Wednesday, May 31, 2006

Joyous Task

TODAY'S QUOTE:
Set me a task in which I can put something of my very self, and it is a task no longer; it is joy; it is art.
Bliss Carman (1861-1929) Poet

This is my joyous task and always has been. I began it for my sake, but continue it for others. I think as I write here, so I could gain just as much for myself by being silent. I know the power of words to wound or soothe and I aim mine at the wounded to soothe wherever possible.
My life is made richer by the time I spend here, although not in money. In reality my toil here has cost me dearly in that realm. The riches comes in friendships forged and comfort given that is returned to me in ways that make my soul rejoice.
Do I consider it an art? Well, yes in its own way I suppose it is. Each soul has something of beauty to share with the world, and this is my slice of soul laid bare for public consumption.

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Tuesday, May 30, 2006

Sensible Options

TODAY'S QUOTE:
Pain is inevitable. Suffering is optional.
M. Kathleen Casey

Life is overflowing with things to agonize over, but the amount of time you spend banging your head against an immovable object is your choice. Shit happens, people change, players use and abuse, parents fail, children screw up, friends prove false, the list of reasons to be melancholy is seemingly endless. Giving into the negative emotions that any heartache inspires is all too easily accomplished by just drifting wherever they push you.
Too near the edge is not a safe place to abandon yourself to the push of doom. Free-falling into disaster is no way to live, but some of us do it all the time. Things with the power to wound keep on doing so as long as we give them free rein. Learning then moving on puts the power where it belongs. Old hurts will only stay fresh if we constantly pick at them with our thoughts.
It may be harder in the short term to wrestle the negative into silence, but it saves the long term for really living. Do not make the frog prince a king by renting him space in your mind. Do not let a less than perfect childhood keep doing damage your whole life long. Do not let a liar make you blind to truth, or a false love make you doubt a true one exists.
You cannot live a pain free life, but your suffering is mind made after a certain point. What sense is it to let yourself bleed forever for something that someone else did to you, when soon they hardly remember your name. I forgive myself for being human enough to be easily wounded, then I forgive the one who hurt me. I do not forget the pain or its source, but I refuse to let anyone make me bitter or jaded toward life. With some forethought and a bit of luck one pain will help me avoid another. Hurt whenever you must, but suffer as little as possible.

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Friday, May 26, 2006

Sometimes Sources

TODAY'S QUOTE:
Sometimes your joy is the source of your smile, but sometimes your smile can be the source of your joy.
Thich Nhat Hanh


What came first the chicken or the egg? In the long and short of it, it does not matter the order of conception. When you are smacking your lips over an omelet the last thing that comes to mind is the source of the egg. Ewwww! When a smile graces your face or gets passed to someone else's, the order in which it appeared is not a consideration either; it just feels too damn good to ponder it in that fashion.
I know for true that if you perform an act it will bring it to fact level in the blink of an eye. I often smile when I would rather frown, because giving into the negative would make a mess of my equilibrium in no time flat. Negatives use up too much precious space, but positives expand as they go. Smiling when you would rather frown just confuses the hell out of any lurking scowl. All too soon the grin will be soul deep and not simply pasted on.
The first person who smiles back will give you a real reason to be doing so. It seems simple because it is; frankly speaking, most things in life are less complicated then we like to think. All too often people imagine tasks more difficult so they have a valid excuse not to attempt them. There is simply no excuse good enough for not smiling as often as possible.

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Thursday, May 25, 2006

Just Be Happy

TODAY'S QUOTE:
Now and then it's good to pause in our pursuit of happiness and just be happy.
Guillaume Apollinaire, 1880-1918, French Poet and Writer

The search for happiness is often so frantic that we rush by the very things that would guarantee its place in our lives. We imagine it has to do with riches, or possessions, but none of that brings any lasting satisfaction. Money is man made and so are the things it can buy. Happiness has no price.
It is a state of mind, not something you can find in a store, or deposit in a bank account. You cannot order it from a catalog. It cannot be stolen from someone else and worn by you, trying that will cost more dearly than the imagination can conceive. Happiness cannot be trapped or snuck up on. The fastest does not win it like a trophy and the slowest does not lose it by default.
The situations of your life and the people who inhabit it cannot take it from you for long, unless you allow it, or give it to you in any lasting fashion. Moments of joy are not the same as real happiness, which comes from inside and radiates outward. The simplest things teach us the most important lessons about real happiness. The best way to achieve it is to give it away moment by precious moment.
The spring is an internal one, fed by the soul in a never ending flow. Once discovered it never dries up, although it does slow down during times of worry and stress. Look inside, it is there just waiting for you to tap its resources. It will not come find you, but if you want it badly enough it will certainly meet you half way.

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Wednesday, May 24, 2006

If You Want Happiness

TODAY'S QUOTE:
If you want happiness for an hour... take a nap. If you want happiness for a day... go fishing. If you want happiness for a month... get married. If you want happiness for a year... inherit a fortune. If you want happiness for a lifetime... help others.
Chinese proverb

The happiness of an hour is not the same sort as lifetime happiness. Nobody is happy all the time, no matter who they are. Some of us are mostly always happy no matter the circumstances. Some are happy from time-to-time if they have reason to be. Some are never happy no matter how good their fortune. Happiness is different for each of us and the lack of it is on our shoulders too.
I try to find reason to be happy, even if I have to search for it. I always discover something to be joyful about. Reasons to be unhappy are often so bright that they make it hard to see beyond them, but I learned long ago that focusing there only shuts out any opportunity to feel bliss. Nothing makes me happier than reaching in my pocket, grabbing an extra smile, dusting it off, and handing it to someone who does not have one of their own.
We have such power to improve the outlook of everyone we touch, and when you lift someone else up you rise too. See someone frowning, give them a smile. See someone struggling, give them a hand. Notice someone too near the edge, guide them to a safer spot. Come upon the unaware, toss them a hint of what it is to soar no matter where you are. Let the chances you have to make the world a gentler place be the locations where you seek your own happiness and you will never be disappointed.

