive myself if I did spiteful things to avenge a wrong than it is to pardon them. And reactionary actions promote a cycle of bitch slapping that would end badly if it ever ended at all.
I do not forgive with any conscious thought of it being revenge. And I do not hope for anything so negative to come from a positive. I would rather my actions make them pause to consider the cost to themselves of holding firmly to a grudge against someone who refuses to assist them to hold it erect.