Journey's End

Dancing Without Music

2006-07-14T11:17:00.000-07:00

TODAY'S QUOTE:
"He that lives in hope danceth without music."
George Herbert

Hope is like music, it feeds the soul in such a satisfying way. It has a tempo that keeps our feet marching, even through the most brutal terrain. Without hope we become listless and overwhelmed by even the slightest irritations. And life is irritating in the extreme... but it is also precious enough to treasure by wrapping it with hope, when things are less than perfect.
And...face it folks...less than perfect is how everything is. But hope smoothes the bumpy patches. It gives breath to the winded. It straightens crooked backs and winding thoughts. It is all we have sometimes, but it is always enough to get us across even the widest of chasms if we allow it to lift us up.
I always hope for a better tomorrow, and see the best in even the darkest today. I view hardship as a challenge and sorrow as a lesson that I must master before I can move on. Opportunities are not all dressed in party clothes, some are ragged and tattered. When I feel naked and exposed, I simply wrap myself with hope and dance forward at whatever pace is possible.

THINK ABOUT IT

LET IT GROW

THEN DECIDE

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Calmness

2006-07-13T11:14:00.000-07:00

TODAY'S QUOTE:
"Calmness is the cradle of power."
Josiah Gilbert Holland

The ability to stay calm no matter what you are facing is very hard to master. With me it is an ongoing battle, sometimes I win... sometimes not, but I always try my best to not add to the insanity around me with any of my own. I have noticed that when I keep my balance it seems to help others retain theirs.
Doing it for the peace of the majority is a good reason to exercise it when I am tempted to unravel. When no other excuse is handy, I use that one as encouragement. Panic only adds fuel to any blaze; it is much easier to smother the flames with a peaceful attitude than it is to stop, drop, and roll once you are on fire.
The power of calm touches those closest to you in the most soothing way. It eases even the most brutal of worries in our lifetimes. When my husband was dying he was much less tormented by fear when I was cheerful and happy. A lot of the time it was an act for his benefit, but it was a small price to pay to see him relax inside the serene setting I created. Adding to his terror... by sharing my own would have been unfair, since there was nothing he could do to ease mine.
Being as calm as possible makes solutions easier to sort out. It inspires hope in even the most hopeless situations. Life takes its toll on each of us, giving it more than it demands is foolhardy. Using the power of serenity as fuel will get you through most anything. Panic only makes us run in tight circles, when the fastest way through the darkness is a straight shot toward the light.

THINK ABOUT IT

LET IT GROW

THEN DECIDE

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The Power

2006-07-12T11:12:00.000-07:00

TODAY'S QUOTE:
"The power of one is above all things the power to believe in yourself. Often well beyond any latent ability previously demonstrated. The mind is the athlete, the body is simply the means it uses."
Bryce Courtenay

Possession or use of this power is not automatic; some have very little confidence in their judgment or belief in themselves, but it can be built up with exercise. The critical things other people say can affect our equilibrium, yet more often than not it is the critic in the mirror that does the most lasting damage. Training that voice to use encouragement instead of criticism is no walk in the park, but allowing negative reinforcement to be the navigator will guarantee a brutal journey to nowhere nice.
Why concentrate upon everything that is wrong? Any dark picture that is stared at will only grow bleaker unless some light is shown on its surface. Looking at just the negatives over-shadows the positives until forgetting that they even exist is all too effortless. Gazing at the good will not make the bad disappear, but it makes the next battle less overwhelming.
And battle we must, whether we want to or not. The bloodiest battlefield is often the one where we war with ourselves. Losing there can and will set up failures elsewhere. Blaming others for the things you are determined to hold soul-deep is as asinine and senseless as constructing a bomb, arming it then sitting smack dab on top to watch it explode.
Time would be better spent in building a bomb shelter. The most protection from life's explosions comes from the power a person grows inside. A healthy garden there begins with healthy seeds and the better weeded it is the more nourishment it will produce.

THINK ABOUT IT

LET IT GROW

THEN DECIDE

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A Spectacular Goal

2006-07-11T11:08:00.000-07:00

TODAY'S QUOTE:
You may get skinned knees and elbows, but it's worth it if you score a spectacular goal.
Mia Hamm, American Soccer Player

Knees and elbows will heal, but the opportunity to score a spectacular goal may never present itself again. Some things are once in a lifetime possibilities, if not met full force you may be sitting on the sidelines regretting that you missed the chance. It is much easier to swallow a defeat than it is to suffer through years of what if's, and if the only thing standing in your was is you....better move and find out what happens next.
It is not always the fear of failure that keeps us from giving it our best shot, sometimes the thought of success can be much more terrifying. But to not attempt at all is admitting that you see yourself as unworthy, and negative thinking can derail even the best of intentions.
Rigid people are never happy, life has a bend and flow that they never master. Rigid thinking is all hard lines and it keeps us imprisoned in a place where the brass ring is well out of reach. Never stop trying for something better, richer, or more fulfilling than what you possess right now. You may be battered and bloody at the end of the battle, but even if you do not score a spectacular goal, trying is a victory all on its own.

THINK ABOUT IT

LET IT GROW

THEN DECIDE

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Quit Pretending

2006-07-10T14:46:00.000-07:00

TODAY'S QUOTE:
"Life can be lived more fully if people simply quit pretending to be who they were told to be, and be who they really are…"
Doug Firebaugh

I spent 40 years trying to please loved ones, dancing to whatever rhythm they chose to play on my heart strings. I was rarely rewarded with anything except a changed song whenever I came too close to getting the steps right. When their objective was to keep me constantly off-balance that was how I constantly stayed.

I do not dance much anymore, unless I am the one spinning the tunes.

I still have a hunger to please... that is simply part of my nature. I just learned the hard-ass way that if the tempo does not match my own it is much better to be a wall-flower than it is to trip the light fantastic with a puppeteer. The knowledge I gleamed from 40 years of dancing lessons is invaluable to my mental health and emotional happiness.

I know things, learned in brutal ways, that have emancipated me from the special prison of CONDITIONAL love. I am certain of many things now that eluded me in my youth. Hard knock school has its true rewards and freedom is one of its highest honors. Living in certainty is so much better than settling for being eternally clueless.

Some of my favorite certainties are as follows:

Anyone who truly loves me will not seek to alter the very things that make me who I am.

I am not a blank canvas, to be painted on by other artists.

I am a masterpiece of my own creation.

Each of us can claim a masterpiece trophy, what we do with it is the only uncertainty.

Not everyone who carries an instrument is a virtuoso, some are tone deaf and should never be allowed to even play, let alone lead the band.

In the struggle to live at peace we often do what seems easiest at the time, but...

It is much easier to learn how to play your own drum than it is to try to force a monkey to learn the measured rhythmn of the song that will soothe your soul.

It is foolish to expect him to even care what tune he plays when all he really wants to do is make noise and watch you flinch.

The only lasting happiness comes from being comfortable, first inside your own skin then inside your own space... and that cannot be accomplished if you are constantly playing name that tune with those closest to you. Snatch the drumsticks away from the primates and set your own tempo...it's the only way to dance.

I got the following as an email and liked it enough to place it here. Enjoy and pay it forward...THINK ABOUT IT...LET IT GROW...THEN DECIDE

The Cracked Pot

An elderly Chinese woman had two large pots, each hung on the ends of a pole which she carried across her neck. One of the pots had a crack in it while the other pot was perfect and always delivered a full portion of water. At the end of the long walk from the stream to the house, the cracked pot arrived half full. For a full two years this went on daily, with the woman bringing home only one and a half pots of water.
Of course, the perfect pot was proud of its accomplishments. But the poor cracked pot was ashamed of its own imperfection, and miserable that it could only do half of what it had been made to do. After 2 years of what it perceived to be bitter failure, it spoke to the woman one day by the stream.
"I am ashamed of myself, because this crack in my side causes water to leak out all the way back to your house."
The old woman smiled, "Did you notice that there are flowers on your side of the path, but not on the other pot's side? That's because I have always known about your flaw, so I planted flower seeds on your side of the path, and every day while we walk back, you water them."
"For two years I have been able to pick these beautiful flowers to decorate the table. Without you being just the way you are, there would not be this beauty to grace the house."
Each of us has our own unique flaw. But it's the cracks and flaws we each have that make our lives together so very interesting and rewarding. You've just got to take each person for what they are and look for the good in them. So, to all of my crackpot friends, have a great day and remember to smell the flowers on your side of the path!

Unwilling To Settle

2006-07-09T14:44:00.000-07:00

TODAY'S QUOTE:
"There is more in us than we know. If we can be made to see it perhaps for the rest of our lives we will be unwilling to settle for less."
Kurt Hahn

This quote is so true and I needed to remember its message. I am days and days behind in my writing, after a crash and burn moment or two dealing with some hard realities. In my confusion I forgot to do what always helps. For just a short time I overlooked who I am, and what makes me tick...tick...tick. I am made of much stronger stuff than anything that pushes against my space. My orbit will return to its rightful tilt if I just keep that reality at the top of the list I am struggling through.
I am not one to settle for crumbs for long. I give all, but if nothing comes back I limit the length of service given to any lost cause. As my soul-mate says, "I own this place." Renting it to fools seems a waste of pristine space, and each of us is pristine in our own fashion.
Settling is for dust. Humans are not made to settle without a price that is steeper than any of us can afford, if happiness is the our destination. I have had many moments in my lifetime where settling for whatever I was given was almost costly enough to kill my soul. How I lived through some is a mystery, how I thrived through others is a miracle, but the fact that I did should encourage everyone who reads here.
I am nothing special, no more human than the next person and if I can do it anyone else can too. All it really takes is determination to own what really belongs to you. I do not mean material things at all. I do not value manufactured products in a personal way, having none I would truly pine for except my computer. I only put it above the rest because of my writing, and the people I reach through its practice. What I truly value are the mostly hidden things inside each of us.
Life is so precious, even when it is less than perfect, and we are too. The real trick is internal balance and harmony. I found the place inside of me where the control switches are and nothing can truly defeat me as long as I stay within reach of them. Settling demands that you hand control over to someone else and that is never healthy in the long run. I learned that the hard way, from more than one source, but I finally have it centered at the top of my list of things to always remember... no matter what else I do forget.

THINK ABOUT IT

LET IT GROW

THEN DECIDE

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Count As Gain

2006-07-08T14:42:00.000-07:00

TODAY'S QUOTE:
"Refrain from asking what is going to happen tomorrow, and everyday that fortune grants you, count as gain."
Horace

There are times when thoughts of tomorrow torment a weary mind, wondering about someone else's agenda can cause us to fly in a holding pattern that is most disconcerting. After a short spell spent circling "What If Town", I travel on toward "There's No Sense In Fretting Village" and when I am very lucky I reach the edge of "I Only Give A Shit About The Here And Now Town" long before the day has ticked away too many wasted minutes.
What will happen... will happen, pre-worrying only lengthens any eventual wounding or shortens whatever possible happiness we already possess. Worry is mostly a useless emotion, changing nothing by its use except making obstacles grow in stature inside our panicked minds.
In all honesty, I would rather slowly open the gift of each new day without fretting about next week, or next month, or next year. I would rather savor every moment without wondering about time yet to come. I would rather digest one banquet before I sit down to another. I would much rather gain today than fret about yesterday or worry about tomorrow, so truly claiming today leaves me little time for anything else.

THINK ABOUT IT

LET IT GROW

THEN DECIDE

CLICK ON TITLE FOR ARTICLE AND VIDEO ABOUT A SORT OF BREAST CANCER THAT MOST WOMEN ARE UNAWARE OF, BUT SHOULD LEARN ABOUT...ASAP.

Divine Energy

2006-07-07T14:40:00.000-07:00

TODAY'S QUOTE:
"If you take a single step toward positive change, that divine energy will take a hundred steps toward you. New worlds and unbelievable possibilities will open up for you. The synchronicities that will begin appearing in your life will become a source of delight and amazement."
Joan Borysenko

Synchronicites are defined as the relation that exists when things occur at the same time. Synchronizations are the adjustments that causes something to occur or recur in unison. There is a symmetry to life when it is in perfect synch. True balance and real happiness can only come from embracing positives. Change is the key to every locked door, without it our existence is stunted to an area barely large enough to sustain life.
We cannot really live inside of such a barren territory. Going through the motions is about the best that can ever be achieved if we are not willing to mutate throughout our lifetime. Change should be viewed as an adventure, but all too often it is seen as an enemy. When one level is mastered it is only right and proper to go on to the next. If you reach a place that is too far above your ability then retracing steps is an option, while going as far as you deserve is a privilege. Just the attempt is a victory of sorts, trying is its own reward, succeeding is the icing on the cake.

Inside of each of us there are treasures just waiting for discovery. Dreams lay breathlessly waiting for life. Hopes are within easy reach, propping up whatever is sagging from too much pressure is a happy task. Depth is something that can only be reached by digging, and who better to man the shovel than the one who owns the property.
Life is not a spectator sport. The weak walk in safe ruts, never disturbing the surface of things. They are quite safe from most deep agony, but joy eludes their grasp as well. Life... real life... is awarded to those who push the envelope, risking all for just the chance to feel one moment of pure joy.
Unpolluted exhilaration only comes from positives. Negatives are soiled by nature, better left in the dirt than planted in any living tissue. They narrow our point of view to mean slits in the walls that surrounds them, draining the nourishment from any healthy roots within reach.
We all program our own minds to accept or reject whatever enters there. If your brain if filled with garbage, guess who is to blame? The power of will is astonishing, but it has to have someone at the helm to be of any use. During a fire it takes a fireman to direct the water to put out the flames, a hose without someone to point it is quite useless. In the same fashion, a mind left to its own devises will ramble and drift this way and that, directing the traffic inside your mind will avoid any major crashes. And clarity of thought will keep the traffic flowing smoothly upon any change worth making highway.

THINK ABOUT IT

LET IT GROW

THEN DECIDE

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Nobody Can

2006-07-06T14:37:00.000-07:00

TODAY'S QUOTE:
"Nobody can make you feel inferior without your permission." Eleanor Roosevelt

This is so true, but I find it extremely tiresome too have to demand what should be mine without the asking. Respect is important in any interchange, and belittling is disrespectful. Try to make me feel small, so you can seem taller, and I will chew your feet off as soon as the shock subsides.
I will not feel less whole just because someone else needs me to react in a certain way to feel complete. I will not fragment myself to glue someone else together. If you need a hand up... I will reach out without hesitation. If you need a step ladder... they sell them at the hardware store... so please keep your dirty shoes off my throat. I have placed control in other hands, but I learned some brutal lessons that help keep me much safer from footsteps of the brutal kind.
Any power given freely can be recalled in the same fashion at any time. Nobody else has control of what you take to heart. Fools speak more often and much louder than the wise. Volume in measure or acoustics does not signal that what is said is valid. Truly speaking, the opposite is true; screamed words or endless sentences are mostly fierce posturing by a weak individual. Nine times out of ten it is only hot air, blown for their agenda and has less to do with you than they ever wish you to realize. Puzzle that out and disarm them instantly. True power belongs in the hands of each individual to play whichever role we choose. If I am weak it is because I allow myself to be so, and when I tire of any jabbing by the clueless, I simply grab their pointer and break it over my will to survive.

THINK ABOUT IT

LET IT GROW

THEN DECIDE

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Wondering

2006-07-04T14:33:00.000-07:00

TODAY'S QUOTE:
"Inside every older person is a younger person -- wondering what the heck happened."
Cora Harvey Armstrong

Age is such a funny thing, seeming a concept much more often than it resembles reality. A number is just that, and words on official papers fade with the years. Some of us age at hyper speed and some drag their feet.
I say why rush to be aged, why hurry to be old, why run toward the rocking chair if you can choose a more productive or exciting destination. If we live long enough we will get old, if we live fully we will be well-aged, and if we are lucky our body will crumble long before our mind ceases to function.
There is an eternal teenager inside of each of us; some let it steer, some smother it into submission, some deny its existence, but the wise among us validate it by looking through those magical eyes from time-to-time. Yes, we risk the horror of suddenly remembering our age on paper, but we also have the chance of reclaiming how young we still remain.
I do not dwell on paper age, either with myself or my friends. It says very little about my reality, it is just a concept after all, and tells no major things of importance about my life. Yes, I am 52 on paper, but older in experience, younger at heart, ageless of soul, so which is the true measure??
I will not waste my time acting out someone else's idea of how my paper age should behave. I will not age my heart or shrivel my soul for the sake of conformity. I will be a crazy quilt of all the ages I possess and in that way stay less fractured than most. And when I hit that rocking chair I will have some precious memories to contemplate, but that is surely eon's from the here and now. Hell, I don't even own a rockin chair yet and I'm in no hurry to obtain one if it dooms me to a stationary position in the stunted space of my paper age.

THINK ABOUT IT

LET IT GROW

THEN DECIDE

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Sunny Faces

2006-07-03T12:39:00.000-07:00

TODAY'S QUOTE:
"Keep your face in the sunshine and you can never see the shadow."
Helen Keller

We are truly masters of our own fate in ways we do not always care to admit. It is much easier to pretend to have little choice in most things we battle, shouldering any responsibility forces us to cope with the very issues we are trying so hard to ignore. Huge things cannot be easily controlled. but dominate enough of the small stuff and larger ones shrink to a much more manageable size. Leave it all to twist in the wind and any stiff breeze will take you for a mighty ride.
The choice is always ours to make; we all have the same options for coping with or caving under whatever pressure our lives contains. The rainbow really does exist, but if you never raise your head it might just as well be an imaginary figment. If the view does not suit, adjust and refocus. If thoughts attack disarm them before the whole army appears to claim unprotected territory.
Looking on the bright side keeps footsteps firm and detours to a bare minimum. Treading through shadow can be risky, heading in that direction willingly seems foolhardy in the extreme. Travel toward the light, keeping all shadows to your back. Do not imagine them as nonexistent, nothing disappears just because you refuse to acknowledge its presence. Instead, see yourself as always one step ahead of the darkness trap, head up and searching for the rainbow.

THINK ABOUT IT

LET IT GROW

THEN DECIDE

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A Positive Search

2006-07-02T12:38:00.000-07:00

TODAY'S QUOTE:
"If you train your mind to search for the positive things about other people, you will be surprised at how many good things you can observe in them and comment upon."
Alan Loy Mcginnis

When special attention is given to positives they tend to multiply, commenting on them only adds more reason for others to act accordingly. Approval is a very heady motivation for most of us, it can strengthen a sagging resolve in no time flat. Pleasing someone you care about is so satisfying, especially if they are alert enough to notice and not take it for granted.
I always look for the best, and most times that is what I find. There is no use expecting the worst, whatever you serch for in life will be what is found.

Cherokee Wisdom
One evening an old Cherokee told his grandson about a battle that goes on inside people. He said, "My son the battle is between two 'wolves' inside us all. One is Evil. It is anger, envy, jealousy, sorrow, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, superiority and ego. The other is Good. It is joy, peace, love, hope, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion and faith."
The grandson thought about it for a minute and then asked his grandfather, "Which wolf wins?"
The old Cherokee simply replied, "The one you feed."

Star Dark

2006-07-01T12:36:00.000-07:00

TODAY'S QUOTE:
"When it is dark enough, you can see the stars."
Charles A. Beard

The darkest times have a habit of resetting priorities, suddenly ordinary things develop a new importance. Small pleasures are sweeter, larger ones become almost magical, people seem more precious, and each beckons with a brilliance that was unnoticeable before this space of deepest shadow.
In truth, they are no more vital to our happiness than they were before. They simply look bigger from our stunted position. We retreat deeper inside ourselves when storm clouds appear, withstanding the next tempest is much easier if the time spent there is used wisely. There is so much clarity in a place where we are forced to face ourselves without mask or costume.
The dawning of understanding is only one of the positives that glimmer and shine while we stumble through an eclipse. Using the things that suddenly shine with such brilliance, against the backdrop of adversity, to navigate by is the only way to travel safely. Do not underestimate the illumination that comes from starlight alone. Sailors have always used them as guides. Prudent travelers learn to pilot their vessels in the same fashion, minimizing the amount of time spent drifting at the whim of the weather.