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Tuesday, May 23, 2006

Attempted Courage

TODAY'S QUOTE:
What would life be if we had no courage to attempt anything?
Vincent Van Gogh

The answer to that is a no-brainer, if nothing is ever attempted then nothing is ever gained. Losses would be final. By the time adulthood was reached we would all be hopelessly entombed in lives little better than walking death. Progress on the planet and inside ourselves would be unheard of, and pointless would be the best that could be said about living.
Life is not like that; sure bad comes and with it all sorts of headaches and heartaches, but with a bit of luck and some valor anything can be overcome. Not easily... certainly some things take back-breaking effort. Not quickly... a lot of time went into getting yourself into any kind of corner. Not blindly... without looking where you are headed it is a sure bet that you will end up more caught in a trap from each step taken.
Courage does not mean the absence of fear. You can be trembling like a leaf in the breeze and still be courageous. It takes a ton of it to act in spite of the fear you feel. Each terror I have ever faced in my whole life has been less frightening face-to-face than what my imagination warned me it would be. The ones I ran from only chased me. The ones I ignored attacked me while I slumbered. The ones I stood toe-to-toe with always shrunk in equal measure to my rising up.
Bravery is not as hard as it seems when you realize that what you fear is unequal to the human spirit. Whatever happens it is always better to attempt courage and try to get past the bogeyman. He will not just vanish because you wish him away, but he will cut and run most times when you call his bluff.

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Monday, May 22, 2006

Begin Again

TODAY'S QUOTE:
It is possible to begin again. It is hard, and we never do it perfectly, but it can be done.
Andrew Greeley

If rebirth was not a possibility this world would be such a dreary place. A landscape where the soil could not support new growth would stay the same in such a negative fashion, with only the damage from nature or man being the only alterations possible. Starting over is always just a decision away. Simply put, if you want it badly enough rebirth is inevitable.
No...it is not an easy task, nothing worth having ever is effortless. If you want ease kick back in a recliner and do nothing, life will gladly pass you on by without a second glance. Time marches on no matter how we wish it only crawled. We do not have to be actively involved for the clock to tick, but it is always advisable to at least periodically make note of its passing.
Oblivion is man made. We create it for comfort. We build it for safety. We construct it of strong stuff to keep the bad weather out, but in the process we block out the sunbeams. Without illumination our core can not support new growth, all its energy is needed for keeping the walls repaired. In the dark bitterly cold interior of a mans soul there is no joy without the hope of replanting a fallow field and watching it grow.
New shoots need rain, they can not hope to live otherwise, but sunlight is also a requirement to their survival. A healthy plant must get a good measure of both so its roots can sink deeply enough to stand a chance when the breeze becomes a mighty gale. The withstanding of gales thickens the stalk so it can support the fruit it is meant to produce. All things have a reason and a season. The season of rebirth is different for every man, and the yield is up to whatever is invested in the plot we each plant.


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Sunday, May 21, 2006

Optional War

TODAY'S QUOTE:
"Conflict is inevitable, but combat is optional."
Max Lucado

The chances for battle are constant; if no easy reason lays about, some people have no trouble creating one out of nothing. I know many who love drama and strife so much that they rush from here to there, burning bridges and burying land mines. I do not happen to be one of them. I resent any time they spend in my precious space, because of the debris they leave scattered all about. I have found it much easier to avoid contact to a level high enough to make them realize that the path to my heart is not down trouble street.
If fighting solved anything I would not struggle against putting up my dukes, but when the dust settles the emotions that created the strife are only intensified by the battle. Two wounded people are much less likely to have a meeting of the minds. An honest debate is one thing, bitch-slapping is quite another. The choice is always ours to make and the risk ours to take, but something that costs so much should give something in return.
All the major battles I fight are within myself. I struggle daily to fill my life with some new knowledge of self, adding at least a small measure to the facts I gather on my journey. I try not to beat myself up too much for the missteps I sometimes take. I force my heart to forgive, so there is room for love. I smother negative thoughts, so positive ones have plenty of room for growth. I battle my own fears and limitations. I do not have time to fight you, I am much to busy wrestling alone.
We are only here such a very short time. Spend your time wisely, or it will flow past you like quicksilver and leave you wondering where it all went while you were so busy wasting your every moment on incidentals. If it is so very vital to you to be in a war zone, fight it inside first. You may tire of the pursuit long before you ever turn your attention elsewhere.

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Saturday, May 20, 2006

Humility

TODAY'S QUOTE:
Humility does not mean you think less of yourself. It means you think of yourself less.
Ken Blanchard

