Monday, June 12, 2006

Anger is the real destroyer of our good human qualities; an enemy with a weapon cannot destroy these qualities, but anger can. Anger is our real enemy.
His Holiness the Dalai Lama

Anger is defined as belligerence aroused by a real or supposed wrong (personified as one of the deadly sins). Living with it is akin to having cancer of the soul. The negative emotions it inspires eat away healthy tissue until a mental collapse becomes certain. It's important to remember that any negative emotion does the most harm to the person feeling it. You're more likely to inspire positive emotions inside of a foe with any ire they inspire. Hell, I never promised any of this would make perfect sense or be fair in any fashion. Sometimes it simply is what it is and settling on a reality we don't agree with is the medicine that must be swallowed. Take heart that it doesn't have to end with your surrender. But the karma connection comes later... for now let's just focus on the hard parts.

The fact is that most people you actively hate get more pleasure out of the agony it brings to you than anything else. It always pesters my brain to the boiling point that hating them pleases them somehow. That notion alone is enough to make me drop it like it's hot. The last emotion I'd ever want to inspire in anyone I'm irritated with is pleasure. Let them get their cheap thrills at someone else's expense. Seems to me that whatever they did to cause any displeasure in the first place is plenty enough pain to feel from one source.

Being angry at a situation does no good either; it just makes the hardship grow until it's so huge it overwhelms your good sense. If anger solved anything, welcoming it with open arms would be a no-brainer. Impotent rage inspires rapid growth of any obstacle to an even greater height, making it all but impossible to overcome. Don't get me wrong... I believe there are many things worthy of anger. But fighting fire with fire only increases the height of the inferno. Recognize them as the arsonist and view yourself as the firefighter. Assign yourself a positive role or they'll force you into a costume of their choice.

Words used a weapons only compound the problem. When two people are both screaming then nobody's listening. Don't feed the monster or he may end up eating you. When anger is dwelled upon in that fashion it makes it harder to find a solution or accept reality if no solution is possible. Sometimes leaving the battlefield is the only sane way to end the war. That won't make you a coward; it takes real guts to turn your back on a lunatic. Allow them to imagine they gained a victory. When you do the right thing for the right reason what does it matter what a bully believes? 

Learn to feel it when it's valid then let it go and move on. Change it if possible, accept it if not, but to allow it to rule your actions or ruin your life is a total waste of precious time and energy. It scatters thoughts as surely as if a bomb exploded inside of our brain. It keeps all wounds seeping. It breaks hearts and shrivels souls. It's like quicksand, sucking us under with such speed that there's no time or energy for escape. Don't follow a fool into bad behavior for the sake of a truth they'll never accept. Be a leader!!!

We all wish the world were a gentler place; doing what we can to make that happen should be a priority. I know that to make my portion of it less brutal, I must let go of the negatives. If you lay down your anger and turn it over to a higher hand to sort out then your surrounding are instantly gentler. This is where karma shows it's lovely face. When you insists on continuing the war past this point you end up reaping whatever you deserve. Lay it at God's feet then get out of His way. Only a fool tries to micromanage past this point. You may never see the result of His judgment, but never doubt there'll be one. Stop looking for justice served and focus on the benefits inside of your own personal space. You don't have to wait to view the good that comes; it's instant, it's soul-deep, and it's completely empowering.