THINK ABOUT IT

LET IT GROW

THEN DECIDE

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Self-Worth Measures

2006-06-30T08:08:00.000-07:00

TODAY'S QUOTE:
"Don't let negative people determine your self-worth."
Denis Waitley

Negatives function as drains, while positives operate like fountains. Negative people can quickly suck the life out of you, even in the best of times, but when they criticize their words cut soul-deep. Tender hearts get crushed under the weight of a heavy tongue, and if it is wagging in the mouth of someone you love it is hard not to believe the messages it delivers.
Love is not meant to deflate; to insulate, inflate, and elevate are loving actions, none of those can be accomplished by using negative means. How could a minus add anything of value to a friend or loved ones journey? Hard truths can be gently said, if it is your place to voice them, but most would be much better left unuttered. Examining your motives, with an open mind and a closed mouth, might save everyone a lot of agony.
If you are on the hearing end of derogatory remarks do not instantly swallow them as if they are factual. If you love the one talking it makes it harder to ignore. The person speaking may have an agenda that depends on your taking the baited hook they cast your way, but be a fish with a clue and swim on by.
I received the following as an email. It was a joke with some great advice mixed in, so I deleted the foolishness that made me laugh, and share here the profound that made me think. I added a new flash movie to this post, under title, just click it to watch. Enjoy, pay it forward, and as always.... think about it.... let it grow... then decide!!!

In ancient Greece (469 - 399 BC) Socrates was widely lauded for his wisdom. One day the great philosopher came upon an acquaintance who ran up to him excitedly and said, "Socrates, do you know what I just heard about one of your students?"
"Wait a moment," Socrates replied. "Before you tell me I'd like you to pass a little test. It's called the Triple Filter Test."
"Triple filter?"
"That's right," Socrates continued. "Before you talk to me about my student let's take a moment to filter what you're going to say. The first filter is truth. Have you made absolutely sure that what you are about to tell me is true?"
"No," the man said, "actually I just heard about it and..."
"All right," said Socrates. "So you don't really know if it's true or not. Now let's try the second filter, the filter of Goodness. Is what you are about to tell me about my student something good?"
"No, on the contrary..."
"So," Socrates continued, "you want to tell me something bad about him, even though you're not certain it's true?" The man shrugged, a little embarrassed. Socrates continued. "You may still pass the test though, because there is a third filter - the filter of Usefulness. Is what you want to tell me about my student going to be useful to me?"
"No, not really"
"Well," concluded Socrates, "if what you want to tell me is neither True nor Good nor even Useful, why tell it to me at all?"
Keep this philosophy in mind the next time you either hear, or are about to repeat a rumor.

A Friendly Leveled Nose

2006-06-29T08:06:00.000-07:00

TODAY'S QUOTE:
"Always hold your head up, but be careful to keep your nose at a friendly level."
Max L. Forman

There is such a fine line between walking with confidence and prideful striding, crossing it can be a very humbling experience. Life has a special way of punishing vanity. Conceit isolates, while self-assurance elevates. Anything totally ego based is selfish, both by nature and by design.
Imagining ourselves as truly superior, quickly erodes our perspective. Perfection is simply not a possibility, yet an egocentric person will claim it as their surname. Viewing so few as being worthy of peer status leaves little chance of developing any real friendships, anyone good enough to be considered a contemporary is certainly smart enough to recognize a peacock. Life should have some sort of balance and symmetry, but extremes of any sort instantly disable our equilibrium. An ego maniac is rarely rational enough to achieve any sense of balance.
Thinking too little of yourself does the same thing in reverse. Nothing derails confidence and takes the wind out of our sails more quickly or completely than a negative self-image. The real truth is that most of us are either less important than we imagine or more precious than we realize, depending upon our nature and the input received from whoever shares our space.
Sometimes we get positive encouragement, sometimes we are overburdened with negatives. We think much less of ourselves when we suffered constant censure, but there comes a point when we have to stop believing the bull-shit and start believing in ourselves. We should not feel better than anyone else, but if effort is put into improving our balance, we can certainly feel better about ourselves. Making peace with who we really are keeps our heads erect and our noses at a much friendlier level.

THINK ABOUT IT

LET IT GROW

THEN DECIDE

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I Claim The Right

2006-06-28T08:04:00.000-07:00

TODAY'S QUOTE:
"I claim the right to contradict myself. I don't want to deprive myself of the right to talk nonsense, and I ask humbly to be allowed to be wrong sometimes."
Federico Fellni

I claim all those rights as a human, yet examined a bit closer a contradiction is not always what it seems. Nonsense has a valid place and time, and being wrong is not a crime any of us is ever free of committing at periodic intervals. They are every humans birthright, but we should try to limit their use to a controllable level. A proper balance is the position to strive for, reaching it takes forethought and dedication to understanding yourself then making yourself understood.
A contradiction is defined as an opposition between two conflicting forces or ideas. Sometimes, when we contradict ourselves it is because we have not fully examined what we really think, so we wobble this way and that in the most irritating fashion. Sometimes we say something and only then think about all the implications involved and flip the script to rearrange our point of view. Changing our minds in mid-stream, can be our way of setting things right, not simply a fickle nature in action.
Talking nonsense is therapeutic in the most delightful way, if it is purposely done at the right moment, and not just a mindless around the clock babbling. Our minds should be hooked to our mouths, and the former ought to be engaged before the latter is given free rein. Saying the first thing that pops into our brain is asking for trouble. A few seconds of pondering can often save us a fat lip or puzzled frowns from anyone standing near enough to hear whatever is said that would have been much better off left unuttered.
Mistakes are certain, looking at them as opportunities to learn helps make them far less torturous. Many can be avoided by keeping our traps shut and our options open for as long as possible. We should not rush to decide things, or too quickly take a stand. Eating crow is not a pleasurable meal, it tastes like shit, is hard to swallow, and leaves the most bitter taste in your mouth.

THINK ABOUT IT

LET IT GROW

THEN DECIDE

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At What Cost

2006-06-27T08:02:00.000-07:00

TODAY'S QUOTE:
"It's not what you pay a man, but what he costs you that counts."
Will Rogers, 1879-1935, American Humorist and Entertainer

The personal cost of every encounter, with our fellow man, is worth so much more than any amount of cash involved. Some people bankrupt on all levels; some cost only in coin, but deposit freely in ways much too precious to calculate. The possible combinations are limitless in number and as unique from one another as snowflakes.
There is no way to assess beforehand just what kind of outcome will occur at any given time. The mystery is part of the driving force that moves us toward one another. Our own personal needs figure into it too; if brain surgery is needed calling a plumber is asking for a bad outcome. Seeking the proper assistance is half the battle won, and most of the war guaranteed.
Nowadays with the anonymity of the internet we are often out on a limb before we even hear the saw cutting into our perch. I was badly burned, but it did not stop me from believing in my fellow-man. It did not shake my confidence in myself either; all it did was prove that in this one case I paid a staggering price for NOTHING. Hell, that happens to all of us from time-to-time.
Learning from it then traveling on is the only way to get rid of the bitter taste. Faith has proved me right, often enough to allow me the honor of controlling the final cost of each encounter. I refuse to add to the bill by giving into negatives. Disappointment is only important in the lessons it teaches, so in a twisted way it pays its own price for its brief journey inside my orbit.
I thank God every day for that bitter disillusionment and the price I paid. If I had held onto that dead horse, I would have been in the wrong place to discover what I possess now. God bless the broken road that led me here. Travel swiftly through the bitter times, they hold nothing worth keeping once the lesson is fully learned. A better tomorrow is fairly earned by living through all the less than perfect yesterdays.

THINK ABOUT IT

LET IT GROW

THEN DECIDE

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SISTERHOOD SUPPORT

Word Calisthenics

2006-06-26T08:00:00.000-07:00

TODAY'S QUOTE:
"Wit has truth in it; wisecracking is simply calisthenics with words." Dorothy Parker, 1893-1967, American Writer

Words are wonderful tools. Every emotion under the sun can be invoked instantly by words spoken, heard, or read. One of the best uses is humor, and the spark ignites in an ever widening circle as others just naturally join in with the nonsense that one truly witty phrase can inspire.
Irony is one of my favorite styles of humor, using it as a measure most things can be seen as worthy of a chuckle or two at their expense. Ironic topics teach us to not take everything so seriously; often dry humor removes the stinger from a pesty situation, making it much less threatening to contemplate.
A well-put witty notion can be like a snowball rolling downhill, picking up speed as it travels. I have seen dozens of people transformed into quivering jesters, with tears running down their faces, by some of the strangest inane statements. A whole mass of people with the same foolish notion become as one, each trying to outdo one another, and nobody within earshot is immune to its healing magic.
When life seems too burdensome, there is nothing quite as welcome as a belly laugh to get some perspective. Giving into doom and gloom only weighs down an already too heavy load, but laughter gives us more energy for carrying whatever we must. Mirth is as beneficial to the spirit as a daily workout is to the body. Exercise your wit and it will transform a sagging spirit to buff and beautiful in seconds flat.

THINK ABOUT IT

LET IT GROW

THEN DECIDE

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SISTERHOOD SUPPORT

Whatever You Can

2006-06-25T07:58:00.000-07:00

TODAY'S QUOTE:
"Whatever you can do or dream you can, begin it: Boldness has genius, power, and magic in it."
Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

The art of dreaming is a humans saving grace, without some sort of image of something dream-worthy it is all too easy to become hopelessly overcome by life. Without day dreams of a better tomorrow, today would often be too brutal to contemplate. But a vision is only that, and nothing more, unless solid steps are taken to create it as reality.
As children we use our imaginations constantly, fine tuning them to a flawless point. I can recall countless times when kids from my neighborhood and I created a world all of our own, without the aid of the fancy gadgets they have today. We role played through years of summer days and most of the magic came from the creative thinking of young minds. Somewhere between childhood and adulthood too many of us misplace that ability or smother it, until all that is left is the distant memory of a time when anything seemed possible.
We forget how much power a dream can possess. We forget to believe that they can come true, and without faith we simply cannot manufacture enough energy to breathe any life into them. We forget often enough to make dreaming at all pointless. The remembering comes hard, but the magic is still there waiting for us to recapture its wondrous spell.
Dream large and small, short and tall then do what it takes to see one of them as your reality. Reach as high as you can then pull yourself up above where you stand now. Soar upon the winds of a real awakening and before long what was lost will find you. Have faith in yourself and create a life worth dreaming about.

THINK ABOUT IT

LET IT GROW

THEN DECIDE

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SISTERHOOD SUPPORT

The Greatest Good

2006-06-24T07:57:00.000-07:00

TODAY'S QUOTE:
"The greatest good you can do for another is not just to share your riches but to reveal to him his own."
Benjamin Disraeli

I know people of great value who for one reason or another doubt their own worth. I speak gently of the jewels I see sparkling here and there amid the fresh wounds and old scars that mark their travels. I offer a point of view that comes from long sight. My eyes do not simply scan the surface and dismiss someone in crisis as deserving of their burden. I look beyond the debris and clutter of the storm, overlooking the image of victim that they portray and see so clearly what can be if they choose to remove the costume they wear. Hell, there comes a point where it is up to you to change your footwear, no matter who put your feet inside of those cement shoes in the first place. What matters is how to move forward and the blame game is useless fuel, all it creates is more dead bitter space.
I used to walk in the same posture of defeat, head down, feet dragging; I know what an effort it takes sometimes to just breathe in and out. When life kicks you in the teeth often enough you start to expect it and somewhere along the line you lose any true sense of self. I been there and will never go back down that dead-end road. When I am very lucky someone shuffling along raises their head and sees their true reflection in my eyes. When they can match what they see with what I do it is a victory for both of us, but it takes faith in the worth of the journey and effort of the deepest kind to guarantee their transformation.
I try to let people come to the point of effort on their own terms, pushing what I see down a clutched throat is too hard and yields much less benefit than encouraging them to swallow at the speed that is most comfortable. I attempt to stay mostly silent, except for what I write here, unless asked point-blank, but I stand firm beside those who wish to have me nearby. I am not a miracle worker, but I have watched many being performed. Lives changed in my arena have changed me and how I view all who travel within my range of vision.
Hope is my tool of choice, I use it often and produce it without trying. I place it here freely for use by all who come for their daily fix. Nobody close to me is without merit; each earned their special place in a different fashion, but all are valuable beyond what they realize. I am acquainted with swans in tranformation mode, and mice who have learned to roar like lions, and stompers who struggle to glide more smoothly without losing any of their attitude, and true seekers of understanding who study constantly to find true enlightenment. I know and love many walking wounded in various stages of healing. My life is peopled with warriors of many kinds, from yummy mummy's to brightly tighted knight's and I see their beauty even when they do not.

THINK ABOUT IT

LET IT GROW

THEN DECIDE

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SISTERHOOD SUPPORT

Reap No After-Sorrow

2006-06-22T07:53:00.000-07:00

TODAY'S QUOTE:
"Conquer your foe by force, you increase his enmity; conquer by love, and you will reap no after-sorrow."
Fo-Sho-Hing-Tsan-King

This quote has such depth. I have seen it in action in my own life, so I know the truth it foretells. Force implies wrestling of body or mind; one opponent overpowering the other... one left prone in the dirt... the other towering above. To allow goodwill to direct the actions of your spirit and the moving of your lips often alters the ones you are dealing with from foe to friend, leaving no bitter residue behind for either to swallow.
Synonyms for the word conquer are: dominate, overpower, subdue, subject, subjugate, vanquish. These are all powerful words with negative definitions, unless they are used in the context of conquering a negative inside of yourself. To place any other person in the subjective role by force enslaves them and slaves have such a nasty habit of rebelling.
Enmity is defined as hatred which may be open or concealed. Either way it will rise again to bite the one it is directed toward, while damaging the one who harbors it inside the deepest recesses of their being. A bit of restraint and patience can eliminate the need for any after-sorrow on either side. Even if it does not help your foe, it will always benefit you.

I have found that former enemy's, treated with gentle hands, can become very loyal friends. One of my most trusted once held the title of enemy, and if I had treated him as he treated me it would have ended so differently. Both of us are happy now that one of us showed some restraint at the time of our many battles. I saw a hidden good and it unfolded to blossom into what is now a treasured friendship.
To respect the boundaries of anyone you are in conflict with instantly leaves space for compromise. I talk gently to people even when they do not do the same to me. I do not take instant offense at things said out of anger and frustration. I attempt to stay balanced even when others are not. I have found that to do so helps my state of mind and also leads to a spot where real communication can and mostly always does occur.
When we use hate or resentment as fuel we only build a fire that is out of control in seconds flat. The person you direct it toward may counter with a similar blaze. Two negatives, pointed from opposing sides causes an explosion in each persons soul. When the smoke clears, on the battlefield, whatever hate each felt at the beginning is magnified to measures beyond description. The war never ends there, no matter who won the battle.

THINK ABOUT IT

LET IT GROW

THEN DECIDE

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SISTERHOOD SUPPORT

The Six Most Important Things

2006-06-21T07:34:00.000-07:00

TODAY'S QUOTE:
"Every evening, write down the six most important things that you must do the next day. Then while you sleep your subconscious will work on the best ways for you to accomplish them. Your next day will go much more smoothly."
Tom Hopkins

I used to follow this advice, but I do not write things down anymore. Nowadays my list is penned with thoughts upon the surface of my mind. I am a good list maker, but I am an even better list misplacer. I need a list to function at a healthy level. I believe when we list things, we are drawing up a contract with ourselves, and most of us do our best to accomplish what is put to paper.
I think maybe six is a bit lofty for anyone who is easily overwhelmed. The unmotivated will see it as torture if there is nothing except chores listed there. So if you suffer from either condition take heart, simply reduce the number to fit your nature and include a delight among the tasks.
I see the whole list in a blurry way, focusing all my attention on whatever task I am working on, until I can mark it finished. I get straight out of bed and begin doing... often I am done with an item or two before I am even wide awake. During the day, if my feet begin to drag, I imagine a delight that is next in line and use it as a way to accelerate. There are tricks to getting bothersome things done, I use all of the ones I know and am constantly looking for others. The best way for me to face a day is with an agenda, I simply could not be trusted to get anything done otherwise. I map the journey then lean with the curves.

THINK ABOUT IT

LET IT GROW

THEN DECIDE

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Better Planning

2006-06-20T06:53:00.000-07:00

TODAY'S QUOTE:
"I find it fascinating that most people plan their vacations with better care than they plan their lives. Perhaps that is because escape is easier than change."
Jim Rohn

This is a scary thought, because it is so incredibly true. A person must continue to grow and change or we simply exist in a kind of zombie state of mind. We all seek escape from things, but the most certain and lasting freedom comes from facing the things that are inspiring our need to get away.
Ignoring something does not make it invisible. The truth is that the longer you avoid facing something the larger it grows. It feeds on the fear it produces, and flashes into mind just enough to keep you irritated. I have come to accept the fact that if a worry is thought of even one time, I better solve it or get used to hearing it again and again. Sometimes the only solution is acceptance of a bitter fact, but until it is faced there is no way to get any peace of mind.
I have been knocked down more times than I can calculate, but so far I have gotten up one more time than I have hit the dirt. Hell, to just lay there means the other guy wins. I demand the right to fight on. The experience of being hyper aware of what goes on inside of me during any crisis has given me a clear understanding of my strengths. I know with certainty that nothing on earth will ever make me hopeless enough to just turn belly up in surrender.
Change is brutal sometimes, but if the alterations are positive the final fit is flawless. It does not happen overnight, which takes the pressure of time out of the endeavor. What rate of speed matters hardly at all, if it is forward. The road to change has the most marvelous people on it, so finding someone to walk beside is a simple matter. When your soul sings in perfect harmony with a fellow traveler then the journey gets much easier. Those who walk as one should treat it as a blessing and take comfort from its unconditional qualities. Sometimes that is all we have to hold onto, but its strength is always equal to the task.
I want to use this space to thank all the people that people my life and make my journey easier in troubled times and joyous at every interaction. I got something special in my email and put it here, under the title. I want to echo its message. It made me ponder my own personal battlefield in a whole new light. Thank you, all the many warriors I know. One's like me who fight on even when weary beyond exhaustion. It is an honor to share the field with such as your mighty number. It's a hell of a battle isn't it??

THINK ABOUT IT

LET IT GROW

THEN DECIDE

CLICK ON THE TITLE TO VIEW

SOMETHING INCREDIBLY MOVING

Commitment to Excellence

2006-06-19T06:50:00.000-07:00

TODAY'S QUOTE:
"Desire is the key to motivation, but it's determination and commitment to an unrelenting pursuit of your goal - a commitment to excellence - that will enable you to attain the success you seek"
Mario Andretti

Motivation is a problem for any human who has been brought to their knees often enough to cause a natural aversion to putting themselves in harms way. Trying becomes an enemy, failure an expectation, and desires get smothered as soon as they surface. Why want something you cannot have? Why try for something outside of your reach? Without desire there is no motivating force to inspire forward motion.
They become like the students in the back of class who sink deep into their seats, hoping to be totally ignored until the bell rings and they can escape. Life becomes a burden if it is not really lived, but without desire or motivation it remains at the breathe in breathe out and hope the air runs out soon stage.
I know about pain and the overcoming of it, I once was that person scrunched down in the back row. It took me forty years to begin to unfold and move nearer to the front of the room. Since then I have tossed many lifelines to fellow travelers, but unless someone is willing to grab hold whatever I do does no good. The agony of seeing someone drift away is intense, my own sense of failure at such moments is overwhelming, but hope cannot be force fed.
I found my way back from the edge. I KNOW hope and self-awareness can unlock the prison doors. I KNOW that to believe in yourself is to validate your RIGHT to the pursuit of happiness. I KNOW that the road back is brutal, but at least it is not a dead end. The possibilities are there, like a field of wildflowers, but you cannot make a bouquet without picking them one-by-one. What you tell yourself will dictate what you end up with; say you amount to nothing and you will end up empty handed by default, say you matter and the volume of blooms you can hold will be limitless.
I had to remind myself often that I mattered, knowing that act will become fact if it is practiced with a determination to create it as your reality. I had to silence many voices inside my head, but the hardest to control was my own. I had bought into bull-shit for so long that I was close to certain that the bull-shitters were correct in their assessment of my worth. But inside my weary brain there rested one small shining grain of hope; I grabbed ahold and built a life around it, knowing that to surrender would be sure suicide even if I continued to breathe.
I will not just meekly take whatever life hands me, folding under the pressure that is part of this journey. I will thrive no matter what happens to me or around me, because safely sheltered deep inside my soul is that grain of hope I discovered long ago. I exercise it every day, inside my own mind and heart, but also within the limitless boundaries of Journey's End.