The lack of false pride is a valuable trait, humility encourages us to consider the happiness of others, as well as our own. The truly prideful only understand the grasping of treasures, but know nothing of the letting go. They never understand that when we give we gain a lasting pleasure.
Self-awareness is not a license to be selfish. Knowing what makes you happy is important in the larger picture, because you will never make anyone else smile if you do not know how to do it yourself. Humbleness does not mean you are not important. The humblest cottage can have more comfort than the grandest castle if it is filled with warmth.
It is the inner workings of a clock that make it keep perfect time. We are the same, if something inside is bent and twisted then we are constantly running too fast or too slow. Fast tickers zoom past everything without gaining anything much from the journey, franticly trying to outdistance whatever they are fleeing from. Slow tickers barely function, pushing themselves from one feeble tick to the next while life whizzes on by. Neither condition is mandatory, changing the tempo of your ticking is possible if it is what you really want.
Finding the courage or the energy is not easy, but it is the most worthwhile endeavor you can ever give to yourself and in a real way to the world at large. Tossing out the trash is the first chore in the list of requirements to finding your perfect rhythm. How can a body function or a mind find peace when it is overburdened with debris that only clutters up valuable space. The job may seem overwhelming, but once begun you feel lighter spirited with each mighty toss of the shit you only own because someone else weighed you down with their issues.
Life is what you make of it, so do not simply be what life makes of you. Nothing valuable is easily won, but any internal improvement is worth whatever aches have to be suffered to gain them. Feel neither pride nor shame so totally that they steal the gift of each new day. Feel neither joy nor sorrow so completely that you become blind to what is really important. Balance the good against the bad, tune up what is not running smoothly and true peace of mind is more than possible, it is truly inevitable.

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Friday, May 19, 2006

A Messy Theory

TODAY'S QUOTE:
My theory on housework is, if the item doesn't multiply, smell, catch on fire or block the refrigerator door, let it be. No one cares. Why should you?
Erma Bombeck (1927-1996)

This is not my attitude, in total, although I do subscribe to a large portion of its message. I am not a neat freak, but I do not bend all the way in the opposite direction either. I just usually do whatever I must to be able to do as I choose.
I try to use my time in a productive manner, doing something I feel driven to do, so there are not too many useless moments stacked together. I do not enjoy looking back upon a day that has no forward motion. Hell, I would rather clean than do nothing at all, but there are so many other things to choose from that take less energy and produce more lasting pleasure.
One of my best friends cleans all the time, with a house full of kids by the time she gets the last room straightened the first one she did is ready to redo. She is a trooper, beginning again in a never ending cycle. She has my respect for her fortitude. I 'spect I would stand like a tyrant over the messy ones, making them put everything back to rights until they learned the hard lesson of cause and effect.
We are a race of extremists, but I am on the fence on this issue. I have messy friends and neat ones, and I can tell you true that I do not love them for the way they clean or if they even do at all. The only ones that will truly judge you by such a shallow measure are not worth the knowing in any case.
I have messy moments and neat ones and I do not like myself more in either role. I truly just do not stress over the little issues of life that mean next to nothing in the long run. If I am remembered when I am gone it will not be because my house gleamed, but that worries me not at all. I get no comfort now from the notion of being recalled with a dust rag or mop in hand when I have left this earthly realm. The chance of that happening is nil, but let my words echo on and I will have served a higher purpose than keeping my corners dust bunny free.

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Thursday, May 18, 2006

Flight Training

TODAY'S QUOTE:
We learn to fly not by becoming fearless, but by the daily practice of courage
Sam Keen

Fear is a natural state; each of us fear at a different level and we also fear different things. The overcoming of fright, fearing but acting in spite of terror, inspires an altered state where all real and spiritual knowledge is not only possible, but also quite inevitable. Being totally frightless is a human impossibility, yet learning how to control the power given to it is essential to a full life.
I have noticed that the hardest fears to overcome are the ones others place inside of you. When you doubt yourself and someone seconds that emotion somehow, a negative is reinforced times two. The more you hear and see it, the more you buy into the bullshit. It is a good thing that I believe any fear can be overcome or I would be a mouse still with a shadow life.
I fear, but I mostly ignore its pull. I fear not really living enough to control the hold it has on me. I refuse to tie myself in knots over what MIGHT happen, knowing that if I begin that process NOTHING will ever be different than it was yesterday. I do not fear the past, its hold ends with each new dawning day. I do not fear the present, it is my reality whatever it may be. I do not fear the future, it would gladly steal my today.
I am careful what I give my energy to. Name something and you give it life. You create or tear down with the words used and the names uttered. I take care not to name what I have not learned how to control within my own space, doing so would only invite defeat. I do not fear defeat, but I certainly will not willingly invite it to occur.
I fly, soaring above the point where fear longs to keep me trapped. I sometimes land hard, but even when I do, I come away from it stronger somehow. Chicken Little has no right to my life, so fear is a domain where I will never live. If I crash land, so what, at least I can say I had the nerve to really soar.

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Wednesday, May 17, 2006

True Math

TODAY'S QUOTE:
Everything you add to the truth subtracts from the truth.
Alexander Solzhenitsyn, Russian Novelist and Nobel Prize Winner

The truth altered or edited is not the truth at all. Hunks of facts spliced together with lame excuses and qualifiers are useless information and can be very damaging to those of us who arrange things according to what they believe to be the truth. Half truths hinder both the teller and the one who swallows it hook, line, and sinker.
Some people tell you what they wish was true, but even good intentions do not excuse the use of an untruth when reality is all that is needed. I never made anyone pay a price for telling me the truth, even if it was a truth I did not like. Better in life to face what is, bravely than swallow any old lie and build a life around it. I cannot understand the mentality that steals a persons life by making them live a lie.
I do not deal in fabrications. I have swallowed poison that I thought was wine, but I only acted upon what someone I trusted told me. Eventually all lies are revealed and eventually all liars will have to answer for their misdeeds. I do not judge them myself, but give it to God to sort out, I figure that way just punishment will be given without my having to waste time and energy on vengeance, since most times a lot of those things have already been spent upon a lost cause.
Stretching the truth produces a lie, white lies are still falsehoods and once trust is broken it takes a huge amount of time and effort to regain lost ground. Resisting the urge to add spice to the truth or placating someone who is only seeking the truth may be difficult at times. The alternative of having to suffer guilt or shame over pain caused by words we say is so much harder in the long run. Really thinking before speaking is the always the best defense.

