Thursday, September 29, 2005

The Tyrant Within / Click To Donate

The only tyrant I accept in this world is the still voice within.
Mahatma Gandhi (1869-1948)

The word tyrant is somewhat repulsive to me. Webster says it means a harsh arbitrary ruler, which I cannot assign, in any fashion, to the voice that echoes from my soul. I lived with a tyrant for twenty years and his voice was a mighty roar that froze me in place for years.
My souls voice is sometimes stern, but the things it tells me are always worded gently enough not to cause panic. I am never frozen in place by what I hear there, more often than not I am spurred forward, which is their true purpose. A tyrant is a master with an agenda not always in balance with what is good for the territory ruled, and balance is an important key to peace in any kingdom.
Arbitrary means unreasonable, or unjustified, admitting no discussion or complaint. Heavens, that brings back a ton of examples, better left in the long ago. But in no way does my soul demand what is not reasonable or just, and I often have quiet discussions asking for guidance or clarity.
I do not agree with the use of tyrant in this quote, but I certainly agree with using that voice as a guide. For forty years, I never heard the beautiful echoing symphony of my inner voice. All I knew was the clashing of many voices, never my own, filling my mind with confusion. Pleasing others was my only aim, and since the demands kept changing I was constantly off balance.
While I suffered, my soul listened, recording all lessons for future reference. If I had never cleared my head of all tyrants, I suppose that would have been a mute point, when all was said and done. All the answers would have remained untapped and undeserved, all the suffering gaining nothing positive. But I did hear finally, and I make a point of staying in close contact with what rests deep inside.
When I write here, my hands rest on the keyboard and my voice tells them what to type, at times I am even surprised by things that are said here. Knowing deep down is different from facing things eye-to-eye, so in a real way I learn, as much as anyone else, from this exercise.
If you have never heard your inner voice then find it, everyone has one, often it is just buried under bullshit that does not even belong to you. If you lost the peace it takes to really listen, search for it. That voice is as much a part of us as our heart or brain, in fact, our real being is housed there. And sometimes it takes being real to find your real being.