THINK ABOUT IT

LET IT GROW

THEN DECIDE

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To Be Alive

2006-06-18T06:48:00.000-07:00

TODAY'S QUOTE:
When we were children, we used to think that when we were grown-up we would no longer be vulnerable. But to grow up is to accept vulnerability... To be alive is to be vulnerable.
Madeleine L'Engle

The down side of this is instantly evident, pain is certain at whatever stage we are at in life, but then again so is joy. Sometimes it is blessing, sometimes it is curse; I figure, really living is a crazy combination of those two extremes.
Reality can travel from the highest mountaintop to the deepest valley in the time it takes to blink. The other direction is more than possible too, making being as alive as possible well worth the risk. Experiencing even one moment of perfect happiness is worthy of the pain of the journey to get there.
Odds are good that the price will seem high at the time of payment, but once joy hits like a lightning bolt the cost matters not in the least. Any bliss should be slowed to a crawl and absorbed fully, no matter its duration. The mind will take magical snapshots, when joy reaches a certain level, complete in every breathtaking detail, and their images stays vivid over time.
It does not matter at which point in life that understanding occurs. The full life often feels like many lifetimes in one. The ending of one to reach the next is not always voluntary, but it is certain that to really live today, letting go of yesterday is mandatory. Take the past joys, abandon the pain and begin anew. Why look behind so hard that all the possibilities in front are ignored? True joy could be standing just a forward step away.
The point may come when all that is left is the scrapbook created during a lifetime. What is inside its weathered cover is the sum total of the journey. When the book is opened it seems best to have pages worth turning slowly. Here's to living every moment as if were the last and taking tons of pictures.

THINK ABOUT IT

LET IT GROW

THEN DECIDE

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SISTERHOOD SUPPORT

Silent Destiny

2006-06-16T10:45:00.000-07:00

TODAY'S QUOTE:
No trumpets sound when the important decisions of our life are made. Destiny is made known silently.
Agnes DeMille

The silent times of true soul searching are sacred. Where else would you go to ponder something as magical as destiny, than the depth of your soul? The gentle surroundings there can take the worst sting out of most painful situations, or multiply joy to limits that are almost orgasmic in intensity. Contemplation of anything of true import has clarity that cannot be reached anywhere else, because the only voice you hear there is your own.
Finding the route to your destiny is simple when you look for it soul-deep; a path with heart is a phrase a wise man used that instantly caught my attention as being a flawless way of describing a worthy avenue. We all alter the lives of everyone we touch, whether for good or evil is the only uncertainty. If we imagine we give nothing worth receiving then chances are good that we have a deep well to draw from that we have never really tapped. Humans who only take never even bother with such thoughts, so if you are thinking along those lines you are half way home already.
I know some who think their passage is pointless, but they could not be more mistaken, although convincing them of that fact is like trying to move a mountain using chopsticks. I see so clearly not only their reality, but also their possibilities. It may seem to some that I am simply naive, but this too is a falsehood. I see with the eyes of a craftsman, viewing a weather beaten house. I see what is, what was, and what can be; each is different, the first cannot be changed, the second is pointless to contemplate for long, but the last is most important, yet it is given the least attention. What can be is what I see first, eclipsing all other considerations, and if that makes me naive in some minds then I just figure they are too short-sighted to really have a clue anyway.
A house can be rebuilt from the ground up and so can people. The only reason either does not get done is because of the effort involved in the tasks. Hell, it is hard to change, even brutal at times. The parallel between remodeling and remolding is similar enough to be mind-boggling when you think about it.
In both cases you have to:
1- tear out and replace what has been weakened by time and the elements.
2- pay the price asked for whatever will make it a place worth inhabiting.
3-spend long hours cleaning up the mess that a work in progress inspires.
The list continues, but my mind has already gone on to some wonderful differences I would like to point out. In the case of a human restoration there are things that do not apply, and thank God for that I say.
1- You do not have to apply for a building permit.
2- You do not need a blueprint.
3- You do not need any tools that you do not already possess.
4- What was does not lock you into any set pattern.
5- What the neighbors think matters not a bit, since they will continue to see you as who you were long after you are who you were meant to be.
This list goes on too, but to place all I can come up with here will not encourage you to take the concept further on your own terms and see the big picture as it applies from your unique point of view. Some will read this and instantly see it as truth, others will doubt on in total oblivion. Some will let it breathe life on a spark of hope and build a roaring fire to better see its reality. Some will read the words then pffftttt and try to forget their challenge. Some will start ripping out walls and others will simply pick up their chopsticks and continue mountain-moving one pebble at a time.

THINK ABOUT IT

LET IT GROW

THEN DECIDE

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Implications

2006-06-15T10:06:00.000-07:00

TODAY'S QUOTE:
"I believe that every right implies a responsibility; every opportunity, an obligation; every possession, a duty."
John D. Rockefeller

The things we think we own all too often own us. I have spent the last year changing my attitude about my possessions. Nowadays there are very few things I would carry forward into any new location. Most of them are reflections of a past I no longer reside inside of, letting them belong to others will be more of a relief than a heartache. The sign posts they represent are outdated and cobweb covered, even their memory is faded to a degree where I would have to struggle to view them with any clarity.
Like clothes that no longer fit or whose fashion has outlived its heyday, they mostly hang untouched and forgotten. Fashion often has a rebirth, but whatever hangs in the cupboard I left behind has no hope whatsoever of ever being worn by me again. The moving on in life demands that we discard whatever slows us down, so I will not pack my trunk with useless weight or I will never get where I hope to go.
I will keep the things that reflect what I have accomplished so far. I will keep the items that will further my journey. I will cherish the happy memories, however few, of a long ago time without dragging along the ones that would only keep on wounding a heart that is all to tired of pain. I will go on from here, carrying a lighter load and try to minimize the number of THINGS I place undo importance in owning. When it is all said and done, the treasures inside matter the most and it is no burden to take them wherever you travel.

THINK ABOUT IT

LET IT GROW

THEN DECIDE

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Deep Listening

2006-06-14T10:00:00.000-07:00

TODAY'S QUOTE:
Deep listening is miraculous for both listener and speaker. When someone receives us with open-hearted, non-judging, intensely interested listening, our spirits expand.
Sue Patton Thoele

The art of listening involves more than just the ears; eyes, mind, heart, and soul are mandatory to truly absorbing all that is said and at least some of what is not. I hear better when I listen with my eyes too, and anyone who looks at me when I am talking to them always receives the most of what is centered inside of me.

There is nothing that will make me go instantly silent faster than to see a listeners eyes grow dim, signaling inattention as surely as if they put out a neon sign. On the other side of the scale there is nothing that will inspire my urge to say something worth hearing faster than the light of true interest in their gaze. Deep-listening blesses both the speaker and the listener.
The one hearing does not have to say a word to do pure magic. Comfort is instant and soul-deep. Listening well, but gently means you suspend judgment. People need at least one person that they can speak to without editing every word. Unconditional ears are such a treasure to have at our disposal. When you are very lucky, the same person returns the favor and trusts you enough to say the things that are hidden deep inside of them without worry of any censure.
Every lasting relationship, of any sort, has deep-listening at its core. Trust and love are great building blocks, but without the sound structure of true communication the richess and depth of the whole structure suffers. I thank God for the deep listeners I know, loving them enriches me in ways that are priceless beyond description. You all know who you are and why I love you; life has taught me to voice my appreciation of each of you often and well. If I mean half as much to you as you mean to me, I am very lucky indeed.

THINK ABOUT IT

LET IT GROW

THEN DECIDE

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Knowing

2006-06-13T09:54:00.000-07:00

TODAY'S QUOTE:
Next to knowing when to seize an opportunity, the most important thing in life is to know when to forego an advantage.
Benjamin Disraeli (1804-1881), The Infernal Marriage (1834)

Knowing how to act in any given situation takes real knowledge that we often do not bother obtaining. We gaze at the surface and believe that is all there is, when just a peek behind the facade will reveal so much more than the obvious. We rush too much, like this is a race, and miss so much in the mad dash to the finish line.
Making every day a little life helps adjust your vision, so the little things of great import do not get so easily overlooked. Sight is relative; the direction you point your attention is where you see the most of whatever scenery surrounds the thing centered inside your gaze. The length of time you glance and the intensity of the attention you pay earns you knowledge or robs you of it, according to your determination to really see and understand the landscape.
I received a notice of a new flash movie and enjoyed it very much. In a lot of ways it shows you how to adjust your vision to a more reliable setting. I placed the link under the title, so just click it and enjoy. Pass it on, pay it forward, and help someone regain their sight.

THINK ABOUT IT

LET IT GROW

THEN DECIDE

CLICK ON THE TITLE FOR THE FLASH MOVIE

I AM ALIVE

Our Angry Enemy

2006-06-12T09:51:00.000-07:00

TODAY'S QUOTE:
Anger is the real destroyer of our good human qualities; an enemy with a weapon cannot destroy these qualities, but anger can. Anger is our real enemy.
His Holiness the Dalai Lama

Anger is defined as belligerence aroused by a real or supposed wrong (personified as one of the deadly sins). Living with it is akin to having a cancer of the soul. The negative emotions it inspires eats away at all the healthy tissue it touches, doing much more harm to the person feeling it than anyone it is aimed toward.
The fact is that most people you actively hate get more pleasure out of the agony it brings to you than they do anything else. It always comes to my mind that hating them pleases them somehow, which makes me drop it like I would a red hot coal. The last emotion I want to inspire in anyone I am irritated with is pleasure. Let them get their cheap thrills at someone else's expense, whatever they did to cause my displeasure in the first place is plenty of pain to feel from one source.
Being angry at a situation does no good either, it just makes the hardship grow inside you until it is so huge it is overwhelming. If anger solved anything I would allow it, but growing an obstacle to greater height just makes it impossible to overcome. Oh, do not misunderstand me, I believe there are many things worthy of anger. I just know that dwelling on them in that fashion only makes it harder to find a solution or accept as reality if no solution is possible.
I feel it when it is valid then let it go and move on. I change it if possible, accept it if not, but to allow it to rule my actions or ruin my life is a total waste of time and effort. It scatters our thoughts as surely as if we had set a bomb off inside of our brain. It keeps all wounds seeping. It breaks our hearts and shrivels our souls. It is like quicksand, sucking us under with such speed that there is no escape.
I wish the world were a gentler planet, so I do what I can to make that happen. I know that to make my portion of it less brutal, I must let go of the negatives. If I lay down my anger and turn it over to a higher hand to sort out then my surrounding are gentler. I may not see the result of his judgment, although I never doubt there will be one, but I do see the benefit inside my personal space. I do not have to wait to view the good that comes; it is instant, it is soul deep, and it is completely empowering.

THINK ABOUT IT

LET IT GROW

THEN DECIDE

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SISTERHOOD SUPPORT

Turning Tides

2006-06-11T09:41:00.000-07:00

TODAY'S QUOTE:
When you get into a tight place and everything goes against you until it seems that you cannot hold on for a minute longer, never give up then, for that is just the place and time that the tide will turn.
Harriet Beecher Stowe

The giving up spot should always be in a place of power, where thoughts are sensible and the reasons for jumping ship outnumber the ones for standing pat. A place of panic or pity is not the location to make choices that may affect the quality and direction of your life. Decisions made during crisis are often the wrong ones, because of all the negative emotions and thoughts that attack at such times.
There is a time for giving up on some things, but to end something in the midst of high drama just exacerbates the problems to a level that often leaves us no turning back spot once reason returns. I try not to over-react. If negatives attack I go for a walk or perform a mindless task and direct my concentration there as if my life depended upon the scenery I pass or the dust bunnies I chase.
I have an aversion to giving up, thinking that one more day... or hour... or minute just might finally earn me a victory. In life failures are so easy, all you have to do is nothing and they fall into your lap. Successes are hard, sometimes brutally so... but that is what makes them so sweet. Dreams lived are the most beautiful things life has to offer, but they do not come free of cost. Imagining something does not give it breath. A spark will not start a fire if there is nothing there to ignite.
Gathering the ingredients for a healthy blaze is not always an easy thing. Life can be a cold place and the landscape is often barren, but to willingly lay down and freeze is unconceivable to me. If there is nothing to build on where you are, walking in circles will not make magic. Move on to someplace that offers more in the way of likely fuel, and build a fire you can sit beside in comfort. Once it blazes bright, glance sideways and say hello. :)

THINK ABOUT IT

LET IT GROW

THEN DECIDE

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A Human Journey

2006-06-10T09:01:00.000-07:00

TODAY'S QUOTE:
We are not human beings on a spiritual journey. We are spiritual beings on a human journey.
Stephen R. Covey

This is true, although some of us never realize the importance of being spiritual. I do not equate being spiritual with any certain organized religion. The dictionary lists religion as being a definition of spiritual, but in my book it has more to do with the spirit itself. Whether or not it is housed inside a religious persons body is of little concern to me. We each possess one even if we never enter a church.
We are soul based and its health or sickness reflects upon all our many parts. Keeping it healthy is something that we often ignore. We stumble along sick at heart, and weary of mind without knowing that by paying attention to what is going on deep inside will give us relief. We look for a pill to fix it or seek someone special to fill the emptiness inside of us, when we would be better off tending to it the good old fashioned way.
Simply listen to what it tells you and it will lead you to what it needs to be cured of the things that ail it. Validate it by paying attention to the wisdom it possesses. Embrace its eternal quality and value its strength. Give it what it seeks and peace will belong to you in ways you never imagined. Defend it and it will be a haven, no matter what else is clamoring for attention in your life.

THINK ABOUT IT

LET IT GROW

THEN DECIDE

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A New Door

2006-06-09T08:57:00.000-07:00

TODAY'S QUOTE:
All beginnings require that you unlock a new door.
Rabbi Nachman of Bratslav

This quote is so true, but adding to that theme... often you have to lock an old door to move forward, as well as turning a key in a new one. Hell, sometimes you have to nail it closed, wall it behind solidly placed bricks, dig a moat, and fill it with man eating varmits to keep yourself safe from whatever lurks on the other side. There are times when you lock it and can hear someone struggling with the knob and trying to insert a key of their own. Once your back is firmly turned, you are safe enough... but one glance backward can undo all your hard work if you are not determined enough to keep going forward.
I have seen some people use a revolving door that leads nowhere sane but they continue spinning in place for years, even though they are never satisfied where it leads them. I did that myself for much too long to waste more time now on the same fools errand. I may spin for a time, if the reward seems worth the effort... but after a few mighty turns I say screw this and jump to solid ground. Slam, insert, turn, twist, and run like hell is a much saner list of actions than spinning in place till you fall over.
A dead horse will not rise, no matter the force used to kick it. Sleeping dogs should be tiptoed by or shot in the head to save you a brutal bite. The past is not worth repeating, unless it was of some fun the first time around. And life goes on and on and endlessly on, so why walk the same tired path to nowhere worth being when so much territory is still unexplored?

THINK ABOUT IT

LET IT GROW

THEN DECIDE

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Amended Philosophy

2006-06-08T08:41:00.000-07:00

TODAY'S QUOTE:
"If you want to amend your errors, you must begin by amending your philosophy."
Jim Rohn

Philosophy is defined as any personal belief about how to live or how to deal with a situation. A person's own philosophy belongs to them alone and is shaped by their nature and life experiences. It is internal, yet ever altering by the things happening to or around them, like a kaleidoscope that shifts its color and design with each twist of their perception point.
Because it belongs to each individual and is internally situated we can and should examine it often. Just having beliefs, but never questioning them or their location leaves us half blinded by any situation that is out of our control, making us much too reactionary. If you fly too low, on auto-pilot, and a mountain suddenly appears there is nothing to do except crash land by default. We cannot control all of the things that suddenly materialize in our lives, but we have more control over our reactions than most of us realize.
Old attitudes do not just dry up and drop off, like spent flowers when new buds appear, but must be pruned by the person who owns the territory in which they are planted. Weeds will crop up on their own. Other people will try to plant in any space you leave undefended or untended. Without care nothing stays healthy for long. It just seems a foolish thing to not pay close attention to what is deep inside, since it alters everything we do and every step we take.

THINK ABOUT IT

LET IT GROW

THEN DECIDE

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A Created Life

2006-06-07T03:07:00.000-07:00

TODAY'S QUOTE:
I do believe it is possible to create, even without ever writing a word or painting a picture, by simply molding one's inner life. And that too is a deed.
Etty Hillesum

That is a deed, indeed. Acceptance of the status quo is a kind of zombie walk through life, where you just act upon whatever facts are presented to you. Everyone has an agenda and buying into everyone else's without even knowing what your own is, means you are forever doomed to failure. So many of us have no clue about what we really think or believe. I know because I was once like that in the extreme.
Nowadays, I know more about myself than I often want to, but good or bad at least I have a clue. I have strong opinions about things that affect my soul. Many brutal lessons have taught me to give special honor to the voice that screams when I get too close to the edge of losing self, but I refuse to sweat the small shit.
Ask me what I want for dinner and I will say I do not care. I want to fill the empty space so that it will not pester me with hunger pains, but what I place there is not something I really think about. Ask me where I want to go and I will most often not have a real opinion on that either. I am satisfied inside my three feet of personal space. If I am secure linking it to another persons, where I rest at any given time really matters not all that much.
I do not get bored when I am alone. I am always exercising my brain in one way or another. Take away my pen and paper and I will find a book that challenges my mind. No books in sight and I will sink deep into thought and find satisfaction there. I am excellent company for myself and an undemanding guest inside of the space others invite me into.
Long ago, I erased the graffiti other people had written inside of me. Back then I was not ever at ease. It is truly impossible to find peace when the people you love demand you be a certain pattern to please them and change its style every time you get close to achieving their goal. Shadow boxing is a pain in the ass when the shadow is you and your punches are directed by others. Creation comes from the inside out. The sky is the limit, when you paint your own masterpiece, using colors you create on a canvas that belongs to you alone.
There comes a time when you admit that the flaws are a part of the picture. There comes a point where you learn to like yourself enough to say to the people viewing what you have become... "Take it or leave it, but do not paint your own design over mine." Try creating your own picture. Life is not a paint by numbers experience. Coloring in someone else's book does not make it your creation.
I received the following as an email. Sharing its message here is my delight. Enjoy and pass it on. Pay it forward, folks.

The Daffodil Principle

Several times my daughter had telephoned to say, "Mother, you must
come to see the daffodils before they are over."
I wanted to go, but it was a two-hour drive from Laguna to Lake
Arrowhead.
"I will come next Tuesday," I promised a little reluctantly on her
third call.
Next Tuesday dawned cold and rainy.
Still, I had promised, and
reluctantly I drove there.
When I finally walked into Carolyn's house I was welcomed by the
joyful sounds of happy children. I delightedly hugged and greeted my
grandchildren.
"Forget the daffodils, Carolyn! The road is invisible in these
clouds and fog, and there is nothing in the world except you and these
children that I want to see badly enough to drive another inch!"
My daughter smiled calmly and said, "We drive in this all the
time, Mother."
"Well, you won't get me back on the road until it clears, and then
I'm heading for home!" I assured her.
"I was hoping you'd take me over to the garage to pick up my car."
"How far will we have to drive?"
"Oh...just a few blocks," Carolyn said. "But I'll drive. I'm used
to this."
After several minutes, I had to ask, "Where are we going? This
isn't the way to the garage!"
"We're going to my garage the long way," Carolyn smiled, "by way
of the daffodils."
"Carolyn," I said sternly, "please turn around."
"It's all right, Mother, I promise. You will never forgive
yourself if you miss this experience."
After about twenty minutes, we turned onto a small gravel road and
I saw a small church. On the far side of the Church, I saw a hand
lettered sign with an arrow that read, "Daffodil Garden."
We got out of the car, each took a child's hand, and I followed
Carolyn down the path. Then, as we turned a corner, I looked up and
gasped. Before me lay the most glorious sight. It looked as though
someone had taken a great vat of gold and poured it over the mountain
peak and it's surrounding slopes.
The flowers were planted in majestic, swirling patterns, great
ribbons and swaths of deep orange, creamy white, lemon yellow, salmon
pink, and saffron and butter yellow. Each different-colored variety was
planted in large groups so that it swirled and flowed like its own river
with its own unique hue. There were five acres of flowers.
"Who did this?" I asked Carolyn.
"Just one woman," Carolyn answered. "She lives on the property.
That's her home."
Carolyn pointed to a well-kept A-frame house, small and modestly
sitting in the midst of all that glory.
We walked up to the house. On the patio, we saw a poster. "Answers
to the Questions I Know You Are Asking" was the headline.
The first answer was a simple one. "50,000 bulbs," it read. The
second answer was, "One at a time, by one woman. Two hands, two feet,
and one brain." The third answer was, "Began in 1958."
For me, that moment was a life-changing experience. I thought of
this woman whom I had never met, who, more than forty years before, had
begun, one bulb at a time, to bring her vision of beauty and joy to an
obscure mountaintop. Planting one bulb at a time, year after year, this
unknown woman had forever changed the world in which she lived. One day
at a time, she had created something of extraordinary magnificence,
beauty, and inspiration.
The principle her daffodil garden taught is one of the greatest
principles of celebration. That is, learning to move toward our goals
and desires one step at a time--often just one baby-step at time--and
learning to love the doing, learning to use the accumulation of time.
When we multiply tiny pieces of time with small increments of
daily effort, we too will find we can accomplish magnificent things. We
can change the world.
"It makes me sad in a way," I admitted to Carolyn. "What might I
have accomplished if I had thought of a wonderful goal thirty-five or
forty years ago and had worked away at it 'one bulb at a time' through
all those years? Just think what I might have been able to achieve!"
My daughter summed up the message of the day in her usual direct
way.
"Start today," she said.
She was right. It's so pointless to think of the lost hours of
yesterdays. The way to make learning a lesson of celebration instead of
a cause for regret is to only ask, "How can I put this to use today?"
Use the Daffodil Principle. Stop waiting;
Until your car or home is paid off;
Until you get a new car or home;
Until your kids leave the house;
Until you go back to school;
Until you finish school;
Until you clean the house;
Until you organize the garage;
Until you clean off your desk;
Until you lose 10 lbs.;
Until you gain 10 lbs.;
Until you get married;
Until you get a divorce;
Until you have kids;
Until the kids go to school;
Until you retire;
Until summer;
Until spring;
Until winter;
Until fall;
Until you die...
There is no better time than right now to be happy.