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Tuesday, May 16, 2006

History

TODAY'S QUOTE:
History, despite its wrenching pain, cannot be unlived, but if faced with courage, need not be lived again.
Maya Angelou, American Poet and Writer

This quote gives me hope. Hopefulness is a state of grace that God endows all humans with at birth, but some of us lose the ability from being blindsided by heartache too often. I guess I am stubborn or too idealistic to buy into the idea that I deserve to just live a life of constant reliving of past blunders. I hope I can always learn enough from my mistakes to not make some of them over and over endlessly.
I hope. I seem to have a well of hope inside of me that never goes dry. If I face the past boldly then I will not be required to sing it over and over like a skipping record. What was does not have to be what is, unless we are determined to keep it. Some hug their heartache then bellow ouch endlessly. I say, "SHIT THAT HURT" then try to avoid stumbling over that same thing again.
I do not always succeed, which tells me that I have more to learn about what makes me tick. I take another long hard look if it is a mistake I have made before. I have so much to learn, it seems a bloody waste to keep learning the same thing over and endlessly over. Some lessons are just hard won. You cannot unlive your mistakes or undo misdeeds just by examining them, but you can learn what your weakest point is by looking over the past and taking notice of where you trip most often.
History is a body of knowledge of past events, better to learn from than repeat as if we are caught in a time warp. Tomorrow is another day, why live it as you did during an unhappy yesterday?? It is easier to avoid a pitfall than it is to climb out of it, but until you admit your own responsibility in digging the hole it is impossible to fill it. Learn then move on.

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Monday, May 15, 2006

Direction Of Movement

TODAY'S QUOTE:
The greatest thing in this world is not so much where we stand as in what direction we are moving.
Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

The direction of movement is the most important thing; one step forward can change where we stand for good or ill. Some of us never see past the spot where we rest, some are so satisfied there or frightened of change that they never move much at all, others never hold still. Some know where they are headed, while others never have a clue. Some stand frozen, some spin in place, some follow whoever is just ahead, and some lead the way.
Having no direction means being satisfied with heading wherever the breeze blows, and it gets mighty windy sometimes. If you would not run out and invite a tornado to lift you up and deposit you where it chooses why allow life to toss you about. Blow into your own sails and see how far you can go in the direction of your choosing.
The path we travel is not always the one we dream of being on when we are children playing at being grown up. When I married I believed that happily ever after came next. Oh boy, what a rude awakening that was, and I simply continued being rudely awakened for twenty years. What a clueless moron I seemed, although deep inside I knew better, I just kept with a program that almost destroyed me and certainly damaged a couple of my children in ways I could have avoided. Looking back is painful from the vantage point I am at now, but at the time I was doing the best I could with the mind set I had. Fools mean well and I will admit that I was certainly a fool. The sad part is that being foolish reappears from time to time.
I do not wear a sign that says in bold letters "I BELIEVE LIARS" yet some pretty good ones have outwitted me in my lifetime. The fact that not all that long ago I placed my future in the hands of another one tells me that I am far from being immune to the poison they can inject. The last lesson was so brutal that I will never forget its sting. He derailed my train, but in the end he will pay a much larger price than I did. I forgave him for my own sake though I doubt he will ever forgive himself. A person has to make right the things they do to earn their own forgiveness, and I figure the odds on that are astronomical.
The moment I gave the tornado the point position I was holding on to a string and powerless to control my direction. Never again will I place my dreams in anyone else's hands to manipulate. Getting back on track took some doing and the path behind me has debris scattered everywhere, but this train is speeding away from the wreckage fueled by determination to stay on the right path or die trying.
My direction is the overcoming of obstacles and the living as fully as possible this life I have. I may seem naive at times, but it is my nature to believe the best of everyone till I am proven wrong, which I often am. Why do I persist in keeping the faith when all around me is solid proof that to do so will land me face down in some pile of dirt or another? I would rather believe in the good I see in people, even if I have to squint to see it than give my heart over to the bitterness that comes of pessimism. The only way to outdistance our mistakes is to travel on. Listen closely and you will hear my whistle blowing in the distance as I speed on by. Happiness is not a destination, but a state of mind. This train is traveling constantly forward toward every sunrise, keeping the past forever behind the caboose. My direction it forward, come what may.

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Sunday, May 14, 2006

The Biggest Adventure

TODAY'S QUOTE:
The biggest adventure you can ever take is to live the life of your dreams.
Oprah Winfrey

Man oh man...What a delight that is to contemplate. It is a much greater reality than even the most vivid imagination could ever conjure up. The life of my dreams was always pretty simple. I just longed to have the right to be me without being blamed for it as if it was some crime that deserved punishment. I have reached a point where I am easy in my own mind about who I am and if others do not approve I survive without the torment I once felt.
I am far from perfect, but I am certainly better than I could have been from all the damage that has been done to me in the name of love. I never in my life demanded that anyone be anything other than what they were to deserve my affection. I never returned hurt for hurt, I just kept loving blindly and that has been my biggest crime. To finally have the life of my dreams I had to accept myself in the same way, flaws and all.
I dream on paper every day, my mind demands release and I attempt to share the good and bad as example or warning to all who come in contact with me. I demand that my pain produce some good somehow then I kick it aside and go on. The overcoming is the life of my dreams, and living it is magical no matter where I am.
Pain is not a place, but some spots hold the memory of it and keep it more alive if you linger there. Unresolved agony keeps on taking its toll as long as you are determined to carry it with you. The life of my dreams is not pain free, but it is worth the pinches. The footsteps taken to find where you belong often include places where you trip and fall. To me it is not the stumbles that matter all that much, it is the fact that I refuse to stand frozen in spite of my fear that is the most important factor to being satisfied with whatever I have.
I once was certain that my life would remain the nightmare that others seemed to demand I suffer through. Now I know differently. Life is what you make of the bull shit that is tossed your way. Once upon a time I built a pretty prison out of mine, now I light each chunk to illuminate my way past the stink. To me that is progress and a life that moves forward is the life of my dreams.

