Sunday, January 23, 2005

Dear Anonymous

Yes, my heart has been broken, countless times, actually. For twenty years I suffered from almost daily heartache. But I finally wised up and stomped away, resolute not to be a willing victim anymore. My husband followed me and for a time life was great.
Then he got cancer...And my heart broke every day for him....And for me.....And for his children....And for his grandchildren. And then he died, inspiring more heart break of a different shade and depth.
Hearts are broken in varying ways. Some pain is sharp and quick and drives you instantly to your knees. Some ache in a way that simply leaves you numb. Some blindsides, sneaking up when you are unaware and causes noisy tears, or silent agony, or sounds of an animal nature from soul deep places. I understand pain well, for a lifetime its been my almost constant companion. But joy lives here too. And hope, and love of life, and hunger to do more than simply take up precious space.
Heartbreak causes change when we let it. It warns of danger when we heed it. It teaches valuable lessons when we validate it. I travel past my pain by letting it help me grow. I share my pain to help others pass theirs. I have learned more about joy from the heartaches of my life than from the happy times. My life is good now, but it did not unfold without effort.
Pain is what made me irate enough to grow a backbone. Pain is what forged me strong enough to not settle for less than I deserve now. I earned every good thing that happens from now on. It is my lifepath to encourage others to find happiness within themselves in spite of life's heartbreaks. I know it is possible, I live it every day.
Thank you for your question, interaction makes this place larger, expanding my reach in a way not possible if I just yadda, yadda, yadda alone. Sincerly, Glenda