THINK ABOUT IT

LET IT GROW

THEN DECIDE

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Wondering

2006-06-06T02:58:00.000-07:00

TODAY'S QUOTE:
"People travel to wonder at the height of the mountains, at the huge waves of the seas, at the long course of the rivers, at the vast compass of the ocean, at the circular motion of the stars, and yet they pass by themselves without wondering."
Saint Augustine

The first fifty years of my life were spent in a mostly stationary location, although I have traveled many miles in the two years since that time, and for that I am grateful. The trips I have taken are important, but without the one I took at forty none of them would ever have occurred. The most profound journey of my lifetime began on my fortieth birthday and continues today. It has led me to discoveries that some people never make about life and about themselves.
I had passed myself, lost myself, sold myself short for all those years before my awakening. Every day since I have tried to stay alert to what is going on inside of my secret garden and what prompts whatever is occurring, not for simple curiosities sake, but for the sake of survival of self. I do not travel perfectly there, mistakes are a common human condition and I am all to human. I journey with determination to get the most good out of every step, and that is the best I can do.
Travel by all means, if you have the chance, but visit the most important place on earth once and a while too. The secrets you reveal, the treasures you will find make for a much richer life, no matter what your circumstances. Lighten your baggage whenever possible. Slow your steps to absorb the scenery inside then alter what offends your eye. Walk with pride where it is safe to be whomever you really are then ease that person into the real world. Listen to the drummer deep inside, balance lightly on the balls of your feet then dance to the tune only you can hear.

THINK ABOUT IT

LET IT GROW

THEN DECIDE

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Regardless Sense

2006-06-05T02:54:00.000-07:00

TODAY'S QUOTE:
Hope is definitely not the same thing as optimism. It is not the conviction that something will turn out well, but the certainty that something makes sense, regardless of how it turns out.
Vaclav Havel (b. 1936)

It would be so much tidier if only things that made perfect sense came true. Less people would die, because all senseless deaths would be impossible. Relationships would be lifelong, because the right people would recognize each other, for all the right reasons. Pointless existencess could not occur, because everyone would have hope and that keeps us humans striving when the chips are down. The hope for a better tomorrow is a powerful tool to get you through a less than perfect today.
I could keep going on endlessly with examples, but that in itself would be pointless. I 'spect ya got the idea, and are turning it over in your own mind by this point. Life is not that way, and never will be. But...hope makes it worth the effort, and sometimes when we are very lucky or very determined our hopes do come true. Mine have often enough for me to gladly cling to them when I have nothing else to keep me afloat.
I am optimistic by nature and by design. To not think the best is possible is to guarantee it will never happen. We defeat ourselves inside our minds first then it just radiates outward. I have watched enough people create the very things they fear by actions that could be easily avoided, to know that some thrive only on misfortune and all its many negative layers. I will never follow their lead, no matter what happens to me good or bad.
Give me hope and I will struggle onward. One grain of hope can divert a raging river of trouble. One gust of hope can send you soaring over any obstacle no matter its height. One glimmer of hope can light the way through even the darkest tunnel. If you do not possess any then pretend that you do and soon you will. I pray that there is enough of it laying around inside the peaceful boundaries of Journey's End to give at least a small dose to all who visit here.

THINK ABOUT IT

LET IT GROW

THEN DECIDE

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Disappointment or Doom

2006-06-04T02:47:00.000-07:00

TODAY'S QUOTE:
"You may be disappointed if you fail, but you are doomed if you don't try."
Beverly Sills

There are no guarantees in life; any attempt at anything has a measure of risk to it, but no attempt at all is a sure way of spending your life running in place. I know disappointment well. Sometimes it seems very fond of spending time with me, visiting often dressed in different costumes, but always wearing the same tired old frown. I never invite it to linger, knowing well its longing to take over any territory that it inhabits for longer than a passing moment or two.
I am not frightened by the possibility of failure, it is as much a part of life as rainy days. I am not put off by the thought of landing on my face in the dust, because even if I do fall I will not linger long in that prone position. Getting back up and moving on is an exercise I seem to have a talent for, it must be the practice makes perfect rule of thumb that keeps my jumping up muscles strong. I may wish I did not have to use the talent so often, but I am thankful to possess it when I am making use of its healing properties.
I try because I must, so many wasted years gives me much less time to squander than most people possess. I attempt my hearts desires, because a satisfying life will not just land on my doorstep by chance. Really living takes action. Standing still for too long simply makes it all the harder to move forward, so I struggle on lest I grow roots where I am and miss out altogether where I could be with just a bit of effort.

THINK ABOUT IT

LET IT GROW

THEN DECIDE

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Stillness

2006-06-03T08:18:00.000-07:00

TODAY'S QUOTE:
In the midst of movement and chaos, keep stillness inside of you.
Deepak Chopra

Silence of the soul is a treasure beyond compare. Once found it is like a force field, surrounding you and keeping the worst of the pain away. Money cannot buy it, poverty cannot destroy it, and trouble cannot do more than slightly dent its surface. It comes from knowing yourself and accepting your faults. It comes from seeing your imperfections, smoothing the ones you can and coming to terms with the rest. It comes from valuing your own personal space and respecting everyone else's space as well.
Deeply held silence gives a quiet place to reflect upon things without the echo of any voice except your own. A higher hand can reach there without any effort, but a heavy hand does not have a chance of entering the secret garden of your soul once you set up the boundaries that keep it sound proof.
When a heartache or worry is given to me, deserved or not, I take it to that quiet place and deal fairly with it as soon as possible. I either accept or reject blame without shame knowing that I never set out to hurt others. I either devise a plan for solving a problem or decide there is no solution and accept it as reality. I deal with what is going on inside of me because of external things out of my control. All my best lessons are learnt inside that peaceful place, the most brutal truths faced, the good and the bad are given equal space and consideration.
I am FAR from perfect, but then I have never claimed perfection. I just know that I believed for too long the voices that told me I was not worth much. I accept whatever portion of the blame I deserve for my abuse and the abuse of my children. I have come to terms with that part of my life and have moved on. The beginning of my odyssey toward acceptance was finding the silent space and using it as wisely as possible. It served me well through both brutal days and brighter ones.
It is not a place that you should only visit when life has you by the short hairs. To simply use it as a spot to dump your sorrows would all too soon make it a place of dread. Joys should be invited too. Everything examined inside its boundaries has a clarity that cannot be achieved anywhere else on earth. All things of import should pass through its gates for processing, so that the most good can be gotten out of all that touches you. I make time to visit every day, if only for a short time, to regain my balance. It is not a place to hide inside of, it is a place where you can learn how to thrive.

THINK ABOUT IT

LET IT GROW

THEN DECIDE

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Well-Tamed Mind

2006-06-01T14:11:00.000-07:00

TODAY'S QUOTE:
Hard to hold down,
nimble,
alighting wherever it likes:
the mind.
Its taming is good.
The mind well-tamed brings ease.
Dhammapada

The taming of the mind is a never ending endeavor that gets easier with practice and time. Every obstacle we encounter inspires negative thoughts. When they go unchallenged we are held hostage and terrorized at their leisure. Learning how to silence then bounce them out of your brain is not all that hard, although it takes consistent determination against playing the victims role to idle notions inspired by blind panic.
Some thoughts soar like birds, and some slither like snakes. I hate snakes, so I assigned negative thoughts that image, making it much easier to remove them from any area under my control. If I would not open my front door and invite a serpent into my house, why would I welcome one into my mind? A snake inside my home would be easy to get away from, simply go out and shut the door. A snake in the brain is almost impossible to avoid if you give it time to find a place of refuge.
When you least expect it, there it will sit hissing at you. I do not wait until its tail passes by then grab it and sling it out the nearest exit. I feel its approach and aim a cannon in its direction. First glance and its mince meat, and all the gore is blown back out into the darkness from which it came. Birds need lots of space to soar and safe places to land. A snake free zone is a perfect place of ease.

THINK ABOUT IT

LET IT GROW

THEN DECIDE

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Joyous Task

2006-05-31T10:18:00.000-07:00

TODAY'S QUOTE:
Set me a task in which I can put something of my very self, and it is a task no longer; it is joy; it is art.
Bliss Carman (1861-1929) Poet

This is my joyous task and always has been. I began it for my sake, but continue it for others. I think as I write here, so I could gain just as much for myself by being silent. I know the power of words to wound or soothe and I aim mine at the wounded to soothe wherever possible.
My life is made richer by the time I spend here, although not in money. In reality my toil here has cost me dearly in that realm. The riches comes in friendships forged and comfort given that is returned to me in ways that make my soul rejoice.
Do I consider it an art? Well, yes in its own way I suppose it is. Each soul has something of beauty to share with the world, and this is my slice of soul laid bare for public consumption.

THINK ABOUT IT

LET IT GROW

THEN DECIDE

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Sensible Options

2006-05-30T10:15:00.000-07:00

TODAY'S QUOTE:
Pain is inevitable. Suffering is optional.
M. Kathleen Casey

Life is overflowing with things to agonize over, but the amount of time you spend banging your head against an immovable object is your choice. Shit happens, people change, players use and abuse, parents fail, children screw up, friends prove false, the list of reasons to be melancholy is seemingly endless. Giving into the negative emotions that any heartache inspires is all too easily accomplished by just drifting wherever they push you.
Too near the edge is not a safe place to abandon yourself to the push of doom. Free-falling into disaster is no way to live, but some of us do it all the time. Things with the power to wound keep on doing so as long as we give them free rein. Learning then moving on puts the power where it belongs. Old hurts will only stay fresh if we constantly pick at them with our thoughts.
It may be harder in the short term to wrestle the negative into silence, but it saves the long term for really living. Do not make the frog prince a king by renting him space in your mind. Do not let a less than perfect childhood keep doing damage your whole life long. Do not let a liar make you blind to truth, or a false love make you doubt a true one exists.
You cannot live a pain free life, but your suffering is mind made after a certain point. What sense is it to let yourself bleed forever for something that someone else did to you, when soon they hardly remember your name. I forgive myself for being human enough to be easily wounded, then I forgive the one who hurt me. I do not forget the pain or its source, but I refuse to let anyone make me bitter or jaded toward life. With some forethought and a bit of luck one pain will help me avoid another. Hurt whenever you must, but suffer as little as possible.

THINK ABOUT IT

LET IT GROW

THEN DECIDE

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Sometimes Sources

2006-05-26T10:01:00.000-07:00

TODAY'S QUOTE:
Sometimes your joy is the source of your smile, but sometimes your smile can be the source of your joy.
Thich Nhat Hanh

What came first the chicken or the egg? In the long and short of it, it does not matter the order of conception. When you are smacking your lips over an omelet the last thing that comes to mind is the source of the egg. Ewwww! When a smile graces your face or gets passed to someone else's, the order in which it appeared is not a consideration either; it just feels too damn good to ponder it in that fashion.
I know for true that if you perform an act it will bring it to fact level in the blink of an eye. I often smile when I would rather frown, because giving into the negative would make a mess of my equilibrium in no time flat. Negatives use up too much precious space, but positives expand as they go. Smiling when you would rather frown just confuses the hell out of any lurking scowl. All too soon the grin will be soul deep and not simply pasted on.
The first person who smiles back will give you a real reason to be doing so. It seems simple because it is; frankly speaking, most things in life are less complicated then we like to think. All too often people imagine tasks more difficult so they have a valid excuse not to attempt them. There is simply no excuse good enough for not smiling as often as possible.

THINK ABOUT IT

LET IT GROW

THEN DECIDE

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Just Be Happy

2006-05-25T08:15:00.000-07:00

TODAY'S QUOTE:
Now and then it's good to pause in our pursuit of happiness and just be happy.
Guillaume Apollinaire, 1880-1918, French Poet and Writer

The search for happiness is often so frantic that we rush by the very things that would guarantee its place in our lives. We imagine it has to do with riches, or possessions, but none of that brings any lasting satisfaction. Money is man made and so are the things it can buy. Happiness has no price.
It is a state of mind, not something you can find in a store, or deposit in a bank account. You cannot order it from a catalog. It cannot be stolen from someone else and worn by you, trying that will cost more dearly than the imagination can conceive. Happiness cannot be trapped or snuck up on. The fastest does not win it like a trophy and the slowest does not lose it by default.
The situations of your life and the people who inhabit it cannot take it from you for long, unless you allow it, or give it to you in any lasting fashion. Moments of joy are not the same as real happiness, which comes from inside and radiates outward. The simplest things teach us the most important lessons about real happiness. The best way to achieve it is to give it away moment by precious moment.
The spring is an internal one, fed by the soul in a never ending flow. Once discovered it never dries up, although it does slow down during times of worry and stress. Look inside, it is there just waiting for you to tap its resources. It will not come find you, but if you want it badly enough it will certainly meet you half way.

THINK ABOUT IT

LET IT GROW

THEN DECIDE

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If You Want Happiness

2006-05-24T10:27:00.000-07:00

TODAY'S QUOTE:
If you want happiness for an hour... take a nap. If you want happiness for a day... go fishing. If you want happiness for a month... get married. If you want happiness for a year... inherit a fortune. If you want happiness for a lifetime... help others.
Chinese proverb

The happiness of an hour is not the same sort as lifetime happiness. Nobody is happy all the time, no matter who they are. Some of us are mostly always happy no matter the circumstances. Some are happy from time-to-time if they have reason to be. Some are never happy no matter how good their fortune. Happiness is different for each of us and the lack of it is on our shoulders too.
I try to find reason to be happy, even if I have to search for it. I always discover something to be joyful about. Reasons to be unhappy are often so bright that they make it hard to see beyond them, but I learned long ago that focusing there only shuts out any opportunity to feel bliss. Nothing makes me happier than reaching in my pocket, grabbing an extra smile, dusting it off, and handing it to someone who does not have one of their own.
We have such power to improve the outlook of everyone we touch, and when you lift someone else up you rise too. See someone frowning, give them a smile. See someone struggling, give them a hand. Notice someone too near the edge, guide them to a safer spot. Come upon the unaware, toss them a hint of what it is to soar no matter where you are. Let the chances you have to make the world a gentler place be the locations where you seek your own happiness and you will never be disappointed.

THINK ABOUT IT

LET IT GROW

THEN DECIDE

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Attempted Courage

2006-05-23T10:25:00.000-07:00

TODAY'S QUOTE:
What would life be if we had no courage to attempt anything?
Vincent Van Gogh

The answer to that is a no-brainer, if nothing is ever attempted then nothing is ever gained. Losses would be final. By the time adulthood was reached we would all be hopelessly entombed in lives little better than walking death. Progress on the planet and inside ourselves would be unheard of, and pointless would be the best that could be said about living.
Life is not like that; sure bad comes and with it all sorts of headaches and heartaches, but with a bit of luck and some valor anything can be overcome. Not easily... certainly some things take back-breaking effort. Not quickly... a lot of time went into getting yourself into any kind of corner. Not blindly... without looking where you are headed it is a sure bet that you will end up more caught in a trap from each step taken.
Courage does not mean the absence of fear. You can be trembling like a leaf in the breeze and still be courageous. It takes a ton of it to act in spite of the fear you feel. Each terror I have ever faced in my whole life has been less frightening face-to-face than what my imagination warned me it would be. The ones I ran from only chased me. The ones I ignored attacked me while I slumbered. The ones I stood toe-to-toe with always shrunk in equal measure to my rising up.
Bravery is not as hard as it seems when you realize that what you fear is unequal to the human spirit. Whatever happens it is always better to attempt courage and try to get past the bogeyman. He will not just vanish because you wish him away, but he will cut and run most times when you call his bluff.

THINK ABOUT IT

LET IT GROW

THEN DECIDE

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Begin Again

2006-05-22T10:22:00.000-07:00

TODAY'S QUOTE:
It is possible to begin again. It is hard, and we never do it perfectly, but it can be done.
Andrew Greeley

If rebirth was not a possibility this world would be such a dreary place. A landscape where the soil could not support new growth would stay the same in such a negative fashion, with only the damage from nature or man being the only alterations possible. Starting over is always just a decision away. Simply put, if you want it badly enough rebirth is inevitable.
No...it is not an easy task, nothing worth having ever is effortless. If you want ease kick back in a recliner and do nothing, life will gladly pass you on by without a second glance. Time marches on no matter how we wish it only crawled. We do not have to be actively involved for the clock to tick, but it is always advisable to at least periodically make note of its passing.
Oblivion is man made. We create it for comfort. We build it for safety. We construct it of strong stuff to keep the bad weather out, but in the process we block out the sunbeams. Without illumination our core can not support new growth, all its energy is needed for keeping the walls repaired. In the dark bitterly cold interior of a mans soul there is no joy without the hope of replanting a fallow field and watching it grow.
New shoots need rain, they can not hope to live otherwise, but sunlight is also a requirement to their survival. A healthy plant must get a good measure of both so its roots can sink deeply enough to stand a chance when the breeze becomes a mighty gale. The withstanding of gales thickens the stalk so it can support the fruit it is meant to produce. All things have a reason and a season. The season of rebirth is different for every man, and the yield is up to whatever is invested in the plot we each plant.

THINK ABOUT IT

LET IT GROW

THEN DECIDE

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Optional War

2006-05-21T10:19:00.000-07:00

TODAY'S QUOTE:
"Conflict is inevitable, but combat is optional."
Max Lucado

The chances for battle are constant; if no easy reason lays about, some people have no trouble creating one out of nothing. I know many who love drama and strife so much that they rush from here to there, burning bridges and burying land mines. I do not happen to be one of them. I resent any time they spend in my precious space, because of the debris they leave scattered all about. I have found it much easier to avoid contact to a level high enough to make them realize that the path to my heart is not down trouble street.
If fighting solved anything I would not struggle against putting up my dukes, but when the dust settles the emotions that created the strife are only intensified by the battle. Two wounded people are much less likely to have a meeting of the minds. An honest debate is one thing, bitch-slapping is quite another. The choice is always ours to make and the risk ours to take, but something that costs so much should give something in return.
All the major battles I fight are within myself. I struggle daily to fill my life with some new knowledge of self, adding at least a small measure to the facts I gather on my journey. I try not to beat myself up too much for the missteps I sometimes take. I force my heart to forgive, so there is room for love. I smother negative thoughts, so positive ones have plenty of room for growth. I battle my own fears and limitations. I do not have time to fight you, I am much to busy wrestling alone.
We are only here such a very short time. Spend your time wisely, or it will flow past you like quicksilver and leave you wondering where it all went while you were so busy wasting your every moment on incidentals. If it is so very vital to you to be in a war zone, fight it inside first. You may tire of the pursuit long before you ever turn your attention elsewhere.