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Saturday, May 13, 2006

The As If Treatment

TODAY'S QUOTE:
Treat people as if they were what they ought to be, and you'll help them to become what they are capable of becoming.
Goethe

I have found this to be true, from both sides of the fence. I like the quote very much, because it validates a concept I realized from first hand experience and try to practice in my relationships. Treating people as if they are faith worthy is a special kind of validation and encourages the best possible behavior. Gentle persuasion is such a positive thing and makes us all better people.
We have no power to change others by force and no right to try, but many use that method in different degrees. When we push against someone they usually do one of three things; they either pretend to do what we want, close down altogether, or push back. None of these options bring about anything lasting or positive.
The "as if" treatment encourages without demanding. People will do things to please you that they never even realized they were capable of. Nobody likes to disappoint someone who is not constantly judging their every move. Faith given in a positive fashion makes it much easier for someone to have belief in themselves. True faith in yourself is empowering and often it begins with someone else's faith in you pushing you on. I know this to be true. Thank you, Charity for my first lessen in the "as if" treatment, and thanks to all who believe in me now.

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Friday, May 12, 2006

Rights Of Consumption

TODAY'S QUOTE:
We have no more right to consume happiness without producing it than to consume wealth without producing it.
George Bernard Shaw

This quote is profound and should make us all remember that any happiness we obtain at the cost of anyone else's torment is tainted and will cost us dear in the end. Every tear we cause out of greed or injustice will be put on our final bill in one fashion or another. The world is full of sharks who eat all they encounter and I get much comfort from knowing that they will pay a higher price for living than the innocence they consume with such pleasure.
I wonder what causes a person to become a shark? Nature or nurture? Are some born predators or is there a process of pain that shapes them into thinking the rest of us are shark bait? I have been eaten, spit out then eaten again often enough to know the intense pain of being someone else's meal. With me it has always been ones who swear their undying love that have done the dirty deed of showing me their stomach lining. Beware of sharks who love you. They not only gulp you down but also eat your young if they can.
I do not hate sharks, even the two who left their teeth marks upon my heart did not earn any hatred from my direction. I mostly feel sorry for them, because they waste their life in a pursuit that kills their own souls. I hate the acts they do. I hate the waste and ugliness they surround themselves with. I hate knowing the water is infested, but to hate them would make them winners.
The ones who chewed here did not put me belly up, they slowed me down some and made me cry for a time, but defeat me..never. I am a stronger swimmer because I shared the water with them. And when they are beached with a crowd of angry victims surrounding them I wont be among the screaming masses there. I was a bright little fish who traveled on and they will never forget how I glistened as I swam. I will not go back to see more pain even if it is theirs. I wish them no pain, I wish them the peace they will never have that I possess in abundance and tried to share with them.

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Thursday, May 11, 2006

Rest Relations

TODAY'S QUOTE:
Rest is a good thing, but boredom is its brother.
Voltaire, 1694-1778, French Writer and Philosopher

The relationship between rest and boredom is kissing cousin close, but I do not suffer from bouts of the latter. I think it is because my mind is rarely allowed to rest, no matter what the rest of me is doing. I enjoy the simple process of thought so intensely that I am forever entertained. Another possible reason is all the years I spent isolated with no hope of doing anything very interesting.
It was better to learn how not to hunger for what I felt I could never hope to eat. I did not spend my time with my nose pressed against the windows of my imagination finding reasons to be dissatisfied. I learned to experience intense pleasure at the smallest thing, because small things was all I had. Now that my options are wide open, I carry that ability with me. I get all I can out of everything I do.
I sometimes wish for more than is offered, but I accept reality and go on without a mighty struggle to capture what is not willingly given. I do not let what I want devalue what I possess. I am not made bored by what is, by obsessing on what could be. Giving careful attention to every moment lengthens it, so the wondrous ones are electric. My energy wraps around them and sucks them dry of every drop of joy I can possibly feel.
We are a race of thrill seekers. Fun has to be orchestrated, and next weeks installment has to be better than the last or we feel like its not good enough. I watch the frantic search for pleasure of some of my fellow travelers and am glad I do not buy into their ideas of bigger is better.
Bigger is relative. Learning to get a bigger thrill out of a smaller thing is a huge lesson of immense benefit to all students. Study it well, pass it on then boredom will be a much less destructive force. Dissatisfaction begins in the ocean of the mind and poisons all the little fish that brighten our journey.

