Sunday, March 26, 2006

A Better Friend

One who knows how to show and to accept kindness will be a friend better than any possession.

Friendships are almost magical in the amount of comfort and support they bring and friends are not simply driven to put up with each other because of an accident of birth. Nobody hand-picked me for daughter, or sister, and my children certainly did not have a choice in their mother. I sometimes wonder who among my relatives would exchange me for someone more ordinary or main stream if given the chance. I wonder if any of them would fight to keep me just as I am.
Friends seek each other out because of love, not duty. They listen as much or more than they talk and what they say is never spitefully meant, although hard truths are never off limits. Loving is a pleasure not a burden. Missing a friend is a bit like losing a part of self, not just a nagging irritation.
The unconditional love of a true friend is beyond priceless. In times of trouble they give comfort and ask few questions. When we are wrong they love us anyway, never rubbing our nose in the mistake or glorying over being right. My best friend says I told you so only when it can be laughed about by both of us, and I do not think I have ever said it to her.
The brutal times of my life have been inhabited by gentle friendships that helped me long after family had gone back to their own routine. I am blessed with steadfast friendships. Family is wonderful, but ready made before you arrive; friends are the gravy, home-made seasoned to suit your taste, adding flavor to every meal you share. Have a banquet, toast a friendship, and love unconditionally.