THINK ABOUT IT

LET IT GROW

THEN DECIDE

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Humility

2006-05-20T10:16:00.000-07:00

TODAY'S QUOTE:
Humility does not mean you think less of yourself. It means you think of yourself less.
Ken Blanchard

The lack of false pride is a valuable trait, humility encourages us to consider the happiness of others, as well as our own. The truly prideful only understand the grasping of treasures, but know nothing of the letting go. They never understand that when we give we gain a lasting pleasure.
Self-awareness is not a license to be selfish. Knowing what makes you happy is important in the larger picture, because you will never make anyone else smile if you do not know how to do it yourself. Humbleness does not mean you are not important. The humblest cottage can have more comfort than the grandest castle if it is filled with warmth.
It is the inner workings of a clock that make it keep perfect time. We are the same, if something inside is bent and twisted then we are constantly running too fast or too slow. Fast tickers zoom past everything without gaining anything much from the journey, franticly trying to outdistance whatever they are fleeing from. Slow tickers barely function, pushing themselves from one feeble tick to the next while life whizzes on by. Neither condition is mandatory, changing the tempo of your ticking is possible if it is what you really want.
Finding the courage or the energy is not easy, but it is the most worthwhile endeavor you can ever give to yourself and in a real way to the world at large. Tossing out the trash is the first chore in the list of requirements to finding your perfect rhythm. How can a body function or a mind find peace when it is overburdened with debris that only clutters up valuable space. The job may seem overwhelming, but once begun you feel lighter spirited with each mighty toss of the shit you only own because someone else weighed you down with their issues.
Life is what you make of it, so do not simply be what life makes of you. Nothing valuable is easily won, but any internal improvement is worth whatever aches have to be suffered to gain them. Feel neither pride nor shame so totally that they steal the gift of each new day. Feel neither joy nor sorrow so completely that you become blind to what is really important. Balance the good against the bad, tune up what is not running smoothly and true peace of mind is more than possible, it is truly inevitable.

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LET IT GROW

THEN DECIDE

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A Messy Theory

2006-05-19T10:12:00.000-07:00

TODAY'S QUOTE:
My theory on housework is, if the item doesn't multiply, smell, catch on fire or block the refrigerator door, let it be. No one cares. Why should you?
Erma Bombeck (1927-1996)

This is not my attitude, in total, although I do subscribe to a large portion of its message. I am not a neat freak, but I do not bend all the way in the opposite direction either. I just usually do whatever I must to be able to do as I choose.
I try to use my time in a productive manner, doing something I feel driven to do, so there are not too many useless moments stacked together. I do not enjoy looking back upon a day that has no forward motion. Hell, I would rather clean than do nothing at all, but there are so many other things to choose from that take less energy and produce more lasting pleasure.
One of my best friends cleans all the time, with a house full of kids by the time she gets the last room straightened the first one she did is ready to redo. She is a trooper, beginning again in a never ending cycle. She has my respect for her fortitude. I 'spect I would stand like a tyrant over the messy ones, making them put everything back to rights until they learned the hard lesson of cause and effect.
We are a race of extremists, but I am on the fence on this issue. I have messy friends and neat ones, and I can tell you true that I do not love them for the way they clean or if they even do at all. The only ones that will truly judge you by such a shallow measure are not worth the knowing in any case.
I have messy moments and neat ones and I do not like myself more in either role. I truly just do not stress over the little issues of life that mean next to nothing in the long run. If I am remembered when I am gone it will not be because my house gleamed, but that worries me not at all. I get no comfort now from the notion of being recalled with a dust rag or mop in hand when I have left this earthly realm. The chance of that happening is nil, but let my words echo on and I will have served a higher purpose than keeping my corners dust bunny free.

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LET IT GROW

THEN DECIDE

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Flight Training

2006-05-18T10:07:00.000-07:00

TODAY'S QUOTE:
We learn to fly not by becoming fearless, but by the daily practice of courage
Sam Keen

Fear is a natural state; each of us fear at a different level and we also fear different things. The overcoming of fright, fearing but acting in spite of terror, inspires an altered state where all real and spiritual knowledge is not only possible, but also quite inevitable. Being totally frightless is a human impossibility, yet learning how to control the power given to it is essential to a full life.
I have noticed that the hardest fears to overcome are the ones others place inside of you. When you doubt yourself and someone seconds that emotion somehow, a negative is reinforced times two. The more you hear and see it, the more you buy into the bullshit. It is a good thing that I believe any fear can be overcome or I would be a mouse still with a shadow life.
I fear, but I mostly ignore its pull. I fear not really living enough to control the hold it has on me. I refuse to tie myself in knots over what MIGHT happen, knowing that if I begin that process NOTHING will ever be different than it was yesterday. I do not fear the past, its hold ends with each new dawning day. I do not fear the present, it is my reality whatever it may be. I do not fear the future, it would gladly steal my today.
I am careful what I give my energy to. Name something and you give it life. You create or tear down with the words used and the names uttered. I take care not to name what I have not learned how to control within my own space, doing so would only invite defeat. I do not fear defeat, but I certainly will not willingly invite it to occur.
I fly, soaring above the point where fear longs to keep me trapped. I sometimes land hard, but even when I do, I come away from it stronger somehow. Chicken Little has no right to my life, so fear is a domain where I will never live. If I crash land, so what, at least I can say I had the nerve to really soar.

THINK ABOUT IT

LET IT GROW

THEN DECIDED

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True Math

2006-05-17T06:01:00.000-07:00

TODAY'S QUOTE:
Everything you add to the truth subtracts from the truth.
Alexander Solzhenitsyn, Russian Novelist and Nobel Prize Winner

The truth altered or edited is not the truth at all. Hunks of facts spliced together with lame excuses and qualifiers are useless information and can be very damaging to those of us who arrange things according to what they believe to be the truth. Half truths hinder both the teller and the one who swallows it hook, line, and sinker.
Some people tell you what they wish was true, but even good intentions do not excuse the use of an untruth when reality is all that is needed. I never made anyone pay a price for telling me the truth, even if it was a truth I did not like. Better in life to face what is, bravely than swallow any old lie and build a life around it. I cannot understand the mentality that steals a persons life by making them live a lie.
I do not deal in fabrications. I have swallowed poison that I thought was wine, but I only acted upon what someone I trusted told me. Eventually all lies are revealed and eventually all liars will have to answer for their misdeeds. I do not judge them myself, but give it to God to sort out, I figure that way just punishment will be given without my having to waste time and energy on vengeance, since most times a lot of those things have already been spent upon a lost cause.
Stretching the truth produces a lie, white lies are still falsehoods and once trust is broken it takes a huge amount of time and effort to regain lost ground. Resisting the urge to add spice to the truth or placating someone who is only seeking the truth may be difficult at times. The alternative of having to suffer guilt or shame over pain caused by words we say is so much harder in the long run. Really thinking before speaking is the always the best defense.

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LET IT GROW

THEN DECIDE

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History

2006-05-16T05:58:00.000-07:00

TODAY'S QUOTE:
History, despite its wrenching pain, cannot be unlived, but if faced with courage, need not be lived again.
Maya Angelou, American Poet and Writer

This quote gives me hope. Hopefulness is a state of grace that God endows all humans with at birth, but some of us lose the ability from being blindsided by heartache too often. I guess I am stubborn or too idealistic to buy into the idea that I deserve to just live a life of constant reliving of past blunders. I hope I can always learn enough from my mistakes to not make some of them over and over endlessly.
I hope. I seem to have a well of hope inside of me that never goes dry. If I face the past boldly then I will not be required to sing it over and over like a skipping record. What was does not have to be what is, unless we are determined to keep it. Some hug their heartache then bellow ouch endlessly. I say, "SHIT THAT HURT" then try to avoid stumbling over that same thing again.
I do not always succeed, which tells me that I have more to learn about what makes me tick. I take another long hard look if it is a mistake I have made before. I have so much to learn, it seems a bloody waste to keep learning the same thing over and endlessly over. Some lessons are just hard won. You cannot unlive your mistakes or undo misdeeds just by examining them, but you can learn what your weakest point is by looking over the past and taking notice of where you trip most often.
History is a body of knowledge of past events, better to learn from than repeat as if we are caught in a time warp. Tomorrow is another day, why live it as you did during an unhappy yesterday?? It is easier to avoid a pitfall than it is to climb out of it, but until you admit your own responsibility in digging the hole it is impossible to fill it. Learn then move on.

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LET IT GROW

THEN DECIDE

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Direction Of Movement

2006-05-15T05:55:00.000-07:00

TODAY'S QUOTE:
The greatest thing in this world is not so much where we stand as in what direction we are moving.
Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

The direction of movement is the most important thing; one step forward can change where we stand for good or ill. Some of us never see past the spot where we rest, some are so satisfied there or frightened of change that they never move much at all, others never hold still. Some know where they are headed, while others never have a clue. Some stand frozen, some spin in place, some follow whoever is just ahead, and some lead the way.
Having no direction means being satisfied with heading wherever the breeze blows, and it gets mighty windy sometimes. If you would not run out and invite a tornado to lift you up and deposit you where it chooses why allow life to toss you about. Blow into your own sails and see how far you can go in the direction of your choosing.
The path we travel is not always the one we dream of being on when we are children playing at being grown up. When I married I believed that happily ever after came next. Oh boy, what a rude awakening that was, and I simply continued being rudely awakened for twenty years. What a clueless moron I seemed, although deep inside I knew better, I just kept with a program that almost destroyed me and certainly damaged a couple of my children in ways I could have avoided. Looking back is painful from the vantage point I am at now, but at the time I was doing the best I could with the mind set I had. Fools mean well and I will admit that I was certainly a fool. The sad part is that being foolish reappears from time to time.
I do not wear a sign that says in bold letters "I BELIEVE LIARS" yet some pretty good ones have outwitted me in my lifetime. The fact that not all that long ago I placed my future in the hands of another one tells me that I am far from being immune to the poison they can inject. The last lesson was so brutal that I will never forget its sting. He derailed my train, but in the end he will pay a much larger price than I did. I forgave him for my own sake though I doubt he will ever forgive himself. A person has to make right the things they do to earn their own forgiveness, and I figure the odds on that are astronomical.
The moment I gave the tornado the point position I was holding on to a string and powerless to control my direction. Never again will I place my dreams in anyone else's hands to manipulate. Getting back on track took some doing and the path behind me has debris scattered everywhere, but this train is speeding away from the wreckage fueled by determination to stay on the right path or die trying.
My direction is the overcoming of obstacles and the living as fully as possible this life I have. I may seem naive at times, but it is my nature to believe the best of everyone till I am proven wrong, which I often am. Why do I persist in keeping the faith when all around me is solid proof that to do so will land me face down in some pile of dirt or another? I would rather believe in the good I see in people, even if I have to squint to see it than give my heart over to the bitterness that comes of pessimism. The only way to outdistance our mistakes is to travel on. Listen closely and you will hear my whistle blowing in the distance as I speed on by. Happiness is not a destination, but a state of mind. This train is traveling constantly forward toward every sunrise, keeping the past forever behind the caboose. My direction it forward, come what may.

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LET IT GROW

THEN DECIDE

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The Biggest Adventure

2006-05-14T16:09:00.000-07:00

TODAY'S QUOTE:
The biggest adventure you can ever take is to live the life of your dreams.
Oprah Winfrey

Man oh man...What a delight that is to contemplate. It is a much greater reality than even the most vivid imagination could ever conjure up. The life of my dreams was always pretty simple. I just longed to have the right to be me without being blamed for it as if it was some crime that deserved punishment. I have reached a point where I am easy in my own mind about who I am and if others do not approve I survive without the torment I once felt.
I am far from perfect, but I am certainly better than I could have been from all the damage that has been done to me in the name of love. I never in my life demanded that anyone be anything other than what they were to deserve my affection. I never returned hurt for hurt, I just kept loving blindly and that has been my biggest crime. To finally have the life of my dreams I had to accept myself in the same way, flaws and all.
I dream on paper every day, my mind demands release and I attempt to share the good and bad as example or warning to all who come in contact with me. I demand that my pain produce some good somehow then I kick it aside and go on. The overcoming is the life of my dreams, and living it is magical no matter where I am.
Pain is not a place, but some spots hold the memory of it and keep it more alive if you linger there. Unresolved agony keeps on taking its toll as long as you are determined to carry it with you. The life of my dreams is not pain free, but it is worth the pinches. The footsteps taken to find where you belong often include places where you trip and fall. To me it is not the stumbles that matter all that much, it is the fact that I refuse to stand frozen in spite of my fear that is the most important factor to being satisfied with whatever I have.
I once was certain that my life would remain the nightmare that others seemed to demand I suffer through. Now I know differently. Life is what you make of the bull shit that is tossed your way. Once upon a time I built a pretty prison out of mine, now I light each chunk to illuminate my way past the stink. To me that is progress and a life that moves forward is the life of my dreams.

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THEN DECIDE

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The As If Treatment

2006-05-13T20:10:00.000-07:00

TODAY'S QUOTE:
Treat people as if they were what they ought to be, and you'll help them to become what they are capable of becoming.
Goethe

I have found this to be true, from both sides of the fence. I like the quote very much, because it validates a concept I realized from first hand experience and try to practice in my relationships. Treating people as if they are faith worthy is a special kind of validation and encourages the best possible behavior. Gentle persuasion is such a positive thing and makes us all better people.
We have no power to change others by force and no right to try, but many use that method in different degrees. When we push against someone they usually do one of three things; they either pretend to do what we want, close down altogether, or push back. None of these options bring about anything lasting or positive.
The "as if" treatment encourages without demanding. People will do things to please you that they never even realized they were capable of. Nobody likes to disappoint someone who is not constantly judging their every move. Faith given in a positive fashion makes it much easier for someone to have belief in themselves. True faith in yourself is empowering and often it begins with someone else's faith in you pushing you on. I know this to be true. Thank you, Charity for my first lessen in the "as if" treatment, and thanks to all who believe in me now.

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LET IT GROW

THEN DECIDE

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Rights Of Consumption

2006-05-12T20:07:00.000-07:00

TODAY'S QUOTE:
We have no more right to consume happiness without producing it than to consume wealth without producing it.
George Bernard Shaw

This quote is profound and should make us all remember that any happiness we obtain at the cost of anyone else's torment is tainted and will cost us dear in the end. Every tear we cause out of greed or injustice will be put on our final bill in one fashion or another. The world is full of sharks who eat all they encounter and I get much comfort from knowing that they will pay a higher price for living than the innocence they consume with such pleasure.
I wonder what causes a person to become a shark? Nature or nurture? Are some born predators or is there a process of pain that shapes them into thinking the rest of us are shark bait? I have been eaten, spit out then eaten again often enough to know the intense pain of being someone else's meal. With me it has always been ones who swear their undying love that have done the dirty deed of showing me their stomach lining. Beware of sharks who love you. They not only gulp you down but also eat your young if they can.
I do not hate sharks, even the two who left their teeth marks upon my heart did not earn any hatred from my direction. I mostly feel sorry for them, because they waste their life in a pursuit that kills their own souls. I hate the acts they do. I hate the waste and ugliness they surround themselves with. I hate knowing the water is infested, but to hate them would make them winners.
The ones who chewed here did not put me belly up, they slowed me down some and made me cry for a time, but defeat me..never. I am a stronger swimmer because I shared the water with them. And when they are beached with a crowd of angry victims surrounding them I wont be among the screaming masses there. I was a bright little fish who traveled on and they will never forget how I glistened as I swam. I will not go back to see more pain even if it is theirs. I wish them no pain, I wish them the peace they will never have that I possess in abundance and tried to share with them.

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THEN DECIDE

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Rest Relations

2006-05-11T20:04:00.000-07:00

TODAY'S QUOTE:
Rest is a good thing, but boredom is its brother.
Voltaire, 1694-1778, French Writer and Philosopher

The relationship between rest and boredom is kissing cousin close, but I do not suffer from bouts of the latter. I think it is because my mind is rarely allowed to rest, no matter what the rest of me is doing. I enjoy the simple process of thought so intensely that I am forever entertained. Another possible reason is all the years I spent isolated with no hope of doing anything very interesting.
It was better to learn how not to hunger for what I felt I could never hope to eat. I did not spend my time with my nose pressed against the windows of my imagination finding reasons to be dissatisfied. I learned to experience intense pleasure at the smallest thing, because small things was all I had. Now that my options are wide open, I carry that ability with me. I get all I can out of everything I do.
I sometimes wish for more than is offered, but I accept reality and go on without a mighty struggle to capture what is not willingly given. I do not let what I want devalue what I possess. I am not made bored by what is, by obsessing on what could be. Giving careful attention to every moment lengthens it, so the wondrous ones are electric. My energy wraps around them and sucks them dry of every drop of joy I can possibly feel.
We are a race of thrill seekers. Fun has to be orchestrated, and next weeks installment has to be better than the last or we feel like its not good enough. I watch the frantic search for pleasure of some of my fellow travelers and am glad I do not buy into their ideas of bigger is better.
Bigger is relative. Learning to get a bigger thrill out of a smaller thing is a huge lesson of immense benefit to all students. Study it well, pass it on then boredom will be a much less destructive force. Dissatisfaction begins in the ocean of the mind and poisons all the little fish that brighten our journey.

THINK ABOUT IT

LET IT GROW

THEN DECIDE

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Each Day

2006-05-10T19:59:00.000-07:00

TODAY'S QUOTE:
Each day comes bearing its gifts. Untie the ribbons.
Ann Ruth Schabader

The way you unwrap the day foretells what you will gain from the living of it. If you hate its dawning, you will rough handle it. If you love daybreak you will embrace it gently. I am always happy to have a new beginning, most mornings lately I am smiling wide before my eyes are even open. I untie the ribbons slowly, and unwrap the gift with special care as not to rip the pretty paper surrounding it. I am well aware that each day is either enriched or spoiled by the seasoning we put on it.
Anything you face with an angry heart and sour attitude is the master of you by default. The hateful things lose their hold when you adjust the way you view their importance. If you hate something that cannot hate you back or feel your spite then what is the point of doing it? If you cannot change it then outwit it internally. Pointless living is soooo...ummm...pointless. Duh!!! Why waste time feeling intense negative emotions over unchangeable realities?
Change it if you can, accept it if you cannot. Rise above it, tunnel under, go around but do not be simply satisfied to let it eat you alive. Face it with grace and you put it in its place. Face it with spite and you give it all the rights. It owns you and steals all it can. Each day is a gift, do not feed it to vultures.
Untie the ribbons slowly with as big a smile as you can summon up. At first try it may be tiny and uncertain. Carefully undo the taped places on the fragile wrappings that surround the gift of one more chance. Let your eyes linger on all the beauty that lays within, ignoring the negatives that tell you why you are not worthy of having such a present. Push away all the things that try to soil what is brand new with left over dirt from all the yesterdays wasted or forsaken.
Each day is a new life waiting to be really lived. Face it, embrace it, own your space, savor the moments, dying will come all too soon, no need to help it along. Love the day enough to validate its dawning with some measure of pleasure and it will return the favor somehow amid all the clutter. But you have to be farsighted enough to seek what is sometimes hidden.