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Wednesday, May 10, 2006

Each Day

TODAY'S QUOTE:
Each day comes bearing its gifts. Untie the ribbons.
Ann Ruth Schabader

The way you unwrap the day foretells what you will gain from the living of it. If you hate its dawning, you will rough handle it. If you love daybreak you will embrace it gently. I am always happy to have a new beginning, most mornings lately I am smiling wide before my eyes are even open. I untie the ribbons slowly, and unwrap the gift with special care as not to rip the pretty paper surrounding it. I am well aware that each day is either enriched or spoiled by the seasoning we put on it.
Anything you face with an angry heart and sour attitude is the master of you by default. The hateful things lose their hold when you adjust the way you view their importance. If you hate something that cannot hate you back or feel your spite then what is the point of doing it? If you cannot change it then outwit it internally. Pointless living is soooo...ummm...pointless. Duh!!! Why waste time feeling intense negative emotions over unchangeable realities?
Change it if you can, accept it if you cannot. Rise above it, tunnel under, go around but do not be simply satisfied to let it eat you alive. Face it with grace and you put it in its place. Face it with spite and you give it all the rights. It owns you and steals all it can. Each day is a gift, do not feed it to vultures.
Untie the ribbons slowly with as big a smile as you can summon up. At first try it may be tiny and uncertain. Carefully undo the taped places on the fragile wrappings that surround the gift of one more chance. Let your eyes linger on all the beauty that lays within, ignoring the negatives that tell you why you are not worthy of having such a present. Push away all the things that try to soil what is brand new with left over dirt from all the yesterdays wasted or forsaken.
Each day is a new life waiting to be really lived. Face it, embrace it, own your space, savor the moments, dying will come all too soon, no need to help it along. Love the day enough to validate its dawning with some measure of pleasure and it will return the favor somehow amid all the clutter. But you have to be farsighted enough to seek what is sometimes hidden.

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Tuesday, May 09, 2006

No Pessimist

TODAY'S QUOTE:
"No pessimist ever discovered the secret of the stars, or sailed to an uncharted land, or opened a new doorway for the human spirit."
Helen Keller

I am always astounded by the wisdom of this blind, deaf, and speechless woman. It makes me a bit sad to think that others with all five senses live their whole lives in a mostly senseless fashion. She was brilliant, imprisoned by health issues, but she found a way to give the world the treasures of her dark silent kingdom. She fought for every inch while others waste the gifts she never possessed. Right on Helen, again and again your words echo, even though they were silently said so long ago.
I am an optimist by nature and by choice, but I have always been attracted to pessimists. My husband was so pessimistic that it kept him firmly in place his whole lifetime. In our later years together some of my optimism rubbed off, but not enough so that he could produce it without my prompting. Hope would not have made his life longer, but it would have made it much richer.
I have unshakable faith in the power of tomorrow. I have belief in everyone's ability to tap into deep wells of energy that lay hidden under the useless things we gather and pile up inside of us. I have hope, because a hopeless life is no life at all. Helen knew by nature, and spent her whole life trying to teach the masses to reach their true potential. She had to overcome odds that would defeat most. The things most of us have to surmount are obstacles we place in our own way.
Hoping can be learned. Belief can be developed. Faith can be discovered. An act soon becomes fact if given the exercise it needs to become strong. Negative natural traits can be curbed and new ways of reacting can be learned. Even the toughest meat can be tenderized with the right handling. Habits come in all flavors, distasteful ones do not have to be ingested forever. Some can be outgrown, some can be outlived, and most can be outwitted. The choice is yours to make. Enlightenment is so empowering. Flip on the light and see all the gifts you possess then use them.
Helen was trapped and she found a way out. My God, if she could do so much with so little how much are we capable of??? Why leave it up to chance??? Why let life be only something that happens to you??? Why not happen to it??? I do, and I am forever optimistic that tomorrow will be better in some fashion than yesterday. Sometimes the improvement is hard to find, but there is always something to be happy about. I would much rather spend my time digging up one small treasure than just sit idle and let myself be buried in bullshit.

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Monday, May 08, 2006

A Necessary Start

TODAY'S QUOTE:
Start by doing what's necessary, then what's possible, and suddenly you are doing the impossible.
Saint Francis

Actions tumble one against the next if given just a bit of encouragement, like dominoes one act prompts another until the whole deed, or a series of them are accomplished. I have found it very helpful to use tunnel vision whenever possible to allow this option to work its magic. Somehow it is much easier to get things done if I do not look at the mountain that needs climbed, but concentrate upon the next step to be taken.
Looking too far ahead can be overwhelming, so why insure defeat? Confidence in your ability to succeed is a great mountain climbing tool, but it is not simply handed out to everyone, it must be earned by degrees. Every journey begins with a first step; long trips take more time to reach a destination than short ones do, but both require the same starting point.
Necessities are required actions, you may put them off if it suits you, yet they will not simply go away just because you do not act upon them. Usually they build momentum and derail you if they are ignored long enough. There is an effort that goes into no effort at all and its one I just hate. The strength it takes to force a bothersome detail out of my head is most times much more costly than just biting the bullet and getting it done.
Once the gotta do's are out of the way then we can pick something to attempt that requires some imagination. The wanna do's are a lot more enjoyable than the gotta do's and they give so much more than the obvious. Memories of the most vivid sort come from the wanna do's and in the end it is much better to have a hefty wanna do list, with many of them crossed off, even if all of them do not turn out as imagined.
In my golden years I will have a long list of gotta do's that I accomplished. I will also have an endless list of wanna do's that I gave my all to, which hopefully should limit my wish I'd done this or that list to very few. What better reason to push that first domino over than the chance of reaching a point of few regrets.
I got notice of a new flash movie, so I am adding a link here for it. The message is worth the view. Enjoy, I did!
http://www.inspiringthots.net/movie/train-life.php

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Sunday, May 07, 2006

The Race

TODAY'S QUOTE:
The race is not always to the swift, but to those who keep on running.
Anonymous

Determination counts more than speed in this mad race that is life. Outside forces push and pull at us to conform, but it is the inner power that gets us to the finish line and dictates what shape we are in when we get there. Speed is not the deciding factor, it is perseverance that most often crowns the winner.
Racing madly is not really living, flying by things of great importance only causes us to miss seeing scenery that might benefit our understanding of ourselves and others. Enlightenment is the trophy for any well run race, even the slowest to cross the finish line can claim this prize.
The speedy and the greedy may reach there before I do. I stopped caring about most of the contests that either would enter, because their rules of fair play are so different from what I am comfortable with. In some areas I can run with the big dogs and others I do not care to even try. I get some enjoyment knowing that if they tried to outlast me on my home track they would not have a chance in hell of going the distance.
We each have our own laps, landscapes that only we know, miles that only we travel. Mine leads me many places, but wherever I go I carry Journey's End with me. It is a state of mind and a way of life that encompasses many things and countless people. The past echoes here, but does not control the future. This is my center and as long as I keep its diminutions within sight I am sure to finish the race a winner, no matter my speed of travel.

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Friday, May 05, 2006

Distinguished Dreams

TODAY'S QUOTE:
"All men and women are born, live suffer and die; what distinguishes us one from another is our dreams, whether they be dreams about worldly or unworldly things, and what we do to make them come about... We do not choose to be born. We do not choose our parents. We do not choose our historical epoch, the country of our birth, or the immediate circumstances of our upbringing. We do not, most of us, choose to die; nor do we choose the time and conditions of our death. But within this realm of choicelessness, we do choose how we live."
Joseph Epstein

Well, amen to that mouthful of solid truth. Birth itself is choiceless, and our origins are like grabbags, take what you get and make the most of it. We are not all blessed with equal birthrights, either; some of us are born into tragedy, some into poverty, some into prosperity, and some are given extra heavy burdens to carry due to health issues, but all of us dream in one form or another.
There are people who never lift anything heavier than a thought toward making any dream come true, and there are those who never stop attempting to give life to their imaginings. There are those who never believe and those who never have a doubt. What puts us into one group or the other is our attitude and that is something that can be changed as our awareness of its power becomes clear.
I once simply adopted whatever was placed upon me by others, at least outwardly. I studied the actions of loved ones and excused bad behavior I never would commit myself. I formed opinions I never voiced. I accepted crumbs as if that was all I deserved. I was not aware of how much of my silent sorrow was caused by my own attitude. I dreamed of better days but did little to make that my reality.
I thought I had no choice when truly I held all the keys to the kingdom. Each of us holds our own, yet many of us never realize how we set the stage for how we are treated by how much value we place in our own worth. How we react or if we react at all sets the perimeters of our relationships, and the most important friendship we ever have really ought to be with ourselves.
Once we alter our attitude it is a sure bet that our dreams will become more than just distant longings of things we wish were true. They become vivid blueprints of what surly will be if we put some effort into making it happen. Life itself is a gift and how we unwrap it is up to us. Handing it to someone else then complaining about how they abuse it makes no sense, but all too often that is done in the name of love.
Real love does not seek to control, it only hungers to share. Words said that contain no actions to back them are simply words said and nothing more. I learned this over and over, but I know it by heart now. I dreamed of possessing unconditional love. It was only a dream until I gave it to myself first then it became a reality in its own fashion. My attitude toward myself has made my life richer and it spawned a dream that is acted upon here.
I received the following email and place it here to illustrate how the smallest kindness can inspire someone to keep dreaming. Thank you, June!



A GLASS OF MILK

One day, a poor boy who was selling goods from door to door to pay his way through school, found he had only one thin dime left, and he was hungry. He decided he would ask for a meal at the next house. However, he lost his nerve when a lovely young woman opened the door. Instead of a meal he asked for a drink of water. She thought he looked hungry so she brought him a large glass of milk.
He drank it slowly, and then asked, "How much do I owe you?"
"You don't owe me anything," she replied "Mother taught us never to accept pay for a kindness"
He said ... "Then I thank you from my heart."
As Howard Kelly left that house, he not only felt stronger physically, but his faith in God and man was strong also. He had been ready to give up and quit.
Many year's later that same young woman became critically ill. The local doctors were baffled. They finally sent her to the big city, where they called in specialists to study her rare disease. Dr. Howard Kelly was called in for the consultation. When he heard the name of the town she came from, a strange light filled his eyes.
Immediately he rose and went down the hall of the hospital to her room. Dressed in his doctor's gown he went in to see her. He recognized her at once. He went back to the consultation room determined to do his best to save her life. From that day he gave special attention to her case. After a long struggle, the battle was won. Dr. Kelly requested the business office to pass the final bill to him for approval. He looked at it, then wrote something on the edge and the bill then sent it to her room.
She feared to open it, for she was sure it would take the rest of her life to pay for it all. Finally she looked, and something caught her attention on the side of the bill. She read these words .. "Paid in full with one glass of milk" (Signed) Dr. Howard Kelly.
Tears of joy flooded her eyes as her happy heart prayed: "Thank You, God, that Your love has spread broad through human hearts and hands."
There's a saying which goes something like this: Bread cast on the waters comes back to you. The good deed you do today may benefit you or someone you love at the least expected time. If you never see the deed again at least you will have made the world a better place - And, after all, isn't that what life is all about?
The hardest thing to learn in life is which bridge to cross and which--to burn

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Thursday, May 04, 2006

Every Strike

TODAY'S QUOTE:
Every strike brings me closer to the next home run.
Babe Ruth (1895-1948)