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THEN DECIDE

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No Pessimist

2006-05-09T19:57:00.000-07:00

TODAY'S QUOTE:
"No pessimist ever discovered the secret of the stars, or sailed to an uncharted land, or opened a new doorway for the human spirit."
Helen Keller

I am always astounded by the wisdom of this blind, deaf, and speechless woman. It makes me a bit sad to think that others with all five senses live their whole lives in a mostly senseless fashion. She was brilliant, imprisoned by health issues, but she found a way to give the world the treasures of her dark silent kingdom. She fought for every inch while others waste the gifts she never possessed. Right on Helen, again and again your words echo, even though they were silently said so long ago.
I am an optimist by nature and by choice, but I have always been attracted to pessimists. My husband was so pessimistic that it kept him firmly in place his whole lifetime. In our later years together some of my optimism rubbed off, but not enough so that he could produce it without my prompting. Hope would not have made his life longer, but it would have made it much richer.
I have unshakable faith in the power of tomorrow. I have belief in everyone's ability to tap into deep wells of energy that lay hidden under the useless things we gather and pile up inside of us. I have hope, because a hopeless life is no life at all. Helen knew by nature, and spent her whole life trying to teach the masses to reach their true potential. She had to overcome odds that would defeat most. The things most of us have to surmount are obstacles we place in our own way.
Hoping can be learned. Belief can be developed. Faith can be discovered. An act soon becomes fact if given the exercise it needs to become strong. Negative natural traits can be curbed and new ways of reacting can be learned. Even the toughest meat can be tenderized with the right handling. Habits come in all flavors, distasteful ones do not have to be ingested forever. Some can be outgrown, some can be outlived, and most can be outwitted. The choice is yours to make. Enlightenment is so empowering. Flip on the light and see all the gifts you possess then use them.
Helen was trapped and she found a way out. My God, if she could do so much with so little how much are we capable of??? Why leave it up to chance??? Why let life be only something that happens to you??? Why not happen to it??? I do, and I am forever optimistic that tomorrow will be better in some fashion than yesterday. Sometimes the improvement is hard to find, but there is always something to be happy about. I would much rather spend my time digging up one small treasure than just sit idle and let myself be buried in bullshit.

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LET IT GROW

THEN DECIDE

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A Necessary Start

2006-05-08T19:54:00.000-07:00

TODAY'S QUOTE:
Start by doing what's necessary, then what's possible, and suddenly you are doing the impossible.
Saint Francis

Actions tumble one against the next if given just a bit of encouragement, like dominoes one act prompts another until the whole deed, or a series of them are accomplished. I have found it very helpful to use tunnel vision whenever possible to allow this option to work its magic. Somehow it is much easier to get things done if I do not look at the mountain that needs climbed, but concentrate upon the next step to be taken.
Looking too far ahead can be overwhelming, so why insure defeat? Confidence in your ability to succeed is a great mountain climbing tool, but it is not simply handed out to everyone, it must be earned by degrees. Every journey begins with a first step; long trips take more time to reach a destination than short ones do, but both require the same starting point.
Necessities are required actions, you may put them off if it suits you, yet they will not simply go away just because you do not act upon them. Usually they build momentum and derail you if they are ignored long enough. There is an effort that goes into no effort at all and its one I just hate. The strength it takes to force a bothersome detail out of my head is most times much more costly than just biting the bullet and getting it done.
Once the gotta do's are out of the way then we can pick something to attempt that requires some imagination. The wanna do's are a lot more enjoyable than the gotta do's and they give so much more than the obvious. Memories of the most vivid sort come from the wanna do's and in the end it is much better to have a hefty wanna do list, with many of them crossed off, even if all of them do not turn out as imagined.
In my golden years I will have a long list of gotta do's that I accomplished. I will also have an endless list of wanna do's that I gave my all to, which hopefully should limit my wish I'd done this or that list to very few. What better reason to push that first domino over than the chance of reaching a point of few regrets.
I got notice of a new flash movie, so I am adding a link here for it. The message is worth the view. Enjoy, I did!
http://www.inspiringthots.net/movie/train-life.php

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The Race

2006-05-07T19:52:00.000-07:00

TODAY'S QUOTE:
The race is not always to the swift, but to those who keep on running.
Anonymous

Determination counts more than speed in this mad race that is life. Outside forces push and pull at us to conform, but it is the inner power that gets us to the finish line and dictates what shape we are in when we get there. Speed is not the deciding factor, it is perseverance that most often crowns the winner.
Racing madly is not really living, flying by things of great importance only causes us to miss seeing scenery that might benefit our understanding of ourselves and others. Enlightenment is the trophy for any well run race, even the slowest to cross the finish line can claim this prize.
The speedy and the greedy may reach there before I do. I stopped caring about most of the contests that either would enter, because their rules of fair play are so different from what I am comfortable with. In some areas I can run with the big dogs and others I do not care to even try. I get some enjoyment knowing that if they tried to outlast me on my home track they would not have a chance in hell of going the distance.
We each have our own laps, landscapes that only we know, miles that only we travel. Mine leads me many places, but wherever I go I carry Journey's End with me. It is a state of mind and a way of life that encompasses many things and countless people. The past echoes here, but does not control the future. This is my center and as long as I keep its diminutions within sight I am sure to finish the race a winner, no matter my speed of travel.

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Distinguished Dreams

2006-05-05T00:07:00.000-07:00

TODAY'S QUOTE:
"All men and women are born, live suffer and die; what distinguishes us one from another is our dreams, whether they be dreams about worldly or unworldly things, and what we do to make them come about... We do not choose to be born. We do not choose our parents. We do not choose our historical epoch, the country of our birth, or the immediate circumstances of our upbringing. We do not, most of us, choose to die; nor do we choose the time and conditions of our death. But within this realm of choicelessness, we do choose how we live."
Joseph Epstein

Well, amen to that mouthful of solid truth. Birth itself is choiceless, and our origins are like grabbags, take what you get and make the most of it. We are not all blessed with equal birthrights, either; some of us are born into tragedy, some into poverty, some into prosperity, and some are given extra heavy burdens to carry due to health issues, but all of us dream in one form or another.
There are people who never lift anything heavier than a thought toward making any dream come true, and there are those who never stop attempting to give life to their imaginings. There are those who never believe and those who never have a doubt. What puts us into one group or the other is our attitude and that is something that can be changed as our awareness of its power becomes clear.
I once simply adopted whatever was placed upon me by others, at least outwardly. I studied the actions of loved ones and excused bad behavior I never would commit myself. I formed opinions I never voiced. I accepted crumbs as if that was all I deserved. I was not aware of how much of my silent sorrow was caused by my own attitude. I dreamed of better days but did little to make that my reality.
I thought I had no choice when truly I held all the keys to the kingdom. Each of us holds our own, yet many of us never realize how we set the stage for how we are treated by how much value we place in our own worth. How we react or if we react at all sets the perimeters of our relationships, and the most important friendship we ever have really ought to be with ourselves.
Once we alter our attitude it is a sure bet that our dreams will become more than just distant longings of things we wish were true. They become vivid blueprints of what surly will be if we put some effort into making it happen. Life itself is a gift and how we unwrap it is up to us. Handing it to someone else then complaining about how they abuse it makes no sense, but all too often that is done in the name of love.
Real love does not seek to control, it only hungers to share. Words said that contain no actions to back them are simply words said and nothing more. I learned this over and over, but I know it by heart now. I dreamed of possessing unconditional love. It was only a dream until I gave it to myself first then it became a reality in its own fashion. My attitude toward myself has made my life richer and it spawned a dream that is acted upon here.
I received the following email and place it here to illustrate how the smallest kindness can inspire someone to keep dreaming. Thank you, June!

A GLASS OF MILK

One day, a poor boy who was selling goods from door to door to pay his way through school, found he had only one thin dime left, and he was hungry. He decided he would ask for a meal at the next house. However, he lost his nerve when a lovely young woman opened the door. Instead of a meal he asked for a drink of water. She thought he looked hungry so she brought him a large glass of milk.
He drank it slowly, and then asked, "How much do I owe you?"
"You don't owe me anything," she replied "Mother taught us never to accept pay for a kindness"
He said ... "Then I thank you from my heart."
As Howard Kelly left that house, he not only felt stronger physically, but his faith in God and man was strong also. He had been ready to give up and quit.
Many year's later that same young woman became critically ill. The local doctors were baffled. They finally sent her to the big city, where they called in specialists to study her rare disease. Dr. Howard Kelly was called in for the consultation. When he heard the name of the town she came from, a strange light filled his eyes.
Immediately he rose and went down the hall of the hospital to her room. Dressed in his doctor's gown he went in to see her. He recognized her at once. He went back to the consultation room determined to do his best to save her life. From that day he gave special attention to her case. After a long struggle, the battle was won. Dr. Kelly requested the business office to pass the final bill to him for approval. He looked at it, then wrote something on the edge and the bill then sent it to her room.
She feared to open it, for she was sure it would take the rest of her life to pay for it all. Finally she looked, and something caught her attention on the side of the bill. She read these words .. "Paid in full with one glass of milk" (Signed) Dr. Howard Kelly.
Tears of joy flooded her eyes as her happy heart prayed: "Thank You, God, that Your love has spread broad through human hearts and hands."
There's a saying which goes something like this: Bread cast on the waters comes back to you. The good deed you do today may benefit you or someone you love at the least expected time. If you never see the deed again at least you will have made the world a better place - And, after all, isn't that what life is all about?
The hardest thing to learn in life is which bridge to cross and which--to burn

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Every Strike

2006-05-04T00:03:00.000-07:00

TODAY'S QUOTE:
Every strike brings me closer to the next home run.
Babe Ruth (1895-1948)

The cycles of life are like that; good follows bad, and bad follows good in a never ending fashion, as it really should if you think about it logically. Too many of us just toss the bat into the dirt and walk off the field when continuing to swing brings us ever closer to the home run we all hunger to achieve.
If practice makes perfect in anything we attempt to master, why are we so determined to quit before we get to pro level? I think some stop because it is hard to keep trying and they would rather be layed back in a recliner with the remote. I know some get hurt too often to make it seem like a smart act to keep on beating what they view as a dead horse. Some buy into what others say about their ability. Some just vegetate, without need of anyone or anything outside their tight little safe circle.
I view the bad as lessons. I view the good as rewards. I view myself as worthy of a home run, so I just keep batting while I still possess the strength to swing the bat. To do less would mean I feel I do not deserve to play at all, and I will never allow that thought to gather strength and zap my resolve to really live as fully as possible.
I know I am bound to strike out from time-to-time. The odds of always hitting the mark at every swing are zero percent, but every honest attempt brings some measure of hope for success. To not bat at all means I would have to simply stand on home plate and watch the ball wizz by and lose my turn by default. What a sad image that produces in a mind that refuses to just stand on the sidelines watching others play the game.
I choose to keep slugging, not because it is easy, but because it is the only sure way to achieve any measure of true pleasure from what is too often a brutal game. Life is bitter-sweet enough without me adding to the bitter by not valuing the sweet enough to risk another defeat. Losing by not trying is not a fate that will ever belong to me.

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I Would Rather Live

2006-05-03T00:00:00.000-07:00

TODAY'S QUOTE:
I would rather live in a world where my life is surrounded by mystery than live in a world so small that my mind could comprehend it.
Harry Emerson Fosdick

My life overflows with mysterious possibilities, but only because I do not limit myself to the mundane. I challenge, I question, and I explore whatever is happening inside of me and whatever life offers with the same gusto. I lived a life so stifling, for such a very long time, I just naturally rebel against walls of any sort. I climb the ones that try to keep me out and knock down the ones that try to fence me in.
I do not hold myself safe and secure within boundaries placed as markers of lines never to be crossed. I do not fear the unknown, but welcome it as a great alternative to the same old tired actions repeated by rote. I ask more of myself than rut walking, I demand that life gives me more than it takes. I push when necessary and tug when possible, always paying special attention to each moment as if it were my last.
Little pleasures are magnified and slowed to a pace that seems to lengthen each delight. My memory holds a magical scrapbook of snapshots taken as I have challenged life to give me all it can. I could have just as easily compiled one filled to overflowing with flashes of the bitter disappointments I have suffered, mostly silently. Somehow celebrating my defeats does not seem a very good use of my time, so I keep the lesson and delete the image as soon as I no longer need it to highlight what needs to be learned.
A mind left to wander where it will usually lingers upon the negatives. The brain is a wonderful thing to explore and magical in its power to shape what goes on around us with just a bit of prompting. I ask mine to do things in a measured way because I know that each thought pattern holds its own price for use. Any power given to the negative costs dear and any positive delivers treasures beyond the imagination. Control your space using that measure as your guide and unlock your possibilities. I did and have found a place of happiness that nothing negative can touch. The trip here was brutal, but the destination was worth every ounce of agony suffered to get to this point.

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Compensate And Console

2006-05-02T23:57:00.000-07:00

TODAY'S QUOTE:
Imagination was given to us to compensate for what we are not; a sense of humor was given to us to console us for what we are.
Mark McGinnis

The imagination can be a wonderful tool, but it can also be used as a crutch when reality is not wholly to our liking. We can trick ourselves into believing the most unlikely of things with just a tweak or two upon the dial between hopes and desires. Wishes are not reality. Longing is not fact. Dreams take more than the having of them to come true.
Sometimes actions of our own are all that is required, sometimes other people hold the key to the door between the imagined and the factual. The former is the best bet; if real effort is put into it we can be certain to reach some level of success. When it depends upon someone else the results are unpredictable.
I have had so many lessons of this sort in my lifetime, making it impossible to give my energy wholly to any imagining that involves anyone else. Some measure of fantasy is impossible to dismiss, but I am most careful nowadays to limit it to its smallest common denominator so that any heartache is as minor as I can make it. Some things are just too hard to swallow in one huge gulp, better to keep the bites small as possible for safety sake.
I do not struggle over-long upon facts that cannot be denied. I allow them to hurt as badly as they need to, before I sooth them with acceptance then I travel on. Tears come, but never in an oceans depth. Sorrow lingers on for as long as it needs to, yet it has to follow me past its place of impact. Life goes on, it must or why bother.

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Two Great Gifts

2006-05-01T23:54:00.000-07:00

TODAY'S QUOTE:
Life offers two great gifts: time and the ability to choose how we spend it. Planning is a process of choosing among those many options. If we do not choose to plan, then we choose to have others plan for us.
Richard I. Winwood

The art of planning is SO important to master; truly if we do not our life is never truly our own. The ability to ride the crest of opportunity is a wonderful thing as well, but without setting your feet on a path of your own choosing it is too much like a crap shoot to be comfortable.
I moved through the first 40 years of my life like a sleepwalker. I was directed first here then there by the people I loved, but it was rarely where I really wanted to go. Words of protest got stuck behind the wall that surrounded me. To speak would have risked their displeasure and lost me my place in their hearts. I THOUGHT!!!
Keeping quiet earned me nothing, certainly not love, and most certainly not any measure of respect. Puppets are played with then put back on the shelf. They are viewed as empty inside, but I was far from empty. I over-flowed with things that nobody knew of and nobody really understood, least of all myself.
Then I awoke!!! Every moment since then has been fully lived. Not always wisely, but always with determination to get something out of it. The bad gave just as much as the good. Brutal times make us examine things in a closer way. When I looked deep I realized that my life was just a shadow walk and I have been determined to light my path with the truth every since October 30, 1993.
Some truths have been ugly, some beautiful, but all have been my own. So use the time you have wisely, both good and bad. Learn from all you experience. Cut the puppet strings if you have them. Really live!!!! I have and have fewer regrets than I used to possess when others moved my feet.

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We Grow Old

2006-04-30T16:00:00.000-07:00

TODAY'S QUOTE:
We grow old as soon as we cease to love and trust.
Madame de Choiseul

The reasons to suspend trust and forsake the quest for love are often overwhelming. I know this from first hand experience. There is nothing quite as painful as a broken heart, but there is nothing quite as joyful as real love. The fear of ending with heartache should make us more careful, yet to allow it to stop us from the attempt altogether is a total waste of a precious organ.
If I had given up long ago, I would have been hurt less often. I am also certain that I would be old and bitter like so many who stop trying long before they reach fulfillment. I would be safe from pain, yet a slave to loneliness. I would have more money, but be poorer by far.
I would be little better than the ones who have wounded me with such deliberate force. I would be an eternal victim to egos who only feed upon the pain they cause others. I would be hard-aged instead of ageless. I would not be me and I would rather be viewed as naive if that is the cost of believing that I am worth loving than simply accepting their estimation that I must pay an extra high price for love that never was worthy of the cost they demanded.
The defect has to belong to them and the price they pay is the loss of my love and trust, not the loss of my belief in its existence. Just because there is no water to be found in one location does not mean that all the earth is water-free and the same can be said for people.

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Fears Path

2006-04-29T15:54:00.000-07:00

TODAY'S QUOTE:
"I must not fear. Fear is the mind-killer. Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration. I will face my fear. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path. Where the fear has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain."
Frank Herbert

This quote is deeply stated and impossible to deny. I must not fear, yet I do. We all fear something, some of us fear many things, and a few fear most everything. In all its forms it cripples in ways nothing else ever will. Feeling it is mandatory, embracing it is voluntary, and the lessons that go into learning the difference between validation and saturation are brutal.
Fear is like a knife that only you have control of, either point it outward and let it clear a path or wave it all around and wound yourself. I choose to point it elsewhere. I face it outward from a wall of determination to really live and it propels me forward. I face it head on when necessary to overstep a stumbling block. I may tremble from head-to-toe all through the exercise of exorcism. I may even continue trembling for a time after I am done with the doing of whatever I feared, but so what if I do? I think dying of fright is unlikely.
I know people who barely live because of the restrictions it places upon them, but they do not seem to struggle much. I suppose they feel safe behind the walls it inspires, yet I thank God every day that I only felt trapped. It isolates us from everything if allowed. It holds us hostage when we let it control our actions or the lack thereof. It steals a life more quickly and completely than anything else. Why load the thiefs get away car with the only real treasures we ever truly possess?

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The Gift Of A Morning

2006-04-28T15:17:00.000-07:00

TODAY'S QUOTE:
What happiness there is when I awake to find near me the gift of a Morning!
Abbie Graham

The morning is such a magical thing to me, every dawning a new life. Whatever yesterday held is past and a new start is always possible. Most days I have a smile on my face before I even open my eyes, because I know that whatever was is done and whatever can be is mostly up to me. Given a choice I want to be happy, so I just choose that way to begin as many mornings as I can manage.
Sometimes things happen that try to rearrange my attitude, but I always make it a mighty struggle for control of what is mine. Make a conscious decision to be happy just because you have another opportunity to get it right, or at least a little righter than you did yesterday and it is really hard to not be at least a little happy. And face it folks isn't a little happy better than the alternative of the flip side. If the choice is yours... and it truly is... why not choose glad over sad or mad?

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Great Beautifiers

2006-04-27T15:15:00.000-07:00

TODAY'S QUOTE:
Cheerfulness and contentment are great beautifiers and are famous preservers of youthful looks.
Charles Dickens, 1812-1870, British Novelist

Gravity gets us all, eventually. Why help it do its damage? A smile lifts the face up. A frown drags it down. Really, just think about it for a second and you will be forced to agree that forcing your profile downward cannot be considered a very intelligent thing to do. The sad spiral does not end there, a heavy spirit makes feet drag and spines curl and a hangdog expression is not the most inviting thing to show to the masses.
A young girl still lives inside of me, in times of happiness she has control of my body. She skips, she giggles, she hides the years and shines from sparkling eyes. When I am sad she hides and the years come to the surface for all to see. Nobody is as horrified by its appearance as I am. I invite her to dance in my shoes. I am determined to live my life looking through her eyes. I am happy in her presence and others are too.
The older one has been wounded by years of heartache. She is part of me, but not the most important part. Her name is Grace and she has seen a lot more than is healthy, but all along the way she shared space with a young girl named Hope. The two walked side-by-side through thick and thin. Whether limping through a valley, or soaring above the clouds they have traveled hand-in-hand.
Grace is the wise one, Hope is the prettier of the two. Struggle on girls, put your best feet forward, and turn a happy face to the world. Make gravity struggle for space. Life takes enough without either of you handing over what is not required. Smile girls, and fight the good fight. Show the world that there is more to life than just the right to survive, there is also the right to thrive. I have Faith that with Grace and Hope anything is possible.

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Last Night's Cornbread

2006-04-26T15:13:00.000-07:00

TODAY'S QUOTE:
You've got to continue to grow, or you're just like last night's cornbread--stale and dry.
Loretta Lynn

Growth is a blessed thing that is too often treated like a chore. Sure, sometimes it sticks its nose into a safe rut and mucks things up. Sometimes it causes system wide panic and discord, replacing hibernation with a sudden total awareness that is almost blinding in its intensity. Change is filled with sensations, both good and bad. Nothing is meant to stagnate, standing water breeds bugs and frozen-in-place people are bugs by default.
They are like a record skipping over the same tired tune over and over. Children go through normal stages of growth; once we reach adulthood that should continue, but too often it just screeches to a sudden stop. I am sure that everyone knows someone who had a favorite time of life that they seem determined to remain inside of even though it is long past. The 60's are used a lot by many such theme role players and although it is entertaining to view them from time-to-time it is sad to think anyone is more fond of moments past than excited about ones yet to come.
If I have to be like a baked item, stale corn bread is a poor choice. I would hope that I am a bit more like angel food cake. It is sweet to taste. It keeps well if wrapped right. It can be topped with many different things and adapts well in the process. And it has such a pretty name... What would you choose? Choose wisely and do not be satisfied to be half-baked. Make life a rich banquet, not simply a meal of leftovers.
I received the following in an email. Enjoy and share!

Near my friends home is a field, with two horses in it.
From a distance, each looks like every other horse. But if you stop your car, or are walking by, you will notice something quite amazing.
Looking into the eyes of one horse will disclose that he is blind. His owner has chosen not to have him put down, but has made a good home for him. This alone is amazing.
If nearby and listening, you will hear the sound of a bell. Looking around for the source of the sound, you will see that it comes from the smaller horse in the field. Attached to her halter is a small bell. It lets her blind friend know where she is, so he can follow her.
As you stand and watch these two friends, you'll see how she is always checking on him, and that he will listen for her bell and then slowly walk to where she is, trusting that she will not lead him astray. When she returns to the shelter of the barn each evening, she stops occasionally and looks back, making sure her friend isn't too far behind to hear the bell.
Like the owners of these two horses, God does not throw us away just because we are not perfect or because we have problems or challenges. He watches over us and even brings others into our lives to help us when we are in need.
Sometimes we are the blind horse being guided by the little ringing bell of those who God places in our lives. Other times we are the guide horse, helping others see.
Good friends are like this. You don't always see them, but you know they are always there.
Please listen for my bell and I'll listen for yours.

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Fountain Use

2006-04-25T15:11:00.000-07:00

TODAY'S QUOTE:
Some people drink from the fountain of knowledge, others just gargle.
Robert Anthony, Think, Think On and Think Again

This is true and very cleverly put; truisms stated with humor are much easier to digest than the dry white bread kind that most times hit home then bounce away without leaving an echo behind. I love the ones that are memorable by the fashion they wear and this one is dressed most delightfully.
Some people are gulpers, some only sip and some just gargle before they then spit. Some of us retain knowledge, some let it go, some of us learn, and some never know. What we ingest is important, but how we take it in changes its flavor. Nothing is truly learned just by rote, nothing is retained that does not enter your throat. So drink hearty from the fountain of life and swallow as much as your system can hold. Real life belongs to the thirsty and success to the bold.

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Wing Building

2006-04-24T15:08:00.000-07:00

TODAY'S QUOTE:
Sometimes you have to take the leap, and build your wings on the way down.
Kobi Yamada

Life inspires all kinds of fears and boundaries, trusting yourself enough to leap over them and risk a hard fall is not an easy task, but the alternative is half a life with no soaring possibilities. I could have let hundreds of hurts and abuses stop my hunger to fly. I could have been content to rut dwell. I could have done as many do and felt so sorry for myself that I spoiled all I touched with the taint of self pity and impotent sorrow, but I did not.
Falling is always a possibility, none of us are guaranteed a fall free life. To attempt anything always has the risk of failure, but to not attempt anything is certain failure by default. What a waste that is to never try or to stop trying because once you fell or a hundred times over you hit the ground. So yeah...so what...one success is worth any number of failures or there would not be lunatics like me still leaping off into the great unknown and hoping for a softer landing.
Beating someone over the head with the results of a failed flight is futile, and it is also a bit neurotic. I hit hard not so long ago, but I do not waste my time on the one who held their arms out and said trust me and jump. He got his pound of flesh and I got the hell away from him. I was at fault too so what good would it do to point fingers now and bellow. Not me!! Let him enjoy someone else's pain he is not privy to mine.
I was delusioned by my own wishes and hopes. I believed when I should not have, but who is the bad one here? Not me so why keep on paying the price for a crash landing. I see others going on and on and endlessly on over less costly flights and I just want to push them off the nearest cliff and show them what a real unexpected crash feels like. Why waste your life moaning about what never was and never will be to someone who never cared as you wanted them to.
I got up and dusted myself off, told the person what I thought then moved on. He heard it once and that was plenty, saying it over and over would not change a blessed thing. I will not give one more moment to a lost cause, there is too much of real value to contemplate to rent space in my head to a fools dreams.
So all you dreaming fools who are stuck at your point of impact, follow me back up to the soaring spot and take flight for a better cause than the one that landed you in a heap. The world has no respect for the cry babies who never make another attempt, but everyone loves the underdog who refuses to stop trying.

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Vulnerable Strength

2006-04-23T15:06:00.000-07:00

TODAY'S QUOTE:
Out of your vulnerabilities will come your strength.
Sigmund Freud

The things that wound us also make us stronger. Overcoming obstacles demands a strength that has to be reached for, nothing comes automatically during this painful process. Limitations are most often self-applied and can only be removed in the same fashion. Determination to get past the past is the sharpest tool we have for digging our way out of any hole we find ourselves trapped inside of and the strength applied will determine just how long we will be stuck there.
It sucks sometimes to be in charge of such things, because it is so much easier to blame others for our issues than it is to take responsibility ourselves. We may like to use the blame game to gain sympathy or assign guilt, but in the end it always rests at our door. To me it seems much more sensible to just take my lumps and go forward no matter who was at fault to begin with. Hell, I would much rather climb a mountain barefoot than stand at its base with a rock in my shoe and cry about a blister that is stopping me from taking any steps at all.
Let your fears make you braver. Let your troubles make you stronger. Let blame be a thing rarely used and forgiveness be a guide out of the dark places we all sometimes find ourselves inside of. Weakness or strength is all up to you, and exercise is the only thing separating the two.

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The Last Analysis

2006-04-22T15:04:00.000-07:00

TODAY'S QUOTE:
In the last analysis, what we are communicates far more eloquently than anything we say or do.
Stephen R. Covey, Author of "The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People"

The last analysis will sum up the total and the echo we leave behind will come from tones that mostly play from this point. Mistakes will be forgiven if we are forgiving of others. Hurts will be comforted if we never meant to cause them and try never to repeat the act that inspired them. Fences will be mended, bridges will be built, and lines will be crossed if we give our attention to adding more than we take away from life and loved ones.
To any who read here that I have hurt it was never my intention to do so. To someone I miss more than I can ever explain, just know that every single day I hold you in my heart with pride at all you have accomplished. We may never speak again, which is something that rips at heart strings, but I will never stop loving you. Take pride in who you are, because I feel that when I think of you.
I am so far from perfect, yet daily I reach toward some better being. I will never stop trying to be more than I am today. I hope in the final analysis that I can measure up to more than I began with.
I received this link in an email and share it with you all. It is a message worth repeating and living.

http://www.inlibertyandfreedom.com/Flash/Think_It_Over.swf

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Rather Become

2006-04-21T15:00:00.000-07:00

TODAY'S QUOTE:
"Try not to become a man of success. Rather become a man of value."
Albert Einstein

Value equates true worth; a man or woman who knows and shows their true worth is successful in ways having nothing to do with piles of money or tons of possessions. I would rather be valuable enough to be valued than successful enough to be wealthy. I would rather become a better person than a richer one.
I have seen clear and horrid examples of what greed does to a human being. I have had chances to follow in their footsteps, hell I have been invited to march beside two such men. The first I convinced to leave that path and stayed by his side. The second I left him to his greedy ways without trying to alter his idea of success. One thing both of them taught me quite clearly is that I cannot live in comfort in a house of greed.
Give me a mate with heart and I will not worry about what else they possess. A true measure of a man is not in what he owns or owes. Rich man, poor man is relative, whatever the greedy think to the contrary. A poor man with a true embrace is worth more to me than a ton of rich ones who only know how to hug dollars. If greed has to be a part of the mix, let him be greedy for my company and I will be greedy for his.

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Despicable Respect

2006-04-20T14:58:00.000-07:00

TODAY'S QUOTE:
Nothing is more despicable than respect based on fear.
Albert Camus, 1913-1960, French Author/Philosopher/Nobel Prize Winner

This should be self-evident and more likely than not it is, yet some of us still dance to the beat of such dreadful drummers as if by default. People who inspire any positive emotion through negative means are expert manipulators. They see themselves as above the rules that apply to everyone else, and when by our actions we prove them right how can we blame them for feeling that way?
Anyone who inspires intense emotional or physical fear should be avoided at all cost, but it has been a lifelong habit of mine to court such disasters. My awareness of that trend has never been more vivid to me than it is right now. And the breaking of a cycle has never been more possible than it is at this moment.
Awareness makes it impossible to just blindly go on thoughtlessly making the same mistakes. And it is a lot harder to do a misdeed when internal voices are screaming at us to get a clue and stop all foolishness. Taking stock of what you have stored in your cupboard makes tossing out the bad things a mandatory endeavor, and what could be worse to keep a firm hold on than respect for anyone who earned it by fear.

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The Right To Disagree

2006-04-19T14:56:00.000-07:00

TODAY'S QUOTE:
The only way to make sure people you agree with can speak is to support the rights of people you don't agree with.
Eleanor Holmes Norton, American Congresswoman

People cannot always agree, and think just how boring it would be if they always did. At first glance that may seem like a negative, but it really is not so much of a bad thing as we like to imagine. Simply parroting other peoples opinions would be little better than having no opinion of your own worth stating or defending. Be glad we are not always like-minded.
Disagreements are normal, but difficulties do often arise over the way it is done. No right minded person can really believe that shoving your beliefs down someone else's throat will change their mind. What someone gently rebels against when it is stated at a whisper, they will flat-out revolt against if bellowed.
Each of us has the right to think as we choose. We all have the right to state our beliefs, live them, and defend them. What we do not have the right to do is force feed others into sharing our unique slant on them. If we challenge someone else's right to their own opinion we compromise our own, making it an important exercise to defend the rights of all to protect the rights of all.

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A lecturer, when explaining stress management to an audience, raised a glass of water and asked, "How heavy is this glass of water?"
Answers called out ranged from 20g to 500g.
The lecturer replied, "The absolute weight doesn't matter. It depends on how long you try to hold it.
If I hold it for a minute, that's not a problem.
If I hold it for an hour, I'll have an ache in my right arm.
If I hold it for a day, you'll have to call an ambulance.
In each case, it's the same weight, but the longer I hold it, the heavier it becomes." He continued, "And that's the way it is with stress management. If we carry our burdens all the time, sooner or later, as the burden becomes increasingly heavy, we won't be able to carry on. "
"As with the glass of water, you have to put it down for a while and rest before holding it again. When we're refreshed, we can carry on with the burden. So, before you return home tonight, put the burden of work down. Don't carry it home. You can pick it up tomorrow. Whatever burdens you're carrying now, let them down for a moment if you can."
So, my friend, why not take a while to just simply RELAX. Put down anything that may be a burden to you right now. Don't pick it up again until after you've rested a while. Life is short. Enjoy it! Here are some great ways of dealing with the burdens of life:
* Accept that some days you're the pigeon, and some days you're the statue.
* Always keep your words soft and sweet, just in case you have to eat them.
* Always read stuff that will make you look good if you die in the middle of it.
* Drive carefully. It's not only cars that can be recalled by their maker.
* If you can't be kind, at least have the decency to be vague.
* If you lend someone $20 and never see that person again, it was probably worth it
* Never buy a car you can't push.
* Never put both feet in your mouth at the same time, because then you won't have a leg to stand on.
* Nobody cares if you can't dance well. Just get up and dance.
* Since it's the early worm that gets eaten by the bird, sleep late.
* The second mouse gets the cheese.
* When everything's coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.
* Birthdays are good for you. T he more you have, the longer you live.
* You may be only one person in the world, but you may also be the world to one person.
* We could learn a lot from crayons...Some are sharp, some are pretty and some are dull. Some have weird names, and all are different colors, but they all have to live in the same box.
*A truly happy person is one who can enjoy the scenery on a detour.

The Hard Path

2006-04-18T14:54:00.000-07:00

TODAY'S QUOTE:
Following the course of least resistance makes for crooked rivers and crooked men.
Lanny Henninger

The easy way often leads to places a bit dark for my taste. Most landscapes along those roads are shadowed by dishonesty. Some are lined with sad memorials of those wounded or destroyed to make the path smoother or quicker to a destination that could have been reached, by gentler means.
I have not always walked the right path, and there have been many detours along the way. Some wrong turns have been my own doing, others were taken by mistake or by believing some well-placed misinformation. Whatever the reason, directing my steps back toward where they should have been left firmly placed all along is my responsibility.
I hope in time to be rock solid in my ability to avoid being easily sidetracked. I will do my best to have a purpose behind as many footsteps as I can possibly manage. What is the sense in getting somewhere and being so defensive about the transportation used to get there that it steals the joy of your arrival.

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The Value Of Wishes That Don't Come True

2006-04-17T14:52:00.000-07:00

TODAY'S QUOTE:
It is not good for all our wishes to be filled; through sickness we recognize the value of health; through evil, the value of good; through hunger, the value of food; through exertion, the value of rest.
Greek saying

Life is a series of contrasting events, each demanding different emotions to get through, rise above, out distance, or live to the fullest. Joy is a part of life, but sorrow has its fair share of miles on this journey. We may wish that things were effortless, yet if the road was the same for the whole trip we would be bored or brain-numb within a few short miles.
It makes no sense to court the bad things, but maybe if we looked at them a bit differently their worth might become something sensible. When a negative occurs if we take some time to reflect what positive can be learned from it, instead of simply blindly reacting to the pain it inspires then it will be instantly fruitful. The pain will still be a reality, but its intensity will be muted and our ability to shoulder its weight will be strengthened by assigning it a purpose.
Things done for a reason are simply much easier to do. When no other purpose can be readily applied, using personal growth always works. We graduate from one crisis to another by means of inner strength gained on the hard paths of our past. And the peaceful times between are all the sweeter from the struggle we each make to get there.

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The Better Part

2006-04-16T14:50:00.000-07:00

TODAY'S QUOTE:
The better part of one's life consists of his friendships.
Abraham Lincoln, 1809-1865, 16th President of the United States

Real friends are treasures, giving pleasure without asking anything more complicated than to simply share your space. We often received more unconditional love from friends than from anyone else. Best friends are like extensions of self: the cream of the crop: the top of the heap, and their special touch my life has soothed me through many brutal times.
I did not have a lot of time today to work on this post, but I did not waste the time either. On this day set aside to celebrate a resurrection, I was celebrating the resurrections of self in the lives of two friends. On some days it is either, spend time here at the cost of missing a chance to soothe and comfort someone in need, or aid one or two personally at the cost of briefer posts. Today I think I chose wisely. Happy Easter All!!!

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Self Truth

2006-04-15T14:46:00.000-07:00

TODAY'S QUOTE:
If you do not tell the truth about yourself, you cannot tell it about other people.
Virginia Woolf, 1882-1941, British Novelist and Essayist

Truth can be very dry and hard to swallow if simply stated in a wooden tone, but dry facts in a tidy row are really not all that neat below the surface. Humans are complex creatures; by default their truths are layered with factual things that nobody else ever sees, unless invited inside. Some never share what is hidden, some never even find it for themselves. We all know of its existence, whatever tactics we use to find it, share it, or ignore it.
Telling the truth, at least to yourself, is vital to understanding the self you possess. Brutal truths are most unpleasant, but saying them to yourself keeps it from being such a shock when someone else brings it to your attention. And someone else surely will, trust me, someone else surely will!!
They may only possess just a fraction of the facts that exist, but that rarely stops them from making full use of them. Half-truths are used as often as anything else in the blame game, and can do as much damage as an outright untruth. If you know the whole truth it insulates you against the cold breath of judgment or the hot breath of conviction. But the form is not in the mail, so fact-finding is self-motivated, self-activated, and self-empowering.
There is a freedom to admitting the bad then changing it to something more worthy. There is a special comfort to picking yourself up and walking a few steps further out of a truth that darkness your path into a truth of a lighter shade. Some facts are only habits that have not been broken yet. There is a balance that only comes from accepting your truths, both bad and good. Seeing the root as well as the bare facts changes their meaning somewhat and makes them easier to accept and change whenever necessary.

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A Wrinkle Free Heart

2006-04-14T14:42:00.000-07:00

TODAY'S QUOTE:
To keep the heart unwrinkled, to be hopeful, kindly, cheerful, reverent--that is to triumph over old age.
Amos Bronson Alcott

We reflect externally what is happening internally; our profiles are pinched or softened in perfect measure with our attitudes and natures. The older we are the more wrinkled our canvas gets, but hopefully we are more skilled at applying colors and tones that are ageless.
Hope is essential to quality of life, no matter your situation, station, or age. We all need it to accomplish more than simple survival. Hope for a better tomorrow has gotten me through many a bad day and I 'spect it will get me through many more before their total number is spent.
Kindness is a gentle thing, expanding whomever it touches, while returning a joy beyond expression to the giver. The openness required to perform a kindness soften our sharpest edge, creating a glow that everyone can see.
A cheerful nature soothes soul deep, brightening even the darkest corner. Smiles are fountains, frowns are drains; the former makes pretty lines, while the latter digs deep wrinkles. Laughter feeds every layer and is an ageless undertaking. Nobody is ever too young or too old to deserve its special comfort, which heals as it flows.
One of the most reverent things you can do is validate your right to a happy life. Knowing yourself well enough to understand who you are and who you hope to become is an almost spiritual journey that anyone can make. If you want to really cheat old age stay young inside, childlike in nature, and true to yourself.

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Remarkable People

2006-04-13T14:40:00.000-07:00

TODAY'S QUOTE:
"People become really quite remarkable when they start thinking that they can do things. When they believe in themselves they have the first secret of success."
Norman Vincent Peale

This is so true, since the messages we give ourselves are the ones we most often listen to, even if they happen to be incorrect. Defeat is a mostly self-inflicted condition, pre-ordained inside of the brain, taken to heart then created in real time. Success can be our destination only if we see it clearly and believe in its reality.
The most wondrous things begin inside of the brain, it is just a shame that so many of them end there, as well. We are given such a powerful tool, but often it is wasted upon the clueless; it is not that the power is not present, it is that it is never plugged into.
Positive fuel makes going to a positive destination a certainty, while negative fuel gets you nowhere at the astonishing speed of thought. Deciding upon a power source is a moment-to-moment exercise we need to make, or someone else will try to make it for us, or worse yet our mind will take us on a ride we never intended. Be remarkable enough to use the power inside to reach a place of balance, it is a trip worth any effort and deserving of the best fuel possible.

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The Old Phone

When I was quite young, my father had one of the first telephones in our neighborhood. I remember the polished, old case fastened to the wall. The shiny receiver hung on the side of the box. I was too little to reach the telephone, but used to listen with fascination when my mother talked to it. Then I discovered that somewhere inside the wonderful device lived an amazing person. Her name was "Information Please" and there was nothing she did not know. Information Please could supply anyone's number and the correct time.
My personal experience with the genie-in-a-bottle came one day while my mother was visiting a neighbor. Amusing myself at the tool bench in the basement, I whacked my finger with a hammer, the pain was terrible, but there seemed no point in crying because there was no one home to give sympathy. I walked around the house sucking my throbbing finger, finally arriving at the stairway. The telephone!Quickly, I ran for the footstool in the parlor and dragged it to the landing. Climbing up, I unhooked the receiver in the parlor and held it to my ear. "Information, please" I said into the mouthpiece just above my head. A click or two and a small clear voice spoke into my ear.
"Information." "I hurt my finger..." I wailed into the phone, the tears came readily enough now that I had an audience.
"Isn't your mother home?" came the question.
"Nobody's home but me," I blubbered.
"Are you bleeding?" the voice asked.
"No," I replied. "I hit my finger with the hammer and it hurts."
"Can you open the icebox?" she asked. I said I could. "Then chip off a little bit of ice and hold it to your finger," said the voice.
After that, I called "Information Please" for everything. I asked her for help with my geography, and she told me where Philadelphia was. She helped me with my math. She told me my pet chipmunk that I had caught in the park just the day before, would eat fruit and nuts. Then, there was the time Petey, our pet canary, died. I called, Information Please," and told her the sad story. She listened, and then said things grown- ups say to soothe a child.
But I was not consoled. I asked her, "Why is it that birds should sing so beautifully and bring joy to all families, only to end up as a heap of feathers on the bottom of a cage?"
She must have sensed my deep concern, for she said quietly, "Wayne always remember that there are other worlds to sing in."
Somehow I felt better. Another day I was on the telephone, "Information Please."
"Information," said in the now familiar voice.
"How do I spell fix?" I asked.
All this took place in a small town in the Pacific Northwest. When I was nine years old, we moved across the country to Boston. I missed my friend very much. "Information Please" belonged in that old wooden box back home and I somehow never thought of trying the shiny new phone that sat on the table in the hall. As I grew into my teens, the memories of those childhood conversations never really left me. Often, in moments of doubt and perplexity I would recall the serene sense of security I had then. I appreciated now how patient, understanding, and kind she was to have spent her time on a little boy.
A few years later, on my way west to college, my plane put down in Seattle. I had about a half-hour or so between planes. I spent 15 minutes or so on the phone with my sister, who lived there now. Then without thinking what I was doing, I dialed my hometown operator and said, "Information Please."
Miraculously, I heard the small, clear voice I knew so well. "Information."
I hadn't planned this, but I heard myself saying, "Could you please tell me how to spell fix?"
There was a long pause. Then came the soft spoken answer, "I guess your finger must have healed by now."
I laughed, "So it's really you," I said. "I wonder if you have any idea how much you meant to me during that time?"
"I wonder," she said, "if you know how much your call meant to me. I never had any children and I used to look forward to your calls."
I told her how often I had thought of her over the years and I asked if I could call her again when I came back to visit my sister. "Please do", she said. "Just ask for Sally."
Three months later I was back in Seattle. A different voice answered, "Information." I asked for Sally.
"Are you a friend?" she said.
"Yes, a very old friend," I answered.
"I'm sorry to have to tell you this," she said. "Sally had been working part- time the last few years because she was sick. She died five weeks ago." Before I could hang up she said, "Wait a minute, did you say your name was Wayne?"
"Yes." I answered.
"Well, Sally left a message for you. She wrote it down in case you called. Let me read it to you." The note said, "Tell him there are other worlds to sing in. He'll know what I mean."
I thanked her and hung up. I knew what Sally meant. Never underestimate the impression you may make on others. Whose life have you touched today? Why not pass this on? I just did.... Lifting you on eagle's wings. May you find the joy and peace you long for. Life is a journey ... NOT a guided tour.