The cycles of life are like that; good follows bad, and bad follows good in a never ending fashion, as it really should if you think about it logically. Too many of us just toss the bat into the dirt and walk off the field when continuing to swing brings us ever closer to the home run we all hunger to achieve.
If practice makes perfect in anything we attempt to master, why are we so determined to quit before we get to pro level? I think some stop because it is hard to keep trying and they would rather be layed back in a recliner with the remote. I know some get hurt too often to make it seem like a smart act to keep on beating what they view as a dead horse. Some buy into what others say about their ability. Some just vegetate, without need of anyone or anything outside their tight little safe circle.
I view the bad as lessons. I view the good as rewards. I view myself as worthy of a home run, so I just keep batting while I still possess the strength to swing the bat. To do less would mean I feel I do not deserve to play at all, and I will never allow that thought to gather strength and zap my resolve to really live as fully as possible.
I know I am bound to strike out from time-to-time. The odds of always hitting the mark at every swing are zero percent, but every honest attempt brings some measure of hope for success. To not bat at all means I would have to simply stand on home plate and watch the ball wizz by and lose my turn by default. What a sad image that produces in a mind that refuses to just stand on the sidelines watching others play the game.
I choose to keep slugging, not because it is easy, but because it is the only sure way to achieve any measure of true pleasure from what is too often a brutal game. Life is bitter-sweet enough without me adding to the bitter by not valuing the sweet enough to risk another defeat. Losing by not trying is not a fate that will ever belong to me.

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Wednesday, May 03, 2006

I Would Rather Live

TODAY'S QUOTE:
I would rather live in a world where my life is surrounded by mystery than live in a world so small that my mind could comprehend it.
Harry Emerson Fosdick

My life overflows with mysterious possibilities, but only because I do not limit myself to the mundane. I challenge, I question, and I explore whatever is happening inside of me and whatever life offers with the same gusto. I lived a life so stifling, for such a very long time, I just naturally rebel against walls of any sort. I climb the ones that try to keep me out and knock down the ones that try to fence me in.
I do not hold myself safe and secure within boundaries placed as markers of lines never to be crossed. I do not fear the unknown, but welcome it as a great alternative to the same old tired actions repeated by rote. I ask more of myself than rut walking, I demand that life gives me more than it takes. I push when necessary and tug when possible, always paying special attention to each moment as if it were my last.
Little pleasures are magnified and slowed to a pace that seems to lengthen each delight. My memory holds a magical scrapbook of snapshots taken as I have challenged life to give me all it can. I could have just as easily compiled one filled to overflowing with flashes of the bitter disappointments I have suffered, mostly silently. Somehow celebrating my defeats does not seem a very good use of my time, so I keep the lesson and delete the image as soon as I no longer need it to highlight what needs to be learned.
A mind left to wander where it will usually lingers upon the negatives. The brain is a wonderful thing to explore and magical in its power to shape what goes on around us with just a bit of prompting. I ask mine to do things in a measured way because I know that each thought pattern holds its own price for use. Any power given to the negative costs dear and any positive delivers treasures beyond the imagination. Control your space using that measure as your guide and unlock your possibilities. I did and have found a place of happiness that nothing negative can touch. The trip here was brutal, but the destination was worth every ounce of agony suffered to get to this point.

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Tuesday, May 02, 2006

Compensate And Console

TODAY'S QUOTE:
Imagination was given to us to compensate for what we are not; a sense of humor was given to us to console us for what we are.
Mark McGinnis

The imagination can be a wonderful tool, but it can also be used as a crutch when reality is not wholly to our liking. We can trick ourselves into believing the most unlikely of things with just a tweak or two upon the dial between hopes and desires. Wishes are not reality. Longing is not fact. Dreams take more than the having of them to come true.
Sometimes actions of our own are all that is required, sometimes other people hold the key to the door between the imagined and the factual. The former is the best bet; if real effort is put into it we can be certain to reach some level of success. When it depends upon someone else the results are unpredictable.
I have had so many lessons of this sort in my lifetime, making it impossible to give my energy wholly to any imagining that involves anyone else. Some measure of fantasy is impossible to dismiss, but I am most careful nowadays to limit it to its smallest common denominator so that any heartache is as minor as I can make it. Some things are just too hard to swallow in one huge gulp, better to keep the bites small as possible for safety sake.
I do not struggle over-long upon facts that cannot be denied. I allow them to hurt as badly as they need to, before I sooth them with acceptance then I travel on. Tears come, but never in an oceans depth. Sorrow lingers on for as long as it needs to, yet it has to follow me past its place of impact. Life goes on, it must or why bother.

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Monday, May 01, 2006

Two Great Gifts

TODAY'S QUOTE:
Life offers two great gifts: time and the ability to choose how we spend it. Planning is a process of choosing among those many options. If we do not choose to plan, then we choose to have others plan for us.
Richard I. Winwood

The art of planning is SO important to master; truly if we do not our life is never truly our own. The ability to ride the crest of opportunity is a wonderful thing as well, but without setting your feet on a path of your own choosing it is too much like a crap shoot to be comfortable.
I moved through the first 40 years of my life like a sleepwalker. I was directed first here then there by the people I loved, but it was rarely where I really wanted to go. Words of protest got stuck behind the wall that surrounded me. To speak would have risked their displeasure and lost me my place in their hearts. I THOUGHT!!!
Keeping quiet earned me nothing, certainly not love, and most certainly not any measure of respect. Puppets are played with then put back on the shelf. They are viewed as empty inside, but I was far from empty. I over-flowed with things that nobody knew of and nobody really understood, least of all myself.
Then I awoke!!! Every moment since then has been fully lived. Not always wisely, but always with determination to get something out of it. The bad gave just as much as the good. Brutal times make us examine things in a closer way. When I looked deep I realized that my life was just a shadow walk and I have been determined to light my path with the truth every since October 30, 1993.
Some truths have been ugly, some beautiful, but all have been my own. So use the time you have wisely, both good and bad. Learn from all you experience. Cut the puppet strings if you have them. Really live!!!! I have and have fewer regrets than I used to possess when others moved my feet.

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