No Use Fighting Fact

2006-04-12T14:38:00.000-07:00

TODAY'S QUOTE:
There is no good in arguing with the inevitable. The only argument available with an east wind is to put on your overcoat.
James Russell Lowell, 1819-1891, American Poet/Critic/Satirist

The things that cannot be changed should not be struggled against, but some people never fully come to terms with any unhappy fact. Adjusting to whatever it is, in whatever way possible, has to be a conscious decision or it just never occurs. Acceptance puts us right in the path of altering the things that we can, which improves our quality of life... But acceptance is a voluntary response.
When I come upon an inevitable obstacle I certainly react, I just do my best not to over-react. Once it is clear that its shape cannot be altered by anything I do there is no sense in standing with my nose up against it, moving on somehow is the only way to get anywhere.
I do not simply forget that such things exist; acting as if my world was trouble free would be foolish indeed, yet I do act as if I am more than the troubles I run into. The things you give space to in your mind only grow in importance. I may notice them out of the corner of my eye or see their shadow reaching in my direction, but I also see the rest of the landscape and the sunbeams lighting the path are much more breathtaking in contrast, so I concentrate upon them. I just refuse to be led by dread!

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None So Old

2006-04-10T14:33:00.000-07:00

TODAY'S QUOTE:
None are so old as those who have outlived enthusiasm.
Henry David Thoreau, 1817-1862, American Essayist/Poet/Naturalist

The zest for life is essential to its quality. Quantity is an uncertainty, yet growing old is optional in so many more ways than we often realize. Aging is mandatory, but only our body must go from dust-to-dust while our spirits are everlasting. Souls full of expression have no measure of time, no clock to punch, or any calendar that applies to their longevity.
I have seen hundred year old eyes light up with a child's delight and as if by magic the years tumbled from their face. I have seen sweet ageless smiles and heard timeless laughter from elderly people that made us peers in every way when I returned whatever they offered. Meeting another soul is not the same as appearances might imply, enthusiasm on both parts makes numbers instantly irrelevant to the formula.
Enthusiasm means passion and there is no purer passion than the eagerness to really live. In one way we are held hostage by the body we inhabit, yet our body is not large enough to really hold a timeless soul. All parts of you are housed there; the child, the teen, and the adult in all its many forms and fashions interact, overlap, and intertwine if we validate their existence with attention.
Arnold Glasow called enthusiasm, "The energy that boils over and runs down the pot."
Norman Vincent Peale called it, "Fire under control."
Either way it takes a flame and fuel which each of us has to supply. Keep the fire burning...no matter what your age...and be truly ageless.

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The Power Of Touch

2006-04-09T14:31:00.000-07:00

TODAY'S QUOTE:
Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around.
Leo Buscaglia

Touch is intensely powerful; our energy touches others for ill or good, altering the vibrations of those around us. All of us are fed or starved by good touch or bad, and what we pass to others is often simply the echoes of what was just given to us. We should consider the importance of choosing for ourselves, instead of simply paying it forward whatever its content.
Lifting someone up above where you are then pulling yourself up to their level makes more sense than dragging them down to share a common misery. Any smile shared makes the joy all the richer and can be given by a tone of voice or words on paper. I hand out extras to people who do not seem to have one handy, finding that a lot better than stealing one that will not fit my face anyway. Without intention, I might not ease a frown or I may even cause one, but I attempt to make as many conscious decisions about my mood as necessary to keep it in some sort of balance.
We cannot control how other people use their power of touch, but we can determine how we allow it to affect us. We can have control of how we touch and what we leave behind or leave it to chance and willingly give as good as we get even if the ones we are giving it to do not deserve its burden. Sharing of emotions should be selective, not just hosed upon everyone; few will thank you for covering them in shit and some will even get truly hostile.
Touch gently the ones you touch and forgive the ones who do not return the favor. Do not change your nature to mirror the unnatural, even for a moment. Think about the echoes you want to leave behind and in that way make your personal space more peaceful. Success is not always certain, but it is always possible. Once you begin thinking about touch in a deeper way, it gets used as a tool more often than a weapon and its true potential is more fully realized.

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Think Big

2006-04-08T14:25:00.000-07:00

TODAY'S QUOTE:
As long as you're going to be thinking anyway, THINK BIG.
Donald Trump

A healthy brain has no weight or height restrictions about what size of thoughts it can contain. Minds stretch if we exercise them, but left to their own devices they rarely do anything more taxing than run in tight circles. The law of supply and demand is well enforced there; ask little and get next to nothing, require more and the skies the only limit in sight.
Some notions areembraceablee, some too lame to deserve the effort. We think without thinking, too often drifting from place to place as the wind of drama or gossip pushes us this way or that. I guess in most cases it can be said that we waste more than we use. This quote reminds us that we not only can, but should direct our thoughts toward larger mental visions.
There is nothing quite like suspending any barriers you haveerectedd and letting your mind have flight. The training is not an overnightendeavorr, but an ongoing occupation. We owe it to ourselves to get the most out of life, so having the best of thoughts should be one of our first and foremost goals to try for every day.
A few days ago I stumbled upon a meditation site and I have been using it daily. The feeling of peace and clarity it leaves me with is worth the mention. I shared it with a few friends who have had similar results, so I am posting it here for thebenefitt of any who would like to try its soothing space. http://www.meditainment.com/ click on visit the secret garden and enjoy.

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Find Time

2006-04-07T14:22:00.000-07:00

TODAY'S QUOTE:
People who cannot find time for recreation are obliged sooner or later to find time for illness.
John Wanamaker, 1838-1922, American Merchant

The body rebels if the mind, heart, and soul are not tended correctly. Stress builds up mountain-tall then finding no release starts ripping whatever tissue it can find and its reach is unlimited. If you swallow glass it wounds and if you wallow in stress it disables; stress is attached to most everything, but to bind it to yourself seems slow suicide.
Stress management is rubbish hauling before it gets to mammoth proportions. A big portion of our success or failure in keeping the pile to a reasonable level is balance or the lack thereof. Without some outside interest beyond the stressful situations we find ourselves in there is no balance and what we do not release affects everything.
I usually have several different projects going at once, overlapping each other and within easy reach, always things I want to learn more about or have a passionate desire to master. I do not just sit and watch television or listen to music, although they are in the background; I fill every moment I can with more than just the option of letting life get to me. Idle hands and a run away mind often make more trouble in an already troublesome situation. Giving only what each problem demands is good for heart, mind, and soul. And with the balance gained it is much easier to maintain a healthy body.

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THE SISTERHOOD

Heart Visions

2006-04-06T11:22:00.000-07:00

TODAY'S QUOTE:
Your vision will become clear only when you look into your heart... Who looks outside, dreams. Who looks inside, awakens.
Carl Jung

This is so true; awakenings are internal lightning strikes, some smaller than others...but all of major proportion to a persons quality of life. People who sleep walk are unaware of their sad state. Any awakening is from a zombie like state, so should be considered a most joyous occasion no matter what comes next, and come it surely will. In the case of lightning strikes, usually they foretell an approaching storm.
I experienced my first awakening just hours before a stormy period of exploration began, in a marriage that had been little more than a dictatorship up until that point. I went through countless changes upon impact then more followed at a steady pace and are still occurring to this day so many years later.
The feeling of electricity remains, I very rarely forget how alive I am. Other wake up calls have been answered, some most unpleasant in nature and sensation, but I always rejoice in the fact that I am awake at all. My heart has been broken, yet my belief in myself remains untarnished. I am no better or worse than most people, but I am more aware of my moving internal parts than most people I meet.
I recommend turning inward and watching for lightning strikes. I shudder to think of what shape I would be in now without the first bolt-upright moment of awareness I experienced in 1993. I still have miles to go on the road it set me upon, but I welcome every step. Some days I feel every breath I take; however you look at it that is priceless, no matter the cost to earn the pleasure.

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THE SISTERHOOD

A Good Part Behind

2006-04-05T10:11:00.000-07:00

TODAY'S QUOTE:
He who is outside the door has already got a good part of his journey behind him.
Dutch Proverb

Finding a door, or building one is a journey all in itself. Struggling toward a place of reckoning is half the war, but being the first battle gives it the point position. The time spent wrestling yourself door-side is a true test of what kind of commitment you will give to reach and embrace whatever changes wait beyond its barrier.
Without alterations life just stays the same, or maybe a better way of saying it is that without growth there is no need to alter anything. The battles with yourself are some of the hardest you will ever fight, but they are of such a noble origin that it is an honor to face the test and empowering to achieve victory.
It is much easier to just go on with a negative than it is to change it into a positive. Simply said, growth takes guts. The battlefield is internal, opponents two sides of the same being; one side aches to explore, the other set in its ways and stubborn toward change. Others can support your efforts, but the battle is really yours alone to win or lose. The credit or blame rests at your feet, making it all the more vital that you succeed.
When you stand poised to cross the threshold, the strength gained to get that far will enable the next step taken. Lifting your foot is not an easy undertaking, but it is much easier than what was suffered to get to the stepping over place. Few people who reach this far ever fail to travel on. The worst is over and true victory a doorway away.

THINK ABOUT IT

LET IT GROW

THEN DECIDE

Dream Gripping

2006-04-04T07:35:00.000-07:00

TODAY'S QUOTE:
When you have a dream you've got to grab it and never let go.
Carol Burnett

This is certainly true if you ever expect it to succeed. Nothing happens with a dream kept safely deep inside of a mind that never believes in its possibilities. A glimmer of hope will strengthen into soul-deep certainty with some tender care. Every dream begins as a glimmer before it becomes the blaze that forges a purpose strong enough to give your very being over to its health.
I have a dream. I have a certainty. I have a purpose. But without faith it is just a collection of thoughts, and without action it is just mind trash, pretty but useless to anyone. Lately I have learned many hard lessons about dreaming things into reality. There is a responsibility that comes with any soul-deep dream; it is a sacred trust if the things touching others have your name and image attached.
Dream big, reach high, but never allow others access if your soul is in turmoil about them in any way. A dream taken too high, before the one in whose heart it resides is ready to control it with confidence, is bound to failure. The site gifted to me over a year ago was instantly abandoned by the man who built it, even though he was well aware he left me with hands tied. His dream was to build a website and he did a wonderful job. My vision and his skill shaped every page and it is a delight to see.
Every day since his abandonment, I have struggled to keep it going and find someone to take his place.
I thought that had been accomplished finally, but the truth is I am much worse off than before help arrived. Abandoning my dream is impossible, so I have to abandon the main site that I have no skill to add to or take anything away from. But...in no way am I abandoning my dream. I have another site http://www.sisterhoodsupport.com and I am perfectly capable of handling it on my own. It will not be as fancy, but it will be: my hands...my dreams... my hopes...my vision, but not for me only; it all revolves around you.
This journal is the core of it all and anywhere it rests secure, I will be satisfied. My dream to lend a hand is not something I can simply set down and walk away from. It was born of agony...my own and my families, my friends and their families. It was brought to life from deaths...my husband, my nephew, 2 of his children, and my son's best friend. It was given breath by murder and suicide...and a sacred promise made at a grave side.
A dream with such a visible road to this place is much too deeply rooted to ever leave in the dust. And dragging it through the mud is too awful to contemplate. So I did not down-size my dream, but I am downsizing its focus, until my skill reaches a point of expansion, or the hands willing to help do not set alarms ringing inside of me.
Bookmark this page and you will be at the heart of whatever space I inhabit. Click on the title and visit the place it is housed. Journey's End is as much a state of mind as it is a location on the web.

The Great Mystery

2006-04-03T15:18:00.000-07:00

TODAY'S QUOTE:
People like you and I, though mortal of course like everyone else, do not grow old no matter how long we live...We never cease to stand like curious children before the great mystery into which we were born.
Albert Einstein

Life is magical. All the world is a stage, yet many never take time to wonder about whatever role they have been cast into. I used to simply read the parts handed me, without complaint. It was much easier to conform, but the casting couch only earned me a supporting role with all the responsibility and none of the fame. Then I started to question something quite basic.
Why in the hell was someone so incapable of directing their own actions in charge of mine? Suddenly realizing that I had no real life made everything that came before seem mostly lame, compared to what could have been accomplished if I had been more than wooden. I had allowed so much simply because I did not realize I had a choice.
We all have choices, sometimes we make the right ones and sometimes not. Wisdom usually comes in spurts, often following a tragedy. But to find a life after a lifetime of role playing gives a childlike view of the delights of the world at large. The vastness of the earth we live on, and all the things we miss seeing even if we travel non-stop for a lifetime is beyond imagining. There is knowledge that never gets absorbed no matter how long we put our noses into books.
The choices of destinations and knowledge are unlimited, yet we all too often seem satisfied to stay permanently rooted to one spot in both body and mind. The children in us grows old and careworn, living lives programmed by others. When we cease to wonder life loses some of its wonder. Magical moments become mundane without attention to detail.
Put your nose to windowpane once in awhile and notice your choices. Choose some for the adult inside, but do not forget the child who asks so many questions. Through their eyes you will see the glory of life and embrace its wonder.

THINK ABOUT IT

LET IT GROW

THEN DECIDE

Affording To Be Stupid

2006-04-02T15:16:00.000-07:00

TODAY'S QUOTE:
It is one of the blessings of old friends that you can afford to be stupid with them.
Ralph Waldo Emerson (1803-1882)

Well, I was three paragraphs into today's post when a awful noise caught my attention. I noticed the change outside the window, the landscape suddenly bathed in a strange hue only produced by storms. The wind was rumbling like the wheels of a fast moving train and for the moment I was trapped inside the far end of a mobile home while the air was becoming a visible enemy.
Tree limbs bounced up and down in a mad dance, some appearing to grow in length as trees responded to the mighty push of air against wood. I did a dance of my own and sang out words of warning to the teen in the shower. By the time he was dressed enough to allow me into his space and beyond, hail was banging an angry tune upon tin. Lighting split the sky with fierce intensity and the long and short of it is, I ran back and without a second thought unplugged all electronics.
Now I sit here and frown softly because words I can never hope to get back are gone for good, but my eyes are sparkling too. How can I mourn lost words when I still have a roof above me and floor below. The things lost and gone are most times better put to rest so that things found and solid can be appreciated.
Today the quote will speak for itself it seems, and I will talk of other things. Trying to recapture what is gone is not how I choose to live my life or spend my time. The storm is over now, but sure to come again sometime soon. In life, situations ripe for storms are plentiful. Things lost are soon replaced with other things.
I have lived through enough storms to realize that I have the power to weather most anything if I choose to salvage all that remains and get over the loses I cannot control. Mistakes in judgment and such, (unplugging the computer without saving what I had written, or countless examples I could but will not mention), are part of being human. Learning from mistakes makes them worth the agony, avoiding the same ones later is a sure sign that what was paid is all that will be required.
We can avoid some storms, while others are upon us out of nowhere. We can concentrate on what blows away or gather together whatever remains. We can do most anything we set our minds to do, but we have to choose wisely. What you give attention to gains its own energy, fueling a positive strengthens us and giving power to a negative drains us. Duh!!! Seems a no-brainer when you think about it, sooooo...

THINK ABOUT IT

LET IT GROW

THEN DECIDE

Poor Substitutes

2006-04-01T15:10:00.000-08:00

TODAY'S QUOTE:
"Outside show is a poor substitute for inner worth."
Aesop

Most people want to be seen in the best possible light, but if there is nothing behind the image it is just a mask that any stiff breeze can toss aside. Some false faces are painted vivid and bright, yet fade quickly without any inner illumination. Sometimes outer beauty only becomes evident after meeting the spirit housed inside. A fair appearance can turn ugly with one puff of wind, and a homely one can be made gorgeous by a flattering illumination. If I had to choose between outer beauty and inner goodness I would much rather be ugly as sin on the outside than blackened by it soul deep.
The clothes do not make the man, although our eyes may be drawn to a fashionable appearance. The costume of a man does not insure manhood. Charm can be parroted, but grace is beyond a birds understanding. In life the actions you perform during quiet moments are more telling than anything done while on display.
When highlighting the advantages we possess it is much more illuminating to adjust the glow from within than to line the stage with floodlights. And it has been my observation that a shifty soul looks out through darting eyes that never gaze deeply into any mirror. They may contemplate one feature at a time or evaluate the total picture, but avoid direct eye contact with themselves. People who cannot look with honesty upon their own reflection need not try to evaluate anyone else's, but they are often the first to criticize.
Look more deeply and gently upon others, overlooking the obvious. Place more importance with what is visible behind eyes than fashion of dress. A king dressed in rags is still regal, but no matter how richly dressed a jester is he remains foolish in actions and intent. Real class comes from inside. And real beauty is so much more then just skin deep.

THINK ABOUT IT

LET IT GROW

THEN DECIDE

Deliberate Actions

2006-03-31T21:20:00.000-08:00

TODAY'S QUOTE:
Take time to deliberate; but when the time for action arrives, stop thinking and go in.
Andrew Jackson, 1767-1845, 7th President of the United States

Looking before you leap is a sane sort of jumping, but hesitating for too long in a leaping stance can put you off-balance enough to inspire a hard fall. Changing back and forth between stop and go is even worse, since every beginning and ending is packed full of intense emotions. I cannot like feeling either extreme, so it is all the more distasteful if my own actions are the cause of the upset.
Getting the dial set to the right amount of thinking time is tricky. Meatier issues take longer to digest than fluffy ones. Considering a heavy one for too long can scare a person half to death, or all the way to the asylum. Dwelling upon a light one at length can cause brain cells to shrink, attention spans to shorten, and childlike behavior to develop.
Setting the speed at which you think figures into this formula too. Racing from notion-to-notion gives little insight, half asked questions have no real answers. Loping slowly seems about as ridiculous as speaking slowly in a loud fashion to a blind person. Too fast and you out-distance the answer, too slowly and you never get to it. An ideal medium can be found and maintained with practice and will power.
Strength of will is the portion of self with the most control over what kind of thoughts we have and how we deal with them. A strong mind is necessary to obtain a healthy balance; wrestling a thought out of mind, or killing it altogether takes muscle. After a surprisingly short time the number of bothersome notions will be close to nothing and the ones you do have will be weak as well as lame.
Pondering better thoughts more efficiently will help in thinking before leaping situations. When a target is in mind it is much safer to jump. And going in is more likely to be a successful endeavor with productive planning, even if it is brief than it would be with mindless panic inspired by over-thinking.

THINK ABOUT IT

LET IT GROW

THEN